Chapter 14 Ella
ELLA
Ella took one last bite of the crisp and tender sweet potato dish before pushing her plate away slightly.
“You’re full?” Dalton asked, a little hope sparking in his bright blue eyes.
“Sure,” she said, smiling. “Have at it.”
He had already put away his steak and salad, and it did her heart good to see the healthy young man enjoying a good meal after a hard day’s work.
Everything about tonight had done her good, really. They had traded half a dozen funny Andy stories, and eaten well while they were at it. She felt more relaxed than she had in a long time.
“Why are you smiling?” Dalton asked, pulling her plate closer.
“This has been really nice,” she heard herself admit.
“I think so too,” he told her with a warm smile. “I hope you don’t think we talked about your brother too much.”
“Not at all,” she said with a smile. “You know, it’s funny. He was always the one who made me laugh. I’ve missed that. I feel almost like we brought him back for an hour or two.”
“We did,” Dalton said, his voice slightly deeper with emotion.
“He was family to you,” she realized out loud.
He nodded, and she suddenly had a lump in her throat.
“Well, he would have loved to know how much the rest of us like having you around,” she told him, willing herself not to cry.
“May I interest you in dessert?” Geno asked, approaching the table with dessert menus.
“Oh, I couldn’t,” Ella said, placing a hand over her belly.
Dalton smiled at her and shook his head to the waiter.
“I’ll just bring the check then, sir,” Geno said.
Ella grabbed for her bag.
“No,” Dalton said firmly. “You agreed that I could take you to dinner.”
“Thank you,” she said, turning back to him. “That’s very kind.”
“It’s not kind at all,” he said, giving her one of his funny half-smiles. “I’m just an old-fashioned guy.”
She nodded, pressing her lips together, and didn’t argue when Geno came back and presented Dalton with the bill.
She had been telling herself all night that it was okay to relax and have fun, okay to smile at Dalton and enjoy his company, because really they were just friends.
But his insistence on paying the bill reminded her that he didn’t necessarily feel the same way.
And that was fair. She had felt a frisson of electricity between them more than once during the night. They were well-suited to each other, and they had chemistry, whether she wanted to admit it or not.
Dalton was a gentleman, and he wouldn’t force her into a relationship she wasn’t ready for. But she was feeling nervous about how this evening would end.
What if he tries to kiss me?
As he placed a few bills under his glass for a tip, a fantasy of him kissing her entered her mind, unbidden. She could feel her heart racing, and practically taste the masculine scent of him.
Rattled, she grabbed her bag and scrambled up before he could pull her chair out.
To his credit, Dalton didn’t react. He simply rose himself and they headed through the now-crowded restaurant together.
It had been quieter when they first arrived, but now it seemed like there was a former classmate of Ella’s, or a friend of her mom and dad’s at every table, smiling at her knowingly and checking Dalton out without a hint of subtlety.
Just put one foot in front of the other, she told herself. Don’t worry about whether people are judging you.
At last, they made it outside. The cold breeze felt good to her heated cheeks, and she instantly started to feel more like herself.
She slowed her pace and allowed Dalton to open the truck door for her again. But she scrambled in quickly before he could offer her his hand to help her up.
He got into the truck, and as soon as he turned the key, Elvis was crooning “Blue Christmas” on the radio.
“Oh, this is a good one,” Dalton said appreciatively.
“I like it too,” Ella said with a smile. “Andy used to sing along.”
“Oh yeah?” Dalton asked.
She nodded, smiling at the memory.
“Well, we wanted him with us tonight,” Dalton said. “What do you say?”
“You want us to sing?” she asked, surprised.
“Sure,” Dalton said. “Unless you’re chicken?”
Ella answered by belting out her best Elvis impression.
“Wow,” Dalton hooted. “Here we go.”
The next thing she knew, he was singing along as well, his deep bass hitting every note with a passionate delivery that made him seem like an actual rock and roll heartthrob.
The song was over too soon, and Ella found herself breathless with laughter at their impromptu concert.
“That was good,” Dalton said, nodding to himself. “Honestly, I think we should take this show on the road.”
Ella could only gasp for breath and laugh some more.
“What other talents have you been hiding from me?” he asked her, cocking one eyebrow up when he glanced over.
“None,” she promised him. “And I know I can’t sing.”
“Of course you can,” he chuckled. “I’ll bet you can dance too.”
“Not really,” she told him.
“You’re telling me you didn’t take ballet lessons at that cute little place in town?” he asked.
“Well, I mean, obviously yes,” she said. “But everyone in Trinity Falls does. I wasn’t any good.”
“I’ll be the judge of that,” he teased her. “You can dance for me when we get home and I’ll let you know.”
She laughed, knowing he was only joking. It had been forever since she had danced in any way. Definitely not ballet, but she hadn’t even been out dancing with Lee since before Dove was born, before he got sick.
The weight of the memory of a particular night landed on her chest and she suddenly felt like she couldn’t suck in a breath.
“You okay?” Dalton asked, as if reading her mind.
“I’m fine,” she said, trying to shake it off.
“Come on,” Dalton said softly.
“I feel like all I ever talk about is Andy and Lee,” she said, shaking her head.
“No,” Dalton said, shaking his head. “Mostly you talk about Dove, and the farm, and your parents. And I think it’s wonderful. But I’d be honored for you to talk about Andy and Lee whenever you want.”
