Chapter 2
Grizzly
When I was a kid, I wanted to live among the clouds. To me, they represented freedom. You couldn’t catch a cloud. Couldn’t scold it or tell it to be more manly. You could only take in its beauty as it floated past.
There was a park on my way home with a field I used to visit after school. I’d lie in the warm grass, my backpack tossed beside me and stare at the sky. Time would pass in a blur as I let my imagination take hold.
Even as I got older, I still gravitated to that field. It felt the same at nearly six feet tall and two-fifty as it did at three feet and less than a hundred pounds.
My last day before leaving for college, I spent nearly the full day there.
I alternated between excitement over a new start and sorrow over losing my safe place.
Would I find a place like this in my new home?
Would there be any comfort once I was away from the people who made me feel like I was always somehow less?
I didn’t have the answers back then.
Sometimes, I worried I still didn’t know.
Having parents who felt you were inadequate and often told you such was rough. I learned from an early age that agreeing with them was easier than fighting back. Folding to their demands kept me from hours of lectures and threats.
Part of me suspected my love of all things soft stemmed from that time in my life. A time when I found solace in simply existing with nature or burrowing into my comforter when the voices were too loud.
It’s no wonder I surrounded myself with anything and everything plush once I settled on a home. Looking around my playroom always brought a smile to my face.
Rough day at the office? Playroom.
Lonely? Playroom.
Everything could be solved with a soft blanket, a stuffie, and the beautiful clouds painted on my walls. At least, that’s what I’d told myself before everything changed.
I was in my office working through client requests. As the only full-time person in my company, I had to keep on top of things or else we’d get backed up. It wasn’t all that hard to manage if I didn’t ignore my work.
Or if I didn’t have to fight my tired eyes.
Rubbing them again did little to help the distorted images on the screen. Everything blurred together before clearing up again. Though it was something that’s happened every once in a while in the past, this time it was holding strong.
Frustrated, I finally stood from my desk and began pacing. Maybe I needed to not look at a computer screen anymore. Could it be that my eyes were simply exhausted from working too much? That was totally a thing that happened.
I mean, what the hell else would it be?
Despite not liking them, I ate my carrots to keep good eye health. I worked out regularly, and I didn’t abuse my body with drugs or alcohol. It had always been important to me to keep a clear head.
After a few minutes of marching around my office, I settled into my chair to see if I could get back on track. There were things to take care of. Things that required my eyes to work properly.
A knock at the door drew my attention. Moseley, one of the part-time interns who came to help me out, stuck his head in the door, grin wide and easy like always.
“Everything ok in here? Cheyenne said she heard what sounded like stomping a few seconds ago.” His voice held a note of curiosity. I had no doubt he wanted to be able to deliver the latest gossip back to his partner-in-chaos.
The crew that helped me out was a rowdy bunch. I liked to think of them as something like little siblings because of how much I took them under my wing. That and they all seemed to enjoy keeping tabs on me as if we were truly related.
I shook my head. “Everything is fine. I didn’t mean to make a bunch of noise. I was just having some trouble with my eyes not wanting to work right. Maybe I need a nap?”
The thought shot through me, lighting up my dopamine registers as I pictured myself at home in my bed cuddled with a bear or two. Maybe three.
Sue me. I liked to be surrounded by my favorite things.
“A nap? I don’t know about that, boss. If you need me to read over some stuff though, I’m happy to help. I’ve wrapped up the list you gave me.”
He stepped into the room then, his excitement growing at the thought of helping me. No surprise there. Moseley might have been nosy, but he was also the first to volunteer when a task needed completion.
“Do you have anything else time sensitive going on? I don’t want to pull you from a project.”
“Nah,” he said, waving his hand around. “I’m caught up, hence why I came to investigate. Let me have a look.”
He practically skipped across the room. When he rounded the desk, I stood and gave him my seat.
The way he wiggled once he sat made me smile. He would make a great agent one day, if he kept at this. His kind heart would make him desirable for a lot of athletes. It had definitely worked for me.
I couldn’t count the number of times people reached out to me because their agent was being an asshole. They’d realize those bullheaded people who were all about the loud, demanding deals, weren’t always the best choice. Not when someone was queer or a person of color or a woman.
There were different rules for them. Other methods had to be navigated because systemically, they were fighting twice as hard for a seat at the table.
Distracted by my own thoughts, I almost missed Moseley’s explanation of what I’d been trying to read. It had been an email from a potential client. Normally I could increase the font to see it fine. But even that didn’t work.
“Dear Mr. Thorson,” Moseley started reading.
“My name is Paxton Wells. I’m a college senior looking to be drafted into the pros this summer.
The agent I’ve been working with violated his contract.
He’s since been terminated, and I’d really love the opportunity to work with you.
I think we’d make a great team. Please see the attached tapes of my games, along with some of my stats.
I hope to hear from you. Bellport is my top choice.
There’s nowhere else I’d rather be. Sincerely, Paxton. ”
I hummed, attempting to gather my thoughts over the inquiry. Moseley began reading the stats out loud. My brows climbed with each figure shared.
