The Nevermore Murder Club and Smutty Book Coven Group Chat
Arabella: I am going to KILL Gideon.
Maisie: You can’t kill him. He’s immortal.
Arabella: Not once I’m done with him. How could he arrange a visit from the Conclave representatives and not tell me? I’m a joint investor!
Winnie: Alaric only told me about it just now, too.
He says that he was afraid the Nevermore Coven would, “out of the goodness of our hearts”, find a way to upset the delicate political process and ruin our chance.
I’m disappointed. It’s not as if we’ve ever messed things up with important dignitaries before.
Dora: Er…
Winnie: We have?
Maisie: You’re new to the book club, so you don’t know about the incident with Komal and the Duke of Edinburgh that shall never be mentioned again.
Komal: No one told me he was afraid of heights! What man blubbers like a baby on a simple picnic?
Maisie: Well, when the picnic is on top of a forty-foot cliff…
Komal: It was scenic! I was showcasing the best of Argleton’s natural beauty. And I fixed it, remember? The Duke’s office personally wrote me to say that he has never before received such an “audacious” gift basket, and he never wishes to receive one again.
Celeste: And there was the time Komal accidentally summoned a demon at that witches’ summit.
Komal: That was hardly my fault. I knocked over a candle!
Who leaves ritual candles lying about in the village hall?
It’s a fire hazard. But I fixed that, too.
Augustin wanted to throw the book at the witches for violating the fire code.
But I convinced him they’d hex him if he pursued it.
The witches of Argleton should be THANKING me.
Winnie: Oh dear. I don’t want to tell Alaric he was right.
Komal: I resent this. You sound like you’re on Durant’s side. He tried to talk me out of running for mayor because he thinks I’ll mess up the Conclave visit.
Komal: Well, he can forget it. I’m not dropping out just so he can have his little vampire tea party. I’d be just as good at negotiating this deal as he is.
Arabella: I don’t know about that.
Komal: Are you saying I can’t negotiate with vampires?
Arabella: The delegates won’t even consider your arguments until you complete their rituals.
Beth: Are these rituals dangerous?
Arabella: Let’s just say that I’ve become fond of Komal’s organs remaining on the inside of her body.
Augustin can be the one eviscerated if it all goes wrong.
Besides, vampires aren’t exactly accepting of humans storming in and saying they know what’s best for us.
What with all the burnings and stakings over the centuries.
That’s why Alaric didn’t want to tell Winnie. Let the vampires sort out our own laws.
Komal: No way. This is our village too, and our friends’ lives! Team Komal for Mayor is on this, and I need every bit of info you’ve got, because I’m going to keep my insides on the inside and land the greatest human–vampire treaty since… since the last human–vampire treaty! When was that, again?
Arabella: This is going to go AMAZINGLY well.