15. Hawk
“No! Stop. Just fucking stop!” I hollered, throwing my hands in the air in frustration. “What the fuck was that?”
The ringing silence that followed my question hung in striking contrast to the horrific noise that had just filled the studio where we were attempting to record something that could be called an album.
To say it wasn’t going well was a goddamn understatement.
“Get off my fuckin’ case, man,” Lewis said, rolling his eyes. “That was fine.”
“Fine?” I stared at him, my jaw rigid with tension. “Since when is fine how we do things?”
“It was how we did things on the last album, and we sold the shit out of that,” he retorted, shrugging. “Don’t know why you’re suddenly so uptight about this shit.”
“How ’bout we take a break?” Alex cut in, pushing his hand through his hair.
“That’s a great fuckin’ idea.” Lifting the strap over his head, Lewis removed his bass and set it roughly into the stand before storming toward the studio door. “I need a smoke anyway.”
After he was gone, Alex turned to me, a look of sympathy on his face.
“He’s just testing you, man.”
“Yeah, well, he needs to cut that shit out.”
“You know why he’s doing it.”
I did. He was doing it because I was still doing her.
Not that Tori and I were a thing or anything; she knew the score. I still lived my life like I always had, with eager groupies who were down to fuck wherever I went, but somehow, I had fallen into a pattern of fucking Tori more often than I would have ever imagined.
At first, it was just to piss Lewis off, which I was clearly still doing. But after a while, it stopped even being about him. It was more that she was just always there. That was a shitty thing to think, but it was the truth.
Victoria Castor was inside this crazy machine with us, and for good or bad, she knew how things worked, what was demanded of me and my time, and when I needed to let off steam.
So we fucked when the mood struck, and that was it.
Fuck, that wasn’t it for her, though.
I could see it, the looks she gave me when she thought I wasn’t watching. The way she worked extra hard to be where I was, to be standing by my side, ready to offer anything I needed, whether it was a coffee, a smoke, or her ready pussy.
The woman was at my beck and call, and I found myself taking advantage of it even when I knew I shouldn’t.
The thing was, she was comfortable, and for a lot of my life, comfort was something I was sorely lacking.
It wasn’t right, and it wasn’t fair to her, but those were the facts.
Unfortunately, Lewis didn’t seem to like the arrangement very much at all, and he was getting more and more vocal about it.
“What does he want from me, man?” I said, reaching into the mini fridge in the booth and snagging three beers. I threw myself onto the worn leather couch in the corner of the room, Alex sitting at the other end and Gavin taking up the chair across from us. “I can’t make her like him more than me. I’m not sure she likes me all that much anyway.” Taking a drink, I considered my own words. “More like she’s into the idea of me.”
“That’s probably true,” Gavin said, lifting his beer bottle in my direction. “Because the real you kinda sucks.”
I covered my smile by taking a drink and just flipped him off.
“For real though, Hawk. That woman is gonna tear this band apart.”
“Nah,” I said, but I had a sinking feeling that he might be right. “She’s harmless. Her daddy wouldn’t let her do anything to damage his cash cow. Lewis just needs to move on.”
Or I do, I added to myself.
“True, but he’s not gonna do that before we finish recording this album, so how about you keep your dicking of the boss’s daughter on the DL for a few weeks?” Alex kicked one foot up onto the coffee table as he spoke. “Really take one for the team, you know?”
“Yeah,” I said, knowing he was right.
We drank in silence for a few more minutes, waiting for Lewis to cool off enough to come back and finish today’s recording, but when the door opened and he returned, he wasn’t alone.
That was the other problem with Victoria Castor: she may have wanted me, but she loved the fact that Lewis wanted her, too.
They waltzed in the door, arm in arm, and I watched as she pawed at his chest, laughing at something he’d said like it was the funniest thing she’d ever heard in her damn life. Lewis leaned close, whispering in her ear while he threw me the evil eye, like he was winning or some shit.
But that was what he didn’t understand. To me, Tori wasn’t a competition; she was just a stop on the tour.
“Oh, hey guys,” she said, her voice low and surprised, like she was actually shocked to find us all here, in the studio.
Where we’d been every day for a month trying to put this album down.
“Hey, Victoria,” Gavin said blandly, his manners always better than everyone else’s. Alex gave her a silent chin lift, and I just stared at her, boredom painted across my entire person.
She blinked at me, her smile faltering for a second before she replaced it, even brighter than before.
“You boys just about finished here?” she asked, stepping away from Lewis and completely ignoring his frown. “I thought we could hit the town to celebrate.”
“We would be finished, but Lewis here keeps fucking messing everything up.”
Lewis scowled at me, his lips pressed into a thin line, but said nothing.
“I’m sure he’s doing a great job,” Tori replied, patting him on the shoulder awkwardly. “How many more takes do you think you’ll need?”
“One,” Lewis replied immediately, and I raised an eyebrow at him.
“You sure about that, big boy?” I asked sarcastically.
“Fucking positive.”
“Well, alright then. Let’s get this done.”
We all filed back into the studio, and with Victoria standing at the window, watching over us like a queen surveying her kingdom, Lewis played better than he had in his entire fucking life.
Later, the five of us sat around our usual table in the back of O’Reilly’s Pub, Charlie standing guard as usual, listening to some unknown band tear up the stage.
They were pretty good, actually, with hot riffs and clean transitions, their covers of some classics showing innovation and a fresh take that I normally would have appreciated.
But tonight, I was just pissed off enough to not give two shits about anything.
Fucking Lewis.
That stupid fuck had played like a fucking god the second that woman walked in the door, but he wouldn’t pull his head out of his ass for me? For us?
Didn’t he see how she was playing him? Playing all of us?
Alex was right; Victoria was going to tear us apart. And as much as Lewis pissed me off most days, he was still my friend, and we had started this band together for a reason; to get our asses out of the gutter. I wasn’t about to let some silver spoon L.A. princess mess that up for us.
Not anymore.
Looking around the table, I saw that Tori was watching me, nodding along at whatever Lewis was saying, but never taking her eyes off of me.
Fuck. I knew what I needed to do, even if I didn’t really feel like doing it.
Blowing out a breath, I finished my drink and turned to Charlie, giving him a nod, which he recognized immediately. Turning to the crowded bar, Charlie looked around for a few moments, then began moving decisively through the crowd. A few minutes later he returned with a gorgeous blonde chick, her eyes wide with shock when she realized who was sitting at the table.
“Oh em gee!” she squealed, and I tried not to cringe. “I can’t believe it’s really you. Black Kite is, like, my absolute favorite band.”
“Bet she can’t name three songs,” Alex muttered, just low enough that I didn’t think she could hear.
“Yeah?” I asked instead, reaching out a hand for her to come closer. She did, sliding herself between my spread thighs like she belonged there. “Always nice to meet a fan, baby. Why don’t you get comfortable, and I’ll buy you a drink?”
The girl giggled, plopping her bony ass down on my leg as she practically vibrated with glee. I was grateful when Charlie waved over the server and my drink was refilled. It gave me something to do while the girl rattled on and on about what the fuck ever it was she was talking about. I hummed and nodded where I thought was appropriate, the whole time watching Lewis watch Tori as she got more and more angry. I could feel her rage from across the table, the dark look in her eyes telling me she was going to make me pay.
Bring it. I was done with her and done with this dance she insisted on doing. If Lewis wanted her, the door was wide open for him. I just hoped he knew what kind of viper he was inviting into his bed.
Because Tori’s bite was pure venom.