Chapter Fifteen #2
But Nick looked at her like he couldn’t get enough, like she was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.
Like he saw her and wanted her. Didn’t want her to be someone else.
Someone who wasn’t a huge disappointment to her parents for getting pregnant at sixteen.
Someone who he didn’t look at her and think this is the person that ruined my life.
Someone whose life wasn’t defined by her self-made struggles instead of her accomplishments.
He saw her, flaws and all, and he still wanted her. Not in spite of her imperfections, but because of them.
Tears burned the back of her eyes, but she blinked hard a couple of times. She would not cry and ruin this beautiful moment.
“Hey, you okay?” His voice was low, full of concern.
She met his gaze. The worry in his face nearly undid her. Her heart nearly exploded with all the emotions rioting inside her.
But she couldn’t voice them, didn’t want to talk, didn’t think words could do her feelings justice. So, instead, she rocked her hips in a long, slow glide.
He grunted and dug his fingers into the flesh of her hips, hard enough to probably leave a mark. She loved it. He breathed in, his nostrils flaring, his jaw so tense she was sure his teeth had to hurt. But there was no pressure from him. No demand they get on with it, that she satisfy him.
“I’m good,” she said, hardly recognizing her own voice. It was all breathy and low, streaked through with a sultriness she’d never heard before. Probably because she’d never felt like this before. “But we’re going to need a condom immediately.”
He stretched his arm out, reaching for the drawer of the bedside table. Kept his gaze locked on hers as he slid the drawer open and reached inside. The movement sent his erection sliding against her, making her clit tingle, streaks of desire shooting through her like stars.
She gasped and grabbed onto his waist. The muscles beneath her fingers bunched as he rummaged, and she couldn’t stop her thumbs from tracing along the defined ridges of his abs.
“I’m good. You know, down there.” Her attempt to fill the silence didn’t make her feel any less awkward. This whole thing would probably be easier if she got off of him, but honestly, she didn’t want to. “The only person I’ve been with is Kevin.”
One side of his mouth twisted into a downright dirty smirk. He pulled the silver foil packet out of the drawer, holding it aloft like he was Arthur pulling the sword from the stone. It was ridiculous and ridiculously cute.
She laughed, sliding her hands up his sides. He made a sound somewhere between a laugh and groan, and tried to squirm away.
Was he ticklish? Amusement and joy bubbled through her, making her feel light headed and floaty. It was something she hadn’t felt in a long time. A really long time.
And she liked it.
A lot.
It felt easy and right.
She continued dancing her finger over his skin, loving his reaction. The way his muscles rippled and writhed beneath her. He was seriously ticklish. And she was probably one of the only people in the world that knew it. That delighted her way more than it should.
Finally, he grabbed her hands to still her.
“Evil wench,” he said between panting breaths. The lop-sided grin on his face made her heart feel like it was filled with helium.
She laughed again and intertwined their fingers. “What can I say? I’m a woman of opportunity.”
“It’s one of your many strengths.” The look in his eyes softened to something that reminded her of tenderness. She glanced away, unable to hold his gaze when he looked at her like that.
Time to get the evening back on track.
She grabbed the condom and tore open the foil, focusing on the task to slow her racing heart.
It had been a while since she’d put one of these on—they had used one the night she got pregnant with Em but it had obviously been one of those small percentage failures—but it only took a moment for all those health class lessons to come flooding back.
She shifted, freeing his erection. He wrapped his fingers around it and held it for her as she rolled the latex over him. She’d never had more fun on a group project.
“I’m good, too. You know, down there.” There was amusement in his voice, but also something else. Something she couldn’t—or didn’t want to—define.
She looked up, her cheeks prickling. He was watching her, his blue eyes the color of the night sky in the low light. Why was it that every time she looked at him, he took her breath away?
“It’s part of my physical with the team.” He swallowed. “But I haven’t been with anyone in a long time, either.”
She cocked her head. Her thighs trembled, the burn of fatigue setting in. Even though she was in pretty good shape, her straddling-a-sex-god muscles were clearly not. So not what you should be focused on right now, Alex.
Right. “How long is a long time?”
He kept his gaze locked with hers. So freaking sexy. “A little over two years.”
