Epilogue Dylan
A lump formed in my throat as I looked out at the crowd. Somehow, graduation was here, and all that was left of our undergrad education was to walk across the stage and grab our diplomas. I couldn't believe it. Somehow we’d made it and somehow this was the end.
Brad’s hand came to rest on my back. “You okay?” His voice was hardly more than a whisper.
I nodded, just once. “Just surreal, I guess.”
“Come on, we should be excited,” Theo chimed in, standing on my other side. His arm wrapped around Charlie, who looked as nervous as I felt.
“I am. It’s just weird.” Did none of them feel it? I wasn’t worried anymore about what would happen, wasn’t worried that we’d never talk or that we’d be out of each other's lives once we stepped out of this center. Brad and I were stronger than ever. We’d spent every available hour wrapped up in each other.
Even when he got the call that he was going pro. Sure, I’d freaked out a little on my own, after I finished congratulating him and telling how much he deserved it. He did. Not that most people were surprised.
“I’m ready for this to be over with,” Shane said with a sigh, propping a hand on his hip.
“Why? Not excited to see your mom?” Alex teased next to him.
Shane laughed. “Mm…I’m excited for my sister. Mom will be Mom. Did your dad show, Dylan?”
I shook my head, feeling that lump in my throat again. “I don’t think so, no.”
Brad squeezed me against him. “It’s okay, baby. My family’s gonna cheer for you, too.”
I smiled a little. Not that I wasn’t thankful for them. Over the past months, Brad’s family had steadily continued to get to know me, and it was nice. To have people who cared again.
Against my better judgment, my thoughts turned to my mom and Frankie. What would they think if they were here? Would they be proud? Would they not care? Because they weren’t around, they hadn’t made any effort to be part of my life in so long. Even though I couldn’t help but think of them, it was getting easier to breathe. It was becoming less important to think where their feet had touched or whether I’d ever see them again.
I didn’t want to end up like that one pop star whose dad came into his life only when he got somewhere. That was too fake, and the reality for me was I didn’t have any family who wanted to be part of my life. My journey, whatever it was. I’d tried to make my dad care. I’d tried to ask him to be the one person I could depend on — he hadn’t managed it. So it wasn’t worth holding onto anymore.
“You guys are still coming to the gig on Friday?” I asked instead, eager to have something else to focus on.
All of my friends pursuing their dreams made me realize something. Even though I knew it would be hard, even though I still had doubt creeping up every now and again, I wanted to do music. Producing was great, and I’d always have that, but Brad made me realize I needed to believe in myself, too. He’d worked tirelessly and single-mindedly toward his pro football dream — and gotten it. So it was worth the risk.
“Wouldn’t miss it. Charlie and I are gonna be in LA for a few extra days just for it, man.” Theo smiled.
Shane nodded, and Alex wrapped his arms around his waist, hooking his chin on his shoulder. “We’ll be there.”
A warmth settled in my stomach, feeling Brad’s supportive arm around me.
Only then we were gestured to get ready. The actual ceremony was sort of a blur. I couldn’t look in the stands and see all those families without feeling dizzy, but I clapped for everyone who walked across the stage. Even though my hands felt sort of chapped by the time it even got to us.
When I walked across the stage, smiling a little at the Dean who handed me the diploma, I could hear the cheering and yells from Brad’s family somewhere in the seats.
I couldn’t help but laugh.
As we threw our caps into the air, I noticed even Shane had a wet glisten in his eyes, and I smiled. Brad kissed me in front of everyone. It was surreal still, and I wanted to hold onto it for as long as I could.
Maybe I didn’t have my dad or my mom or my brother, but I had family. They were right here, standing next to me.
And everything was going to be fine.