28. Raelyna
RAELYNA
“We shouldn’t be getting close like this,” I finally whispered into the silence, the words nearly lost to the night air as I fully stood, placing a few steps between us.
“And why exactly is that, starlight?” he asked.
“I mean . . . this is crazy. You’re a literal spy .
. . for the Aurelian Guild. And I’m—” My eyes caught on the black markings on my left forearm, a reminder of where my future lay, no matter how much I dreamed otherwise.
In that moment, all my thoughts dropped back toward my reality in a crushing breath.
“We just—we shouldn’t—” My fingers dropped to my forearm.
“You said that already,” he said as he pushed off the couch and stopped before me, tilting my chin up to look at him. And by the stars, I hated that he hadn’t kissed me on the couch a minute ago. I hated how much I wanted him to kiss me . . . to feel his lips covering mine.
Callum reached out, his fingers covering mine as he traced the black mark on my forearm.
“I know. It’s just . . . you’re a spy. You’re here on a literal mission.
And I—I have to figure out how to keep my family safe.
It doesn’t matter if there’s something here—” I trailed off as I gestured between us.
It doesn’t matter if I feel an unexplainable pull toward you.
If I feel safer with you than I ever have, even though I have every reason not to.
“Lucanus’s reign won’t last forever,” he replied.
“What if it does?” I could barely force the words out.
“It won’t.” His voice was a low rasp. “I promise you that, starlight.”
I gave him a sad smile. “We’ll see.”
He laughed. It was a warm laugh, so unlike the one I’d heard coming from Lucanus recently. “There’s no ‘we’ll see,’ Raelyna. Lucanus’s world will come crashing down around him, one way or another.”
“I hope so,” I replied softly, but I didn’t know if I could believe it—if I could truly trust his words. And even if it did, that didn’t mean that things would change between us. “Even if things changed, we live two different lives . . . in different Quarters.”
“It’s okay to let yourself find hope on the horizon. You know that, right?” he asked me, his voice softer than usual.
I looked up, studying him, wishing I could read what was going through his mind right now.
I nodded, even though I wasn’t sure if I could fully believe there was light capable of breaking through the darkness.
Because the reality is that we all lie.
Lie to ourselves.
To others.
To those we love most.
Like when I tell myself it will be okay. That it’s all going to get better. That maybe I could escape this hellhole and start over.
It’s a lie.
I know it is.
But for a fleeting moment—a brief second—I let myself believe it.
Callum didn’t say anything, he just stood with me in my silence, the shadows swallowing our thoughts, our wants, our desires. I don’t know how long we stood there, letting the night pass us by as we stared into each other’s eyes, before he broke the silence eventually.
“Come on.” His voice was low as he entwined his fingers around mine, tugging me with him.
“Where are we going?” I asked, letting him lead the way . . . in my apartment.
“I’m about ninety-nine percent positive I saw half a box of pizza in your refrigerator.” He shot me a dimpled grin as he led me toward the kitchen.
“Seriously?” I scolded. “You’re going to hide out in my apartment and eat my leftovers?”
“Obviously,” he answered as he opened the refrigerator door before grabbing the box.
The suns would be rising in another hour, meaning Callum and Axel would need to be gone before they broke the horizon, and they could be easily spotted off The Wall.
I hadn’t yet told my friends what had happened last night—hadn’t told them that I was currently harboring two spies in my living room.
The two spies who were currently taking inventory of their supplies, and it had only taken the briefest of glances toward my kitchen table to know that we lived two vastly different lives.
My table was currently covered in a variety of firearms, bullets, and knives, which made the singular throwing blade Finn had gifted me appear pitiful in comparison.
Glancing at the time once more, I began to fidget, knowing they needed to leave in the next ten minutes if they wished to have any hope of getting far enough outside The Wall without detection.
A clamor of noise rose behind me, mixed with a chorus of excited yips coming from the fox who had clearly taken to Callum.
“Stop being a menace,” I said as I walked into the kitchen.