She sucked in a quick breath. Not what she’d been expecting. He was a gorgeous man, a professional athlete. He probably had a whole gaggle of women throwing themselves at him at all times. The fact he hadn’t been with anyone in that long meant something.
Except, now was not the time to dissect exactly what. Now was the time for action.
“Well, then.” She wrapped her fingers around his shaft, lined it up between her thighs. He sucked in a breath. She lowered herself down a fraction of an inch. The head pressed against her opening. They groaned in unison. She pressed down a little more. “I guess I’m about to rock your world.”
The boast would have been more impressive if her voice hadn’t come out half strangled and half breathy. Did people even still say that? Had they ever said that?
He huffed out a laugh, but there was a strained edge to it. “You’ve already done so much more than that, wildcat.” He wrapped his fingers around her hips, not stopping, not rushing, just holding.
Her heart pressed up into her throat, almost choking her. Why did he have to say stuff like that? Especially now?
Unable to respond, mainly because she was afraid a sob would burst out, she focused on feeling. The firmness of his chest under the hand she was balanced on. The tickle of his chest hair against her palms. The grip of his hands on her hips.
She pressed down a little more. The pressure skittered along the edge between pleasure and pain. She sucked a breath in through her nose and pushed it out through her mouth.
“Easy,” he said. “There’s no rush.” The soft and gritty words were cracked around the edges.
She nodded, but pressed down further. Another inch slid inside. The fullness bordered on overwhelming. Her clit throbbed. She made a noise in the back of her throat. That same one she’d never made before she’d met him.
“Hold on.” He tightened his fingers. She froze.
He reached over and into the drawer of the nightstand again. The movement jostled him, the head of his erection rubbing against a sensitive spot inside her. A streak of desire shot through her, making her inner muscles clench. She moaned, the sound deep and dirty.
He hissed out a breath and pulled something out of the drawer. She stared at it for a second, until her brain kick started back into gear. Lube.
“Here.” He urged her up with the hand still on her hip.
She did as he asked and lifted herself off of him.
He popped the cap on the tube and squeezed some of the liquid into his fingers.
The process fascinated her for some reason.
Probably because she’d never had someone be so thoughtful when it came to sex and her pleasure.
The idea of better lubrication had never crossed Kevin’s mind.
He slipped his fingers between her thighs. The cool liquid on her hot flesh was a shock. She jolted, her thighs trembling. He slid his fingers between her folds, making sure to get everything nice and coated. The feeling was incredible. She couldn’t stop her hips from shifting with his movements.
And then he slid two fingers inside her. Her inner muscles squeezed tight.
“Fuck.” It was less a word and more a long breath, his deep voice gone guttural.
She closed her eyes and pushed down, forcing them deeper. The smooth glide was indescribable. It was so good, she could hardly breathe. She lifted up a little and then sunk down again, riding his fingers.
He grunted. “Jesus, that’s so hot.”
She opened her eyes and looked down.
His right hand was between her thighs, his fingers deep inside her.
His left hand was wrapped around his cock, sliding up and down in an almost hypnotic rhythm.
She couldn’t tear her gaze away. It was the hottest thing she’d ever seen.
Heat flooded her veins, tightening her muscles, making her tingle.
He pressed his fingers deeper, moving them inside her, opening her up. She groaned and pressed harder against his hand. He rocked the base of his palm against her clit.
An unexpected orgasm streaked through her. She cried out and fell forward, catching herself on her hands so she didn’t smack into him. Her thighs quivered, her inner muscles clamping down hard. Her hair formed a curtain around her. She squeezed her eyes shut as her body quaked with ecstasy.
“That’s right.” His voice was gravelly, guttural. “That’ll make it easier.”
She took a shuddering breath, and then another. The world came back into focus. She lifted her head. Tossed her hair out of the way. Stared at him.
Tension lined his jaw, small beads of sweat dotted his hairline. The way he was holding back, making sure she was good, had to be painful for him. It was so incredibly generous. Something she wasn’t used to in the bedroom.
Or, if she was being honest, outside of the bedroom.
But that was just who he was. He was kind, and caring, and giving.
And he more than deserved a little something for being so amazing.
She pushed off of him, flopping onto her back and spreading her legs. The invitation was blatant, an offer for being so incredible.