Chapter Ten #2
“It’s cool, Alex.” He reached over again and brushed his fingers over her wrist this time. “I understand.” But his tone said differently. There was a thread of hurt buried deep in his words.
She flicked on the blinker at the next intersection and turned onto an unfamiliar residential side street.
It was deserted on this cold, blustery night.
She pulled to stop just outside the circle of light cast by the streetlamp.
There was enough light in the car for her to see, but they wouldn’t be seen by anyone who happened to be looking out their window.
Popping off the seatbelt, she turned toward him. He sat straight, staring out the windshield. His hands were folded in his lap, his shoulders tight. “What are you doing?” He kept his tone even, no hint of anything in this voice this time.
“Will you look at me, please?”
He turned his head toward her, but nothing else. Crap, she needed to fix this.
“You know this isn’t about you, right?” She kept her voice low, the words quiet, but made sure to fill them with truth.
He shrugged, but his shoulders remained rigid. “Whatever.” He turned back to stare out the windshield.
Ugh, she wanted to scream. Frustrating man. She drew a deep breath in through her nose and counted to five. “Nicholas Sadler, stop being a stubborn ass and look at me.”
His jaw clenched, but he undid the seatbelt and turned to face her. The shadows made it difficult to make out his expression clearly, but she could definitely see the hurt in his gaze.
She grabbed his hand and held it between both of hers. “This isn’t about you. I am not ashamed to be with you, Nick.”
He swallowed and nodded, but didn’t say anything. She took it as a sign she should probably continue, fill in some of the blanks for him.
“I just don’t want what we have to…” It was difficult to articulate what she was trying to say, what she was trying to tell him. “Dammit, this is so hard.”
He shifted his hand so he was holding hers back and gave a light squeeze. The gesture settled her, made her feel more centered.
“It’s okay.” This time he sounded more like himself. Some of the tension in her chest shifted, making it easier to breathe.
“This whole thing, whatever it is between us, is new and exciting, and I just don’t want to screw it up.”
“You’re not screwing anything up, Alex.”
She laughed, but it had a bit of a hysterical edge to it. So much for feeling more centered. “It’s just that, well, I haven’t actually been with anyone since Kevin.”
The silence stretched between them. She could tell he was doing the math in his head. Yup, it had really been almost ten years since she’d been with anyone. In the biblical sense. Heat pulsed in her cheeks and the tips of her ears. She was glad he probably couldn’t see her all that well.
He didn’t say anything, even after he’d figured out she was a born-again-against-her-will virgin. Just stared at her.
Her skin felt hot and tight, but not in the good way. Her confession had obviously changed his mind about all of this. Which, once she got past the sear of disappointment streaking through her, she would realize was a good thing.
Things with him, and her feelings for him, were already confusing enough. Sleeping with him was just going to complicate things further. And getting naked with him would only make it that much harder when he eventually went home.
She was just about to suggest he forget about the whole thing when he leaned forward. In the tight confines of the car, that put him right up in her space.
This close, she could see him clearly. The handsome lines of his face. His sensual mouth, turned down at the corners in the barest hint of a frown. His blue eyes, that looked cobalt in this light, searching her face.
“I want to kiss you.” His voice was a low rumble. “Can I kiss you, Alex?”
All the breath left her lungs, making speech impossible, so she nodded and leaned forward.
He brushed his lips against her, the barest hint of a kiss. She whimpered. It was good, but so not what she wanted, what she needed.
She felt his lips tip up in a smile against hers. And then he tilted his head and deepened the kiss. His lips were firm and demanding, his tongue brushing against the seam of her lips, requesting entry.
She moaned and opened her mouth. He slipped his tongue inside, lifted his hand to cup the back of her neck, pulled her closer.
She thrust her tongue against his, desperate to taste him.
His dark spicy flavor intoxicated her, making her feel light headed and giddy.
And so freaking hot she was ready to combust.
Suddenly, she needed to touch him, to run her hands all over him, convince herself he was real, that this was real and happening.
