Chapter 34
Trooper
“Good evening, sir, can I help you?” Oscar followed me to the lobby as soon as I pushed through the glass doors.
“Yeah, you can. Get the fuck outta my face.”
He looked at me like I somehow spoke a language he didn’t understand and that irritated the fuck outta me. I had very little patience for people who didn’t know how to mind their business and stay in their lanes.
“Ms. Prescott is not accepting visitors. I’ll be more than happy to leave a message.”
This muthafucker. “She’ll see me, but that ain’t none of your gotdamn business.”
“But she—”
I turned around and grabbed him by his shirt, pulling him so we were face to face. I leaned down to match his height.
His eyes stretched wide as his hands moved toward mine in an attempt to free himself from my grasp.
“You got a problem minding your own fucking business, don’t you?
Your job is to open doors and park cars, not screen my girl’s visitors.
The fuck is up with you? You living some weird ass fantasy where you think she’ll want your ol’ creepy ass?
Nah, playboy. Ain’t happening. In fact, it’s bad for your health to even think about her at all.
She don’t need a watchdog. I got her covered, and that means handling anyone I see as a threat. Are you a threat?”
“No, sir. I was just—”
“You were just minding your own gotdamn business, right?”
Nodding aggressively, he looked right at me. “Yes sir, Mr. Carter. My apologies. I’ll be minding my business from here on out.”
“Good. Glad we reached an understanding.” I shoved him back and caught the eye of Anthony who usually watched the door to her building.
He looked away and went about his business. I never had an issue with him, so I let it go, but I had a feeling this wouldn’t be the last time I had to deal with Oscar.
Something about him didn’t sit well with me. Sophie thought I was just being extra, but she was just nice. She overlooked shit I didn’t.
After my situation with Oscar, I headed to the elevator and prayed she hadn’t deactivated my key card. When I held it up and the light turned green, I smiled. Maybe I hadn’t fucked up as badly as I thought.
When I stepped off the elevator, the smell of something sweet hit me. It was the little things about Sophie I’d missed. Her place always smelled good, like flowers and fruit. She was a fanatic about that, almost obsessive.
The place was quiet, other than the TV in her room. That was the first place I checked. Her bed was empty but unmade. The bathroom door was open, so I checked there too. No luck.
I then made my way back to the living room and looked around, but didn’t see her until I stepped inside and realized she was asleep on the sofa with a blanket wrapped around her.
Damn, I’d missed her. I couldn’t even lie, and not even on some physical stuff, even though I felt my body reacting.
I just missed her. I hadn’t been sleeping well lately.
In fact, most nights I was up smoking and staring mindlessly at the TV.
It was crazy to me how everything about my life changed when she entered it.
I stood watching her for what felt like an eternity before I built up the nerve to talk to her.
Hell yeah, she had me scared to even face her.
Mostly because I was wrong for how I reacted, but also because I was afraid she wouldn’t forgive me.
I wasn’t used to fear, but when it came to Sophie, she made me hesitant about a lot of shit.
That was hard for me to accept, but she was carrying my child. I would have to get over myself.
When I was ready, I pulled the ottoman close to where she lay and sat down. I leaned down and placed my hand on her face, moving my thumb across her jawline before I kissed her forehead. Sophie’s eyes fluttered a little before they opened and she sat up quickly, almost in a panic.
Her face relaxed when she realized it was me, which gave me hope, but then the tension came. The muscles in her face tightened as her eyes grew dark.
“What are you doing here?” Her voice was low and groggy.
“We need to talk.”
She laughed sarcastically and adjusted her body before lowering her feet to the floor. I watched as she yanked the blanket to cover her body as if it wasn’t mine to see. That made me heated.
“We needed to talk two weeks ago. Since we didn’t, I don’t have anything to say.”
“Then just listen,” I said calmly, trying not to focus on the hate I heard in her tone. She was well within her rights, but that didn’t mean I was cool with it.
Women didn’t talk to me that way. Hell, no one did without consequences. But right now, I had to dial it back because I was the one who’d messed up.
“Why? There’s nothing you can say now. You made your position on my situation very clear. I don’t need an explanation, Trooper. I’m good.”
My hand moved down my face and I lifted my hat and placed it on my knee.
“Position on your situation? This isn’t a business deal. You need to relax all that.”
