89. Summer
Chapter Eighty-Nine
Summer
T he suite is completely empty, and I’m grateful that the tears haven’t come. I walk into my room and see the bed that I have never slept in.
I walk to it and brush my fingers along the sheets.
No doubt they are the same as the ones on his bed, but they feel different.
They feel lonely. A tear slides down my cheek and drops onto the silk, leaving a dark patch of despair.
I climb into bed and curl into a ball, leaning into the horrendous loneliness.
Was he right? Did I know what I was setting myself up for?
“Sum?” Alice’s concerned voice comes from the living room of the suite, and she comes to my room. She watches me for a moment before kicking her heels off and climbing into bed with me. She wraps around me. “I got you.”
I turn toward her and cuddle close for a moment before I realize how unfair I’m being. I pull back and wipe my tears. “Go back to the party, Al. I’m just going to order room service and watch shitty TV.”
“I’m bored with the party anyway,” she says with a careless shrug, and while I’m not convinced, it’s not because the lie is blatant.
It’s because this is the party of the year, and it is extravagant.
Alice was beyond excited about this weekend, and I know she doesn’t really want to spend it in our room.
“Really, Sum,” she says again, and I nod. Climbing out of bed, I change out of the costume and into a pair of pajamas that belong to Alice, since all my clothes are still in his closet.
When we’re back in bed, cuddled together, I order a mountain of food. We spend the evening in silence, watching a trashy show that I honestly couldn’t tell you anything about because my mind is so preoccupied with the stranger. His words circle through my mind over and over.
I am helpless against you. I will take any fucking scrap you give me.
Then why kiss me? Why do anything with me this weekend? Why give me a taste and then act like it’s nothing?
I also can’t forget the way his voice deepened when he growled mine into my lips, and how much I liked hearing it.
Did I know what I was doing? Did I know he would demand what he did?
Alice fell asleep around an hour ago, and I glance at her before climbing out of bed to push the room service cart outside and get some water.
“What are you doing here?” Rafe asks, entering the suite as I leave my room.
“I could ask you the same question,” I say, grabbing one of the glass bottles of water.
“I’m about to go meet Mira. I was just going to change into normal clothes,” Rafe says, eyeing me warily with a small frown.
Mira?.?.?. So that’s her name. “Surprised you let her out of your sight.” With the absence of a smile, the words sound sharper than I mean them to.
“You’re one to talk,” Rafe flushes a little.
I sit on the arm of the couch.
Rafe glances at the door to his room, but then walks toward me. “Why are you here alone, Sum?”
“I’m not. Alice is sleeping in my room.”
Rafe lifts an eyebrow. “You know Alice isn’t who I’m talking about.”
“Rafe,” I say, looking at him, “go get your girl.”
He hesitates for a moment, but then he moves in closer and pulls me into one of his rare hugs. I relax against him for a moment before pulling back.
“Go.”
Rafe searches my face before hurrying to his room to change, and I go back to my room.
I climb into bed beside a snoring Alice and stare at the ceiling.
My mind is busy, driven by the memories of all that has happened this weekend, and after hours of desperately hoping sleep would claim me, I finally give up and climb out of bed.
Padding back into the living room, I am drawn to the wall of windows overlooking the beach.
It is so quiet and calm as the sun starts to rise, but then I see him.
He walks somberly along the sand, still dressed in his suit from last night, and just the sight of him slams through all my barriers, flooding me with sadness, hurt, desire, and anger.
I watch him until he’s out of view, desperately holding on to the anger.
He tried to manipulate me. I was honest with him.
He knows where I stand, where I am emotionally, and he still demanded more from me than I’m ready to give.
I don’t know if I will ever be able to give him the level of commitment he wants. Not after Connor.
With a deep sigh, I settle onto the couch with the shells we collected that first day, making bracelets and trying not to allow the memories to consume me.
Once the sun has fully risen, I set the coffee to brew and head for the shower, hoping the hot water will help clear my mind and reset my mood so I can get through the day.
As I wash, a dull ache between my legs draws my attention.
Gently, I brush my fingers over my clit, frowning when I feel a small, hard ball.
It throbs sharply as I apply pressure, and I grasp it between my fingers and pull, gasping when it tugs in a deliciously painful way.
I finish my shower and turn off the water before stepping out. Going straight to the mirror, I get into a wildly indecent position to look between my legs, gaping when I see the small metal ball above my clit. The fucker pierced me. I growl in both annoyance and frustration. Why would he do this?
Now that I have discovered my new piece of jewelry, I am hyperaware of it and how it rubs against my panties as I pour myself a cup of coffee. I manage to let Alice sleep for another thirty minutes while I fester, but I can’t stand the silence that leaves me with way too much time to think.
