Chapter 55
Maple
Sorry, but why is no one talking about Ella’s siblings? They must want to find their sister too #findElla
‘That sounds legit,’ she murmurs sarcastically.
‘Yeah, but he’s saying – I mean, I’m guessing it’s a man – that Ella’s some star on the dark web. A porn star.’
Coco sucks in a breath. ‘What the fuck?’
‘I suppose that means she’s alive, which is good, but she must be in trouble if she’s doing that. No one chooses that kind of life, do they?’
‘No,’ Coco says. ‘I mean, some actors claim they do, but they’re all exploited, one way or another.
’ Her eyelids blink super-fast, like she’s trying not to cry.
It makes me wonder what’s behind her desire to get justice for Sophie.
Whether bad stuff has happened to her too. Maybe one day I’ll ask her.
‘So why would Ella leave her family for that?’ I ask now.
‘Remember this dude could be lying,’ Coco points out. ‘Which feels pretty likely to me, with a handle like that.’
I think about Coco knocking on strangers’ doors to get to the truth.
And Dylan, willing to take a punch from his dad to help find Ella.
‘You’re right; we shouldn’t take his word for it,’ I say.
‘Which means we need to go onto the dark web and find out for ourselves. I just know that’s what Dylan would do. ’
Coco gives me a weak smile. ‘And I’m sure he’d appreciate you saying that, but do you even know how to get on there?’
‘Well, no,’ I admit. ‘But I guess it can’t be that hard to figure out?’
‘I heard that you need to download a special browser,’ Coco says. ‘But if my parents found that on my computer, they’d kill me.’
‘Well, luckily, my parents couldn’t get any madder with me than they already are.’
Coco shrugs. ‘It’s up to you, babe. But there’ll be some gross stuff on there.’
‘I’m sure.’ I want to sound chilled, but it’s hard when my heart is thudding like a jackhammer on steroids. I understand enough about the dark web to know it’s where people buy drugs, and order hits, and watch snuff films, and stare at gross pictures of children. But I’m doing this for Ella.
I look up how to get onto the dark web on ChatGPT, then follow the instructions. But everything’s so slow that it’s excruciating. I want Coco to distract me as my computer whirs, but it’s like she’s weighed down by the stress of what I’m doing too because she barely speaks.
Eventually I get to a webpage with a list of categories. The page design is dark and cluttered, like it’s been built by people who don’t give a shit about aesthetics, and every category name feels like an unexploded bomb.
‘What should I choose?’ I ask, hearing the rising panic in my voice.
‘Well, is there anything about porn?’ Coco’s voice is weird too, like she’s being half strangled.
‘I mean, yeah, but there’s too much. So many categories.
Loads of different websites with bonkers URLs and .
onion domain names.’ I see now how stupid this is.
Of course there would be thousands of images on here, millions probably.
How did I think I was going to find Ella in this massive disgusting underworld?
‘I don’t know,’ Coco says. ‘I’m not sure if this is such a good idea.’
My heart is still racing, but my breathing slows. ‘There’s a category called “Private Dancers”,’ I whisper.
‘Jesus,’ Coco exhales.
My hands are shaking so much that the link opens, closes, then opens again.
I expect to see photos, videos, but there’s just another list of websites with gross names.
When I read ‘Dancing Tweens,’ I almost vomit.
I’m not sure I can do this. ‘There’s one here that she could be on,’ I tell Coco.
‘It’s called “Ballet Babes”. But I’m scared of what I might see. ’
Coco swallows, loud enough for me to hear. ‘It’s your call,’ she says softly. ‘But once you see it, you can’t unsee it.’
I take a breath and click into the website. But then I gasp so loud it’s like an inverse scream.
‘What?’ Coco asks. ‘Tell me!’
‘It’s Ella,’ I whisper. ‘There are loads of thumbnails of different girls, but the biggest picture is of her, like she’s the star or something. A porn star, like that comment says. And she’s naked.’
‘Oh my God.’
‘Well, maybe not naked,’ I stutter. ‘It’s only her top half. But there’s a slogan about clicking for a thousand more images.’
‘Eurgh, so gross. Fucking men,’ Coco spits out.
‘But there’s something even weirder about it,’ I say, my heart thudding so hard my chest hurts.
‘What do you mean weird?’
‘Ella is nineteen now, right? But in this picture, she looks younger. A lot younger. More like our age.’ Acid rears up into my mouth. I scrabble with my mouse. Click, click, click until it’s all gone and I’m back on YouTube.
‘Are you okay, Maple?’ Coco asks quietly.
‘Sure,’ I answer quickly. But I don’t dare close my eyes in case I see that image again.