Chapter 15
Amy walked inside her house, unable to stop smiling. Tonight had been fun, more than she’d anticipated. The movie was great,
but the company was even better. It turned out Max liked to whisper comments during movies, which didn’t bother Amy a bit,
since she was inclined to do the same thing. She’d learned over the years to keep quiet, although sometimes she couldn’t help
herself when something ridiculous or wonderful happened on screen. Britt was tolerant of her habit, but it drove Laura to
near madness, and one time she’d showed her the duct tape in her purse as a warning. Amy wasn’t sure if her friend had been
joking or not.
Daniel had never minded comments during movies, though.
She whisked her ex out of her mind and thought about Max again. When they were leaving the theater, she’d felt him touch her
lower back as they threaded through the crowd. But he quickly dropped his hand and didn’t touch her again as they walked back
to their cars. They’d stopped by his Mercedes first—she wanted to get a better look at his fancy car—before they said their
good nights and parted ways.
As she passed by the kitchen, she remembered what she felt when he pressed his fingers against her back. Nothing. Nada. Zip. Which confused her a little. While she was firm in her decision not to date, if she did change her mind, Max would be the perfect candidate. There was no doubt she found him handsome. He was polite. A true gentleman, actually. Smart, successful, and funny.
But she wasn’t attracted to him. Not one iota.
She walked to her room, took off her makeup, changed into her lemon-yellow silk pajama set, and went to the kitchen to get
a drink. It was barely past nine, and she wasn’t tired yet. Maybe she’d read in the living room or watch another movie until
she was ready for bed.
When she entered the kitchen, she saw Britt standing in front of the sink. “Hey, sweetie,” Amy said, giving her a hug. “How
was your day?”
Britt turned off the water and dried her hands. “Good. I was just about to make a snack. Crackers and cheese. Want any?”
She was still pretty full from the popcorn and Junior Mints, but she nodded. “Sure. I’ll get the drinks.”
A few minutes later they were seated at the table with a plate of sliced cheddar cheese and buttery crackers between them,
glasses of iced tea at the ready. “So how’s your project going with Maude and X?”
Britt froze, a cheese-laden cracker halfway to her mouth. Her eyes widened. “M-my project?”
“Yeah.” Amy picked up a cracker. “Has Maude finally decided to do that mural on the back wall of the shop? She’s been talking
about it for years.”
Her daughter paused, then quickly nodded. “It’s in the planning stages.” She shoved the cracker in her mouth.
“I should stop by soon. It’s been too long since I’ve visited Plano’s quirkiest couple.”
“Uh... sure. Just not on Mondays.”
“But that’s when you’re there,” she said. “I figured I’d bring pizza and we can hang out in the art room.”
“Education room,” Britt corrected, snatching another cracker. Instead of eating it she was breaking it into crumbs. “It’s closed on Monday for... a special project. But I’m not involved with that one.” She let out an awkward noise. “Besides, X is gluten and dairy free, and Maude is allergic to, um, oregano.”
“I could bring Chinese—”
“Perfect!” Her smile was too wide. “How about on Wednesday?”
“Okay.” She tilted her head as she took a big gulp of tea. Her daughter was acting a little odd. “Everything all right?”
Britt set down her glass and smiled. “Yes.”
Amy’s concern evaporated. She hadn’t seen such a bright smile on Britt in... months? A year?
“I’m planning Savannah’s shower,” she said. “Would you like to help?”
“Of course.” Now it was Amy’s turn to beam. “I talked to her mother at church last Sunday. Dawn said the whole family is excited,
but a little sad that Savannah and Justin are moving away.”
“I am too.” She brushed the cracker crumbs into a neat pile on the table. “I’m going to miss her.”
“I know you are, sweetie. I will too. But you can...”
“Visit?” Britt looked up.
Amy nodded, although she knew that wouldn’t happen anytime soon. Not unless she went with Britt, and even then, she couldn’t
see the trip being easy. At times, she wrestled with not pushing Britt a little to be more social. Maybe they should have
taken more trips during the summers when she was off from school. But up until five years ago, Amy had either taught summer
school or took classes herself, and there was no time, money, or energy to go on a real vacation. By the time there was, Britt
was still in therapy, and even more adverse to leaving the confines of Allen and Plano.
Britt stared at the crumb pile for a moment.
“There’s plenty of time to decide,” Amy said. “And you don’t want to go too soon. They’ll be newlyweds, after all, and who
wants to be around all that romance .”
“Yeah,” she mumbled. “Who wants that?” Then she lifted her head. “Where did you go tonight?”
Amy paused. Should she tell Britt about Max and the movie? No, not until she figured out their relationship, if it existed
at all. There was no point in bringing him up if she wasn’t going to see him again, even as a friend. If they started hanging
out more often, then she’d explain it to her daughter.