She climbed over the console and straddled his hips.
It was a tight squeeze, since they were both so tall, and she couldn’t sit up fully or she’d bump her head on the ceiling, but she didn’t care.
Besides, sitting up meant they wouldn’t be kissing, and that was so not happening.
He slid his hands around her waist and then down to her hips. Gripped her tight. His fingers dug into her skin. It felt so good. She shifted her hips forward, trying to get as close to him as possible.
He moaned into their kiss and slid his hands around and under her coat to grab her butt. She cursed the layers of clothing between them. Who knew she’d come to hate cotton and wool?
She rocked forward. The long, hard length of him pressed against her. She whimpered, because it felt so, so good. This time, there was no answering smirk from him.
He thrust his tongue against hers, deep and hard, searching and demanding. And she gave him back everything.
She reached down and yanked the lever on the seat. In a rush of motion, the seat slid all the way back and the seatback—which was broken years ago and could only be up or down—dropped so he was laying down with her splayed out on top of him.
He tore himself away from her lips and laughed, deep and sexy.
The sound shimmied through her, lighting up all of her nerve endings.
She planted her hands on his chest and pushed herself up to straddle him.
The console dug into her knee, but she didn’t care.
He was splayed out underneath her, her wildest fantasy come true.
His lips were swollen from her kisses, his cheeks flushed. The heat and hunger in his gaze were almost too much. Almost, but not quite. She wanted this so badly, she could hardly stand it. He kept his hands on her thighs, the heat from his palms searing. Making her ache and throb.
She reached up and frantically undid the buttons on her coat, pulling it off and tossing it into the backseat. The cool air felt amazing against her heated skin and she arched her back, rubbing herself against his hardness.
He sucked in a breath and trailed his hands up to her waist. She grabbed his wrists, slid his hands up, up, up until they covered her breasts. Her nipples hardened into tight little points. She made a pleased little mewling sound in the back of her throat. So good.
He squeezed gently a couple of times. She leaned into the touch.
He cupped the outside of her breasts, tracing his thumbs over her nipples.
She gasped and squeezed her thighs tight around his hips.
Her nipples had always been really sensitive, and even through the cotton of her t-shirt and the lace of her bra, they ached.
She grabbed the hem of her t-shirt and, without thinking too much about it, whisked it off. It got tossed into the backseat next to her coat.
“Jesus,” he said, and it was more like a whispered prayer.
Goosebumps chased themselves across her skin, but she wasn’t sure if it was because of the cool air in the car or his predatory stare. He looked like he wanted to devour her… and she was going to let him.
She rocked her hips. He groaned, the sound deep and dirty.
Everything below her bellybutton clenched, an empty ache spiraling through her.
He was wearing far too many clothes. She pushed the edges of his coat aside and trailed her hands down the hard length of his abs.
Even through his t-shirt, the defined ridges of muscle were drool inducing.
He pulled himself up into a partial sitting position, the abs under her fingers flexing and bunching. The freaking strength and control if took for him to maintain the position while he practically tore off his coat was impressive. And insanely hot.
She leaned forward and captured his lips in a scorching kiss. She thrust her tongue into his mouth, the one seeking and demanding this time. His tongue clashed with hers, all heat and deliciousness.
He broke away to yank his t-shirt off over his head and toss it into the backseat alongside her discarded clothing.
She sucked in a breath. He was glorious, but then, she already knew that.
It had taken a great deal of self-control not to drool during their training sessions.
And for the most part, all that had been on display had been his arms and shoulders.
Here, with him half naked underneath her, he was breathtaking.
His broad shoulders had a dusting of freckles on them. The previous desire to play connect the dots with her tongue welled up inside her again. She only just held back. Mainly because she loved the view and wanted to soak it all in.
And maybe do a little more than look.
She pressed her hands against his shoulders, forcing him to lay back. The seat gave a small groan. She threw a prayer out to the universe that it wouldn’t break. She waited a beat. Nothing happened. Perfect.
Time for action.