This kid was good. Damn good.
“You’re going to reach out to him, right? There’s no chance he’ll be agentless for more than a week. Paxton is the top contender for the draft this year.”
“He is?” I asked.
Moseley nodded as he leaned away from the desk to face me. “The guy is a legend already. He’s been talked about since his freshman year of college as an example of what baseball players should look like on the field. I’m surprised you don’t know this.”
“Not sure if you’ve noticed how few baseball players we have. The majority of my clients are football or hockey players. I can’t keep up with every single one the way I’d like.”
“What if you brought in another agent? Or hired more full-time help? Then you could expand your reach,” he suggested.
I leaned my hip on the edge of the desk and crossed my arms. “True, but I don’t know of any agents who’d want to come work here.
Bellport is a relatively small place. A lot of those guys tend to want to go to the big cities to strike the best athletes.
The bigger the city, the more money they can earn. ”
“True. The men tend to think that way.”
“Are you suggesting I hire a woman agent?” I held up my hand to stop whatever he wanted to say. “I’m not against the idea. I only ask because I need you to be specific. It sounds like you have a reason for wanting gender to play a role.”
“Oh, okay. I thought we were about to throw down in the office.” He chuckled awkwardly.
“Not in the least. I’m all for inclusivity and diversity in the workplace.”
Moseley smiled wide. “In that case, I can recommend at least three women I think would fit well here and one non-binary person. All are big supporters of what’s been going on in Bellport the last few years. They also have a good track record with clients.”
“Jot them down on a notepad. I’ll look into them later this afternoon.”
He accepted the task with ease. As he worked, I thought about the email he’d just read to me. If Paxton was as good as Moseley said, then he would definitely be snatched up in a heartbeat.
The fact that he emailed me at all is telling. Though I wasn’t really sure what it told me. I’d have to figure it out.
“While you’re here, can you email Paxton back to request a video meeting? It sounds like he’s not close.”
“He’s not. Guy plays for New Roughoak University up north. And I can definitely email him.”
Moseley was true to his word. He stuck with me through the rest of the afternoon, working far longer than he needed to.
Cheyenne even popped in at one point to ask if she could help us with anything.
Her voice held a note of amusement. Probably because she also knew Moseley was feeling like a kid in a candy store doing all this work with me.
He’d made it known more than once that he admired me.
While it wasn’t the reason I brought him on, it definitely worked in his favor. I needed open-minded people who saw our clients as humans, not just a paycheck.
Once we wrapped up the work for the day, Moseley clocked out and stuck around to talk to me about the candidates he suggested. I ordered us takeout from the Thai place up the street since it was a favorite for us both.
“Michelle Pinnit is tough as nails in meetings, from what I hear. Sarah Telks is an advocate and philanthropist for all things queer. Christina Dayn has mad RBF, which helps during negotiations. She’s also a single mom to an athletic daughter looking to take the world by storm.”
“All sound like they’d fit right in,” I told him as I scooped up more noodles. “Wasn’t there another person?”
“Good memory. The final person I suggest is Auden Keyes. They’re newer to the game.
So far, they’ve worked with a few star athletes who didn’t get the attention they deserved for one reason or another.
Auden is able to see the diamond beneath the coal.
Their clients typically do really damn well once they sign on. ”
I tilted my head. “Do you have a personal interest in Auden?”
“No! Why would you think that?”
“Because you said more about them altogether, and your tone was definitely higher in register. Kind of like how you were when I suggested we get Thai.”
Moseley’s shoulders curled forward, bowing his body. I waited him out since this was a big deal. Bringing in another agent was about more than if Moseley had a crush on them. It needed to be about the business above all else.
“Fine,” he said with a heavy sigh. “I do like them. But it’s more in a I’m fascinated by you kind of way. I heard them speak at a conference a year ago. It was fucking amazing.”
“It’s hero worship and not lust? Is that what I’m getting?”
“Lust hasn’t really factored into it. At the conference, I was too far away to see them well. And after, it was absolute chaos with people wanting to get to the next session.” His voice was steady as he relayed his perspective.
I felt better knowing Moseley wasn’t trying to use my business for his own personal dating. It was also interesting to me that he’d suggested Auden based on a single event— which I’m sure is what led to him watching them over the last year.
“Reach out to all of them to see if they’d like to talk business with me. Keep it discreet though. I don’t need word getting out everywhere or I’ll never have a moment of peace.”
“Sure thing, Grizzly.” He wrung his hands together; his body coiled like he had more to say.
I grunted. “Was there anything else?”
“Umm… well… you see, sir. I would like to schedule you an eye appointment. That font on the screen was stupid big. If you’re having trouble, there might be more to it.”
While I didn’t like the idea of needing medical intervention, I also wasn’t an idiot. Moseley was right. Something had to give.
“Here’s my phone. Use my medical app to make the appointment for later this week if possible. I’d rather know sooner than later.”