Britt was the major reason why Amy had never pursued a relationship, although she’d never tell her that. With her anxiety
disorder and her father’s abandonment, she didn’t want to add to Britt’s problems by bringing a man into the dynamic, only
to have her attach to him and then be devastated if the relationship didn’t work out. She wouldn’t put Britt or herself through
that again.
“I went to the Mango Movieiplex,” she said, deciding on a half lie. “They had a one-night showing of Vertigo that I wanted to see.”
“Since when did you become a Hitchcock fan?”
“I like a suspenseful movie every once in a while.” She swirled the ice in her tea. “And it was something different. I hadn’t
been to the movie theater in a long time.”
Britt pressed her lips together but didn’t say anything.
Amy wondered if Britt was blaming herself for that. She hoped not. Time for a topic switch. “Let me know what I can do for
the shower.”
“Savannah texted me a list of her bridesmaids, and she’s still deciding on a theme.” Britt shrugged. “She wants it to reflect her wedding theme, but in a particular way.”
“That sounds like Savannah,” Amy said. “In a way that makes your job easier.”
“That’s probably why she’s doing it.”
“Are you nervous about the shower?”
“Not as much as I thought I would be.” She smiled again. “I want it to be perfect for her.”
“Then we’ll make sure it is.”
They finished the snack and Britt headed to her room for the night, while Amy went to the living room. She glanced at the
book lying on the table beside her recliner, a novel she was struggling to get into. It was one of those celebrity book club
picks, and while the writing was good, the subject matter was a little dark, not exactly her preferred reading material. Instead,
she picked up her phone and decided to watch a couple of Britt’s videos.
She watched the latest one that Britt had uploaded last week about painting on wood. She was hand-lettering the words Take Risks on a thin, rectangular piece that looked like the kind of blank signs K3
She sat up straight and looked at the name. Sober4lyfe. Who was this guy? Or girl? Quickly she shot off a text to Britt.
Who’s Sober4lyfe?
***
Britt was shoving her arms into her vintage Jackson 5 T-shirt when her phone buzzed. She pulled down the shirt and picked
up the phone.
Who’s Sober4lyfe?
Oh no. Britt was still dealing with her guilt over lying to Mom about Mondays and art projects. She’d even dragged Maude and
X into her deception. But she didn’t want to share Hunter with anyone. Not yet. Their friendship—and she had to keep using
that term or else she’d start writing his name all over her sketchbook and drawing hearts around it—was too new. Too special.
And now Mom had found Dad’s YouTube handle. When he told her he wanted to comment on her videos, she hadn’t thought much about
it. No one would know who he really was anyway. There were so many comments on her videos that most of them got lost in the
shuffle.
She paced, trying to figure out what to say. Maybe now was the time to tell her the truth. But she wasn’t sure. She feared her mother would be furious with her, and then fight with Dad. She’d seen enough of that as a child, and she didn’t want to witness it again.
More importantly, she didn’t want her father to have a reason to leave again. Not when they were just establishing a relationship.
She had to type something, or her mother would be at her door any minute now.
Britt: I don’t know.
Mom: He/she commented on your last video. Called you honey and then 3
Britt couldn’t help but smile. That was sweet.
Mom: Don’t respond. You don’t know who’s behind the screen name. He/she could be a criminal.
Britt: I won’t. I rarely respond to comments, just mostly like them.
Mom: I see you haven’t liked this one. You need to keep it that way.
Britt: Okay.
She tossed her phone on her bed and scowled. When would her mother stop badgering her about online safety? I’m not a child. She would never do something as careless as get involved with a delinquent. She’d even been super careful with Hunter, and he turned out to be one of the best things that ever happened to her.
Sitting down on her reading chair, she thought about their conversation at the café again. They were slowly learning about
each other. Their different tastes in foods, colors, and activities. She would have to show him the light when it came to
yacht rock, though. He had no idea what he was missing.
What they hadn’t talked about was their families, and she was fine with that. Hers was so confusing right now, and she didn’t
want to get into the past. She was enjoying the present, and that was enough for her. They would get to know more about each
other as time went on.
Her phone buzzed again. She got up and grabbed it off her bed.
Good night, sweetie. I love you.
How could she be upset with her now? She smiled and texted back.
Britt: Love you too. Thanks for looking out for me.
Mom: Always
She stared at the screen, keyed up over lying to her mother, getting treated like a two-year-old, and now feeling enveloped
in love and security. Her mother was the only person in the world she fully trusted, and that included Savannah. No matter
what, Mom had her back.
But she wished she had someone to talk to about this. She didn’t want to bother Savannah with her family drama, although she knew her friend would drop everything and be there for her. That wouldn’t be fair to her, though. This was Savannah’s time to shine, and she needed to focus on the upcoming wedding, her move, and her fiancé.