“Al, come with me to the beach?” I say, bursting into my bedroom.
“Huh?” Alice says, still mostly asleep.
“The beach. Let’s get good loungers! Come on. This is our last morning here.”
Alice groans. “Did you sleep at all?” she asks, but she does sit up, trying to focus.
“Come on! We need to go,” I say. I’ve been stuck with my thoughts for too long and I need to just go somewhere and distract myself.
Alice blinks her eyes open, groaning when she sees I’m already dressed for the beach in a gold bikini.
She grumbles but climbs out of bed to get dressed.
Not even twenty minutes later, we’re stepping onto the sand, though I’m practically dragging Alice.
We choose our loungers, and she flops onto hers.
She’s barely flat before she’s asleep again.
There goes my distraction.
I lie back on my lounger, annoyed at my lack of a phone.
It would be nice to just scroll through socials and get lost in someone else’s drama, but then I remember the book I brought.
I pull it out of my bag and start reading, letting myself get lost in another realm.
When Alice wakes an hour later, I’ve managed to immerse myself deep enough into the story that I’ve only thought of the stranger every three minutes.
“We should go for breakfast and check on Rafe. Make sure he’s still alive and not in a sex coma,” Alice says through a big yawn.
I lower my book to answer her, but instead, my eyes lock with the -stranger’s.
He is just down the beach, seeming just as surprised to see me as I am to see him.
He looks tired, no doubt a mirror to me.
His gaze is so intense that my stomach twists, and he watches me for a long moment, deciding what he wants to do next.
He starts toward me, and I sit up a little, watching as he approaches me.
I push my sunglasses to the top of my head as he towers over me.
He holds his hand out to me silently. My anger swells again as I look at his hand, wondering what stipulations come with this minor contract.
He doesn’t move. He just waits, and I glance at Alice, who is watching us carefully.
She arches a brow at me, silently asking me if I want her to stay.
I shake my head and look back up at the stranger.
Why have I missed him?
Alice quietly leaves, and I wait until she’s out of earshot before I speak.
“Does this mean I can’t hold anyone else’s hand ever again?” I ask sharply.
His shoulders tense. “Princess,” he warns, and I glare at him before placing my hand in his. He helps me up and then leads me down the beach to a more secluded area, and for some reason I don’t really understand, I follow behind him.
When we’re alone, he turns to face me. “I know,” he says, not even waiting for me to yell at him. “I am possessive and extremely jealous when it comes to you.”
“You’re also an asshole,” I say, not shrinking under his gaze. “To imply that you would have been happy to hang out with me this weekend. That we?.?.?.” I shake my head. “Only because you’re unable to deny me. That was cruel. ”
He holds my gaze, searching, regret flashing in his eyes. “I am unable to deny you. I am desperate for everything that has to do with you. But you’re right. The blame is mine, not yours,” he says, cupping my cheek.
“It’s not about blame,” I say with a frown, not used to him being reasonable.
“No?” He strokes my cheek with his thumb.
“It’s about accepting the fact that we both wanted it and not saying that you only did what you did because I wanted it.
That it was one-sided,” I say, but I’m not done.
“It’s about accepting the fact that you are asking me to commit to a faceless male.
It’s about the fact that my fiancé isn’t even dead six months. ”
He winces with every point I throw at him, but I don’t back down.
“When it comes to you I know I can be unreasonable,” he grates out.
I exhale heavily, appreciating his acceptance of that fact. “Well, so am I when it comes to you,” I relent.
He frowns a little and slides his fingers into my hair, pulling me to him. I place my hands on his chest, feeling his heart thud beneath my palm. He closes his eyes and nuzzles the top of my head, inhaling me, and then he kisses the tip of my ear, which makes me shiver.
“Stranger . . .”
He bites my ear. “Hm?”
“Stranger . . .” I moan.
He groans and pulls back. “Sorry.”
I brush my fingertips over his lips. “These aren’t yours,” I whisper. “I can tell already.”
He nips the pads of my fingers, drawing another moan from me.
“Princess,” he says, his voice deep with desire, turning my insides to liquid. “I’m having trouble remembering the reasons I shouldn’t kiss you again.”
I watch him, but his dark eyes remain on my lips. “Because these are not your lips,” I say. “And because I’m not ready to make the commitment you need.”
He groans and lifts me into his arms.
“Where are we going?” I ask, wrapping my legs and arms around him.
“I don’t know,” he says, leaning in to press kisses along my throat.
“Checkout is in three hours,” I say, tipping my head for him.
“And I want every perfect second with you.”