17. Don’t be sorry
seventeen
don’t be sorry
Aunt Sylvie turned off the kitchen light and began walking down the hallway. “Please don’t stay up all night again. You two need to sleep some. I don’t care if it’s the weekend. Got it.” She called out to us before going to bed.
Dexter and I had just put on a movie we rented. “Okay,” Dexter said back to her before pressing on the VCR. Some horror movie that Dexter had picked out against my better judgment started playing.
“Dude, come on, another horror movie. Can’t we watch something else?” Grabbing the blanket from the couch, I clutched it to my chest. Dexter loved these movies, and I hated them. He knew that. I guess that’s what I got for letting him pick the movie at the video store.
Dexter laughed, shoving me gently. “Relax, you’ll be fine. It’s not even that scary. I watched it the other day with Rich. It’s good, I promise.”
“Okay, well I’m going to bed if I decide it’s too much.”
The movie started playing, and immediately in the first scene, an entire house was killed by some killer no one saw.
Blood and guts everywhere. I threw the blanket over my head.
The jump scares terrified me, and it never made sense to me why people loved it.
But Dexter was one of them, and he smiled through the entire film, watching with wide eyes in anticipation.
Watching him watch the movies was more exciting for me than anything.
About 20 minutes into the movie, we had moved to sit on the couch, in our usual spots on either end.
Dexter had his feet on the coffee table, and I sat with my feet pulled up under the blanket.
His eyes were glued to the TV screen, waiting with bated breath for the next scene to unfold.
“I thought you said you already watched this. Why do you look like you have no idea what’s about to happen? ”
He put a finger over his mouth to silence me and pointed to the TV, and I readjusted to a more comfortable position. Still sure to not let my feet off the couch, scared that some invisible entity may come from under the couch and grab my feet or something.
My gaze was fixed on the TV as I watched the main character wander through the woods.
The music was low and quiet but building the anticipation; I knew something was about to happen.
Clutching the blanket close to my chest, I waited for the inevitable.
As soon as the ghostly figure appeared in front of the girl, I jumped and quickly covered my face with the blanket.
Chuckling lightly next to me, Dexter pulled me into his side.
The tension I had been holding released immediately.
When I tried to move back over to my side of the couch, he pulled me tighter to him. We sat like that through the rest of the movie.
The credits started rolling. “I’m never watching that again.” I picked up the remote and started rewinding the VHS. When I looked over at Dexter, his eyes were closed, and his head leaned back comfortably on the couch. My mouth twitched into a small smile.
Once the movie finished rewinding. I put it in the case and set it on the table. Walking over to Dexter and placing my hand on his shoulder, I shook him lightly. “Go to bed, dude.”
Dexter’s hand gripped my upper arm, and he pulled me down.
I caught myself on the back of the couch, straddling his lap.
He settled his other hand on my waist and gently guided me to sit back on his legs.
He never broke eye contact with me. My breathing was ragged.
I had no idea what he was doing, but I knew I didn’t want him to stop.
I’d been out with a few girls from school, but it never went anywhere.
They were attractive, and we had fun hanging out, but I could never kiss them or take it any farther.
Then they’d never talk to me after that.
Dexter knew all about this. He had been my best friend since we were kids.
Of course he knew all of this. He knew everything.
So why was he trying to kiss me now? And why was I okay with it?
Dexter’s lips brushed lightly against mine, and I trembled.
When he pressed his lips against mine, he didn’t force the kiss.
It was gentle, and I didn’t feel like I was trapped.
Cool air hit my back where it was exposed to the living room.
My hand remained on his shoulder, even though both of his hands rested gently at my hips.
Suddenly I felt like I was in control and I kissed him back.
He ran his tongue along my bottom lip, and I took his lip between my teeth, biting gently.
He gasped and moaned into my mouth, and it was the best thing I had ever heard.
When I was kissing Dexter, I didn’t feel like I had to get away. It wasn’t my step-dad holding me down and forcing his tongue down my throat. My mom wasn’t in the other room knowing what was happening and choosing to ignore it. This was Dexter, and he was letting me let this happen.
With both hands, I gripped the back of Dex’s head, and he pulled me closer to him. Our hard-ons were resting on top of one another now. I was so turned on, and it put my mind at ease to know he was too.
Needing to take a breath, I leaned back slightly and looked into Dexter’s bright green eyes. Our breaths were all over the place. “Sorry.” He leaned forward and rested his head on my chest.
Pulling his hair lightly caused him to lift his head back up. “Please don’t be sorry,” I said, leaning down to kiss him again.