Talking to her father about it was out of the question. If he knew her mother had discovered his screen name, he might stop
commenting altogether. Britt didn’t want that. She liked seeing his cute little messages.
She moved her thumb across the screen to her very short list of contacts and saw Hunter’s name. They’d already put a period
on the end of their day with their prior text conversation. She’d been relieved when he told her he had a standing time to
play video games with his friend and hadn’t left so fast because she’d said or done something weird. She didn’t want to take
up too much of his time. He had a life outside of her.
Her gaze stayed on his name. Then she tapped on it.
You awake?
He immediately answered.
Hunter: Yep.
Britt: How was the video game match?
Hunter:...
As she waited for him to reply, she got up from the chair, turned on the lights, then snuggled into bed.
I beat the pants off him.
Britt chuckled.
Britt: That must have been a sight.
Hunter: You can only imagine. On second thought, don’t. ?
She turned on her side and started typing.
Britt: Have you ever had something you needed to tell someone, but couldn’t bring yourself to do it?
Hunter: Like a big secret?
Britt: Yes. Exactly.
***
Hunter gripped his phone and stared at Britt’s text. Dread flowed through him. Had she somehow figured him out, and this was
her way of leading up to telling him she knew about his past?
The thought was crazy and fleeting, but he still had a sick feeling in his stomach. If she ever decided to do an online search
of him, she wouldn’t find much. He didn’t use social media and his father had made sure every trace of his past arrests and
incarcerations had been scrubbed from the internet. As a top-notch criminal lawyer, he didn’t need his son’s bad publicity
affecting his career.
The sick feeling switched to guilt for not being completely honest with her. Then it morphed into curiosity. Was she holding
something back from him?
If this has to do with me, don’t worry. You can tell me anything.
He realized it was an egocentric text, but he didn’t want her to fret over talking to him. And eventually he would tell her
everything, after he proved to her beyond a shadow of a doubt that he was a different person than the punk kid of his past.
No. It’s not you. It’s... someone else. Two people actually.
He was relieved, but he noticed she was being vague.
Hunter: I suppose everyone’s got a secret or two they need to hold on to. Sometimes people keep secrets to protect someone
else.
Britt: I think this is one of those cases. But how do you know when it’s the right time to tell them?
The million-dollar question.
Hunter: I wish I had an answer for you. Only you can determine when it’s time.
Britt: I’ve never kept a secret before. I’ve always been an open book. Although that’s easy to do when you don’t have many
friends.
Up until recently, Hunter had also been an open book, but in a bad way. He snuck his first drink when he was twelve, when he was at a friend’s house and they busted open a six pack from his parents’ refrigerator while they were out for the day. Ever since then, he’d never tried to hide his drinking or intermittent drug use, at least not much. He always got caught, and upon reflection, he thought that was probably the point—to see how far he could push his parents, to find out how much they would cover for him.
What he never considered was how much pain he’d cause them. Or himself.
Hunter: I’m sure whatever the secret is, you’re keeping it for a good reason.
Britt: Maybe. It’s all so confusing .
He wanted to hop on his bike and meet her somewhere, to hold her hand and reassure her it would be okay. Texting was so impersonal
and could be misconstrued, even though it was his primary mode of communication.
Britt: I’ll figure it out.
Hunter: You okay?
Britt: *thumbs-up*
Hunter: Sorry I couldn’t be more help.
Britt: You were helpful. I just needed someone to listen.
Hunter: I’m here any time you need me.
He paused, wondering if he’d gone overboard. This was all so new to him, having to measure his words and actions. He didn’t
mind, but the margin of error was razor thin sometimes.
Britt: Thanks, Hunter. Good night.
Hunter: Good night.
He set down his phone and turned over on his side, his covers bunched halfway up his bare torso. He’d been drifting off right
before she texted, but now he was wide awake. He thought about watching another one of her videos but changed his mind. Earlier
today he’d almost spilled the beans about falling asleep to her calming voice. If she found out he’d done that, it would set
his progress with her way back.
Add another secret to the list. And he couldn’t even say his reasons for keeping secrets from her were noble. He wasn’t protecting her, although he tried
to convince himself of that. He was chin deep in self-preservation. Maybe he hadn’t changed that much after all.
He flopped over on his back and stared at the ceiling, barely visible in his darkened bedroom. He needed to set a deadline
to tell her the truth, but he also needed enough time with her so that when he did reveal his past, she wouldn’t be shocked
and tell him to take a hike.
After Dad’s party. That was in nearly a month, plenty of time for he and Britt to get closer. He could reveal some things about his family too,
to enable trust.
He shut his eyes. This all sounded so calculated. But he didn’t have a choice. Not if he wanted to keep Britt in his life.
And he wanted to... desperately.