“He loved to dance,” she said, unable to hold it in. “Lee did. It was something he hated about being sick, that we couldn’t go out anymore.”
“I bet,” Dalton said. “That must have been awful.”
“I used to put on music at home sometimes,” she said, remembering. “He’d dance me around the living room, for a minute or two.”
“Did he dance with Dove?” Dalton asked.
“No,” Ella said, her heart breaking a little. “By the time she was big enough to enjoy being danced around, he was too weak. And she wouldn’t have remembered it anyway.”
“You talk to her about him, right?” Dalton asked, sounding tentative.
“Of course,” she said. “All the time. She knows how much he would have loved spending time with her.”
“That’s nice,” Dalton said. “I like how you guys talk about Andy all the time.”
“Oh, she knows all his funny stories,” Ella said. “You’ll have to share a few with her.”
He nodded and they drove on in silence for a little while.
“How did you do it?” he asked quietly.
She could have asked what he meant, but she knew.
“I did it for Dove,” she said right away.
“It must have been so hard to have a little one to take care of in the middle of so much loss,” he said, shaking his head.
“There were times when I thought I might never sleep again,” Ella admitted. “But looking back, I know that she made it easier. I couldn’t fold, I couldn’t disappear. I had to show up and put one foot in front of the other for her. She saved me.”
The big man was silent, but when she looked over, he was swallowing hard.
Too soon, he was pulling down the driveway to the old farmhouse. The fields looked so peaceful in the moonlight, it almost took her breath away. A spray of stars twinkled against the dark velvet sky.
Dalton parked the truck and turned the key, cutting the engine and “The Carol of the Bells” at once.
“I know we might have an audience the minute we step out of this truck,” he said, his voice a little gruff. “But I wanted to tell you that I had a great time tonight. I hope you’ll let me take you out again, Ella.”
“That would be nice,” she replied, her voice almost a whisper.
His intense blue gaze flashed over to her, and she was certain she saw deep satisfaction there, as if he had unlocked something precious.
“I guess we’d better get inside,” she said quickly, her cheeks burning, and her hand already on the door handle.
She expected him to put a hand on her shoulder, turn her toward him, lean close and kiss her.
But he made no move to stop her, and she scrambled out of the truck into the cold night on her own, feeling the relief she had expected, but also a sinking disappointment that surprised her.
“Everything okay?” Dalton asked, his deep voice startling her slightly.
“Yes,” she said. “Sorry. I was just thinking I should hurry in and try to say goodnight to Dove, but we’re probably way past her bedtime.”
“Don’t count on it,” Dalton chuckled, nodding toward the front window, where the pigtailed silhouette of a certain someone peered out at them.
“I guess they let her stay up since I don’t go out often,” Ella said.
I don’t go out ever, she corrected herself inwardly.
“That’s really nice,” Dalton said, sounding like he meant it. “Your family is something else.”
“Yes,” she said, suddenly feeling light as air. “They really are.”
“Mama, mama, mama,” Dove yelled out as she opened the front door. “Did you have fun?”
“Sorry,” Mom mouthed over her shoulder.
“We had so much fun,” Ella told her, sweeping her up in her arms and giving her a big kiss on her soft cheek. “Did you have so much fun?”
“We made a million cookies,” Ella crowed, wiggling to get down and show off her treats.
“Well, that’s good news,” Dalton said, a smile in his deep voice. “Because I’m hungry for exactly one million cookies.”
Dove howled with laughter and ran to Dalton, grabbing his hand and dragging him into the house with her.
“It’s okay if I eat them all, right?” Ella heard him ask as they disappeared down the hallway.
“You can’t eat all of them,” Dove gasped between giggles.
“Hey,” Mom said quietly to Ella when she moved to follow. “Are you okay?”
“Yes,” Ella said, nodding thoughtfully. “I wasn’t sure I would be, but it was really nice to go out. Thank you for being with Dove.”
“You know it’s a privilege for us,” Mom said dismissively. “So, you enjoyed spending time with Dalton?”
“It’s nothing serious,” Ella said right away. “We’re just friends.”
Mom nodded, but a frown tugged down the corners of her mouth for a moment.
“You’re worried it’s more?” Ella guessed.
“I’m worried that you don’t want it to be,” Mom replied.
“You really like him, huh?” Ella teased. “You want me to keep him around.”
“I want you to have someone in your life,” Mom said, her voice calm but serious. “I want you to feel safe opening your heart again. I do like Dalton, but it doesn’t have to be him. I just don’t want you alone.”
“How could I be alone?” Ella asked. “I have you and Dad. I have Dove.”
“Dad and I won’t be around forever,” Mom said softly. “And Dove will grow up and have her own family one day.”
The idea hit her like a kick in the stomach. Though of course it wasn’t the first time she’d had that exact thought.
“It was just dinner, Mom,” Ella said, not wanting to get into it. “We don’t have to worry about twenty years into the future. One step at a time, right?”
“Right you are, kiddo,” her mother said, pulling her in for a quick hug. “And I don’t mean to pressure you, my love. Now you’d better get in there and admire your daughter’s cookies before she explodes.”
“And before Dalton eats them all,” Ella said with a smile.
But as she followed her mother into the house, she couldn’t help thinking about what she had said. She couldn’t imagine life without seeing her parents and Dove every day.
If these really were the happiest remaining days with her family, maybe she ought to take her mother’s words into consideration and find someone to share them with.