“Who are you talking to? Me, or the fox?” Blackwood asked as his gaze raked over me, and a blush of heat swept across my cheeks, my gaze darting from him to Loxl, then back to him. “And I’d be careful how you answer that question, starlight.” His voice was a low taunt that had me cheekily grinning.
“I’m talking to both of you,” I scolded. “But you and Pierce need to go before it’s too late.”
He nodded, strapping the last of his guns to the tactical combat vest he currently had fitted to his body.
“Do you really need that many guns?” I inquired, my fingers tapping against the table as Axel walked into the space.
“Can’t be too prepared,” he answered as he secured the last weapon.
“You both need to go. If you wait any longer, you will be stuck here until tomorrow.” My voice was stronger as I emphasized the urgency, my feet already walking toward the window facing the desert.
“We’ll be fine, starlight.” Cal’s voice was soft with reassurance as they followed me into the living room. “This is what we train for. Not to mention, Axel’s illustratio affinity comes in handy for shielding us when needed.”
I paused, looking over toward Axel as I realized how helpful a shielding affinity would be to a group of spies.
Axel stepped up to the window first, hopping up onto the ledge with agility as he glanced down before looking back toward Callum.
“Right behind you,” Cal’s voice rumbled in my apartment, and then Axel was jumping off my window ledge. I leaned over, watching as he fell freely before large golden wings expanded in the air, catching the wind, and he glided into the distance.
I felt Callum move behind me, preparing to follow after his second in command.
I turned, my body nearly touching him with the proximity, as I stared up at him, worry rising within me.
I bit my lower lip, wanting to tell him to be safe, but it shouldn’t matter.
I shouldn’t even care this much. He was a member of the Aurelian Guild, and I . . . well, I was just a dancer.
“Make sure you figure out how to let the markings break through,” Blackwood demanded of me as he tilted my chin up, forcing me to hold his stern gaze. “If you don’t let it break through, it will destroy you.”
I nodded, unable to affirm the words as he held my gaze for a moment longer.
“I’ve got your number; I’ll be in touch,” he said after another moment. “Don’t do anything stupid.”
“I make no promises,” I replied finally as I took a step back from him. He stepped toward the ledge, his hand on the windowsill, before he stopped.
“Oh,” he said, pausing to look at me one last time.
“Almost forgot.” I watched as he reached into a zippered pocket on his thigh, before he handed me a scarlet-colored thread of ribbon.
The silky material slid across my fingers as I held the ribbon in my hand, studying it for a moment before looking up at him in confusion.
“Don’t do so until I tell you to. But when I tell you, tie this so that it hangs outside your window.”
“We aren’t allowed to hang things on the outer edges of The Wall,” I replied. “Though I’m not sure why I would want to hang a piece of ribbon to begin with.”
“It won’t be visible to the guards who patrol The Wall,” Cal answered, his amber eyes holding mine.
“And how can you be so sure?”
“I just am,” he answered with a dimpled grin. My nose scrunched as I studied the ribbon. “And why exactly am I hanging the ribbon outside my window?”
“It will be a clear indicator of which apartment is yours from outside The Wall,” he answered.
“For the love of the stars, please tell me you’re joking,” I replied, staring at him.
“No?” he answered back.
“Let me get this straight . . . you want me to tie a ribbon to my window, just so you know which apartment is mine?”
“How else will we know it’s your place from outside The Wall?” he asked.
“We live in an age of technology . . . of surveillance drones, phones, TVs, and you want me to tie a ribbon outside my window so you can find me?” I asked, lifting the limp scarlet cord in my hand as I studied him, still trying to figure out if he was joking. “Seriously?”
“Well, do you have any better ideas?”
“Literally a million,” I replied. “But sure, fine, let’s go with a piece of ribbon.” I hurried as I shoved him toward the window lining the outer edge of The Wall. “You need to go.”
He nodded, his hand reaching out to tuck a wavy strand of hair behind my ear before he hopped onto the windowsill and, without another word, dropped off the ledge, spiraling toward the sands below, before a large, dark, golden set of wings burst forth from his back, carrying him along the winds as he followed after Axel into the darkness . . . away from Solis . . . away from me.