38. Elena
ELENA
T his morning, Adrik said he wanted to start the first day of our marriage right. That meant spending time in bed before we got up and began working.
As the day went on, though, and I got hooked on the possibility of uncovering more than I might have initially bargained for, I realized that I’d almost forgotten about my new status of “normal”.
The one that meant I wasn’t alone and that I had a family.
The one that meant I had a husband to think about and secretly smile over.
Closer to dinnertime, I checked my phone and realized how late it was.
It didn’t bother me that he hadn’t checked in on me. He’d mentioned during our morning shower that before he got too busy, he had to meet with a guest who hadn’t left from our wedding yet. Some other crime boss from the Big Apple.
Yet, he hadn’t checked in with me since that meeting would’ve happened. A smidgen of guilt hit me that I’d been too in the zone to realize that the day, and the start of the evening, was zipping by.
I bit my lip and worried that something might be wrong.
We’d smooth out how to be a couple in our home and also working in this same location.
It’d be a work in progress, and to be fair, we’d only reconciled and come together for a couple of weeks now despite the almost four months I’d been here altogether.
As if on cue, Adrik entered the office.
“Sorry!” I winced as I turned, assuming I was late in coming to dinner. “I’m really getting into something here and I haven’t considered stopping yet.”
He held his hand up as he approached. His expression was too somber for my liking, and I was immediately uneasy. He seemed patient, though, as he cut me off and came to kiss my forehead. “Relax.”
I smiled up at him, but he didn’t reply with one of his own.
“I only wanted to come and let you know that I need to go out with Maksim to speak with someone on the Strip.”
I nodded. “You don’t need to report to me,” I said, laughing lightly.
He was the boss, not me.
“I was hoping that our first night in marriage would end with us sharing dinner together, at least.”
I smiled. “Technically,” I said as I stood and faced him slowly, “our first night of marriage was last night.” Leaning against him, I hugged him tightly and sighed happily.
He’d always be a busy man, but I wasn’t so needy for him and his attention that it was a requirement for me. I wasn’t clingy.
“Besides, I’m not sure you could pull me away from this angle I’m working on.” I gestured at the computer behind me.
I kind of thought he’d smile. Or that he’d act intrigued and curious. He always had. Even when we weren’t necessarily close and getting along as smoothly as we were now, he’d given me his rapt attention about what I found with the books and the investigation.
“Then I won’t worry as much about leaving you to your own devices.”
I blinked, more than a little surprised.
That… hurt. It almost seemed like he was dismissing me.
If I hadn’t noticed the stress lines he couldn’t hide and the mixture of anger in his eyes, I would’ve fallen down the rabbit hole of thinking we were reverting to that terrible lack of communication from before.
He kissed me again and left, telling me that he’d see me as soon as he could later tonight.
Weird.
I stood there, frowning at the door he’d gone through.
Maybe he’s not dismissing me. But he’s dismissing that I could be onto something that would matter.
That didn’t make sense, though. I knew for a fact that investigating that shadow network and looking into his uncle were a priority. And that was precisely what I was doing.
Instead of going back through old documents and tracking when money went years ago between these shell companies, I’d returned to the present. Or to the more recent past.
I began looking through what my father had been doing when those mistakes started showing up with the Volkov accounts.
When those labels of insufficient funds began popping up.
My father had been moving money around, and it seemed like there was a pattern of him doing it to funnel it to one of the larger unclaimed shell companies.
I sat back down and resumed my work. Dedicating my attention to the computer, I shoved aside my worries about Adrik’s behavior.
Give it time, El. This is new. For both of us.
I was the only woman here, other than who was on the household staff. I didn’t need someone to point out that Adrik and I were sort of pioneering into a new phase for the family.
We’d learn how to manage this, the constant duties of working and being together.
As the hours passed and I nibbled on a plate that someone from the kitchen had brought up to me, I dug in deeper. Determined to have something to present to him by the time I called it a night, I focused and copied all the proof I came upon.
My eyes felt like they’d cross if I stayed up any later, though.
I gave up and headed to bed, wondering if he’d be home before I fell asleep.
In uncanny timing, or maybe an ideal coincidence, he came down the hallway from the grand staircase as I walked down the corridor that led to where I’d been working.
“Thank fuck,” he said when he saw me.
I raised my brows, slowing for him to meet me as he tugged at his tie.
He was exhausted. Anger radiated from him as he approached, but it seemed more like a residual stain of a fury he couldn’t lose hold of.
“Just who I wanted to see.” He clutched me and kissed me deeply, as if pressing his lips to mine was a reset on his soul. It felt like it was to me. I was recharged with the need to see him less stressed, concerned and wishing I could help him.
“I always want to see you,” I told him as he took my hand and led me toward our room.
“Even when I’m like this?” He pointed at his face, indicating how grumpy and miserable he looked.
“Especially when you’re stressed,” I said as we entered our room. “Because if I can, I want to help you, Adrik.”
He let out a deep breath, taking off his coat and starting to undo his shirt.
Even though he was stripping, it wasn’t a tease or a prelude into anything fun or sexy.
With every garment he took off, he seemed to lose a layer of responsibility.
I assisted him, listening to him begin to talk about why he was so stressed and mad, so overwhelmed today.
All while he spoke, I listened attentively, and he disrobed me too.
Slowly and almost leisurely, we got naked and into the shower, but there was no frisky playfulness. No heated looks. While he talked about the confirmation they’d received about his uncle being alive, I knew in a heartbeat that this was too serious of a topic for either of us to suggest sex.
He didn’t only share about the evidence that Gregori was alive. Courtesy of one of the Italian Mob families who were old allies, they had photos that proved Gregori had faked his death. He’d been living abroad, moving constantly and staying off the radar for many years.
I didn’t want to break his stride of talking, so I kept my mouth shut.
But if I had found a pause to speak, I would’ve brought up how this tracked with what I had been so invested in researching today.
This pattern of Gregori staying mobile was evident in how he’d moved money through the shell companies he’d started up.
“Lev took it the hardest,” he admitted once we’d dried off and got dressed.
He wasn’t done using me as a sounding board, going on to explain how he had to consider the impact of this confirmation on his brothers and cousins.
We lay in bed and I listened carefully, stroking my hand on his arm in case he wanted to feel more grounded and comforted in the process.
I would always give him my attention like this, and that was when I truly realized that he wasn’t using me.
He was valuing me as a partner to open up to.
A sounding board, yes, but a confidante he trusted with the inner workings of his mind.
He bade me good night after kissing me deeply. When he thanked me for listening, even though we were both yawning by then, I corrected him that this was what I was here for.
“I will always be here for you, Adrik, however you need me.”
He fell asleep quickly, hugging me as he spooned me, but I stayed awake for a little longer.
My mind was too busy as I reflected on how I wasn’t a thing he’d gotten out of a payment for punishment due to my father.
He wasn’t treating me poorly and dismissing me earlier. He’d just had too much on his mind.
I smiled sadly, reflecting also on how far I’d come since meeting him. I didn’t need to worry about being dismissed or rejected or unvalued with him. And that was part of how I could find strength in my new identity as his wife. As his partner.
No matter how long the bad times persisted or the good times blessed us, we would be in this fight together, forever.