“I don’t need to—”
I cut her off to avoid making things worse. I didn’t want an argument. I wanted to apologize and fix things.
“You might not need an explanation, but you deserve one. I owe you that much.”
With a heavy eye roll and wave of her hand, she stared at me, waiting. As annoyed as I was, she was still cute as hell. The messy ponytail she wore with her hair falling out and her oversized T-shirt and sweats didn’t take away from that.
“If you’re going to just sit there and stare at me you can leave. You wanted me to listen. Well… I’m listening,” she snapped, making me clench my fists.
“Ay, chill with that. I know you’re pissed and hurt, but bring all that down a few.”
“You don’t get to tell me how to react, Trooper.
I’m tired of people telling me how I should feel.
You included. I don’t need that shit. What I need is for you to be the one thing in my life that just works.
Everything else doesn’t right now, yet you’re too much of a pussy to be a man,” she yelled without even flinching.
Sophie was always so poised, like there was always someone watching, so hearing her go in on me like this was funny as hell. It didn’t fit, so I felt myself smile, which she didn’t appreciate.
“Trooper, leave. Since this is funny to you, just leave. I’m not in the mood.” She jumped up and pointed to the elevator, but I got it together and grabbed her hand, which she snatched away from me.
“Ay, sit down, man. I’m sorry, and it’s not funny. I’m just not used to you talking like that.”
She glared at me for a minute before she finally sat down again.
“Look, I should have done this when you told me, but it caught me off guard. I needed time for things to sink in.”
“And you think I didn’t? That’s not an explanation. It’s an excuse, Trooper.”
“True, but it is what it is. I’m not big on lies, so I can only tell you how it really went down. I needed time to process.”
“Well, I needed you.”
I lifted my hand and gripped the back of my neck before I continued. “I know and I apologize.”
“I’m not going to make you do something you don’t want to do. There’s no point in that. Don’t worry about me. I’ll figure it out.”
“We will figure it out, Sophie,” I said, getting annoyed.
She just stared at me, not responding.
“Ay, let me explain something to you.”
She gave me a look that said continue.
“I think I’m falling in love with you and that scares the shit out of me. I’m not afraid of anything, Sophie, but this thing with you got me questioning everything about myself. It may not mean much to you, but that’s a big deal for somebody like me.”
“Think?” I saw the disappointment in her eyes, but little did she know, me even considering that was a big ass deal.
“Yes, think, and that don’t mean that I’m torn between you or someone else or not sure about you in general.
It just means I can’t say for certain because I’ve never been in love or been loved.
I’m not sure about what I’m feeling. What I know is I miss the hell outta you.
I haven’t been sleeping for shit, you’re on my mind all gotdamn day, and the second you walked out that door, I felt out of place.
I sat there for hours after you left like what the fuck am I supposed to do now?
That’s new for me. I’ve never depended on or relied on anyone, ever.
Not even Story. If he was there for me, cool, if not, I figured shit out on my own.
So, to feel like I need someone is fucking with my head.
That’s why I said think because I have no idea if what I’m feeling is love. ”
I sat there watching her watching me and got pissed because she didn’t say anything. I had just opened myself up and put everything out there, and she didn’t say shit. Not one gotdamn word.
When I couldn’t take it anymore, I just grabbed my hat, pulled it over my head, and stood. Fuck all this! She wanted to be in her feelings, even after I tried to explain. There wasn’t anything I could do about that.
“See, this is what you should have done.”
I looked back at her when I reached the elevator and waited for her to continue.
“When I walked out, like you’re doing now, you should have said ‘Sophie don’t go’. You didn’t though. You just let me leave, and that hurt.”
I released a sigh and walked back over to her. After I had her in my arms, I lowered my chin on top of her head.
“I know, and I apologize. I need you to forgive me.”
“I can do that.” Her tone changed and she actually sounded happy. “But it doesn’t fix everything. We still have a baby to consider.”
“Yeah, I know, so come on.” I led her back to the living room, and this time, took a seat on the sofa, pulling her into my lap.
It felt good to have her close again, but we still had to figure things out.
“You don’t want a baby right now, do you?” Sophie asked, looking up at me after she curved her body against my chest.
“That’s not a simple answer for me.”
Again, she was quiet.