Chapter Eleven
Harrison
A couple of weeks later, I was leaned back in a chair in my frat room.
Aubrey was straddling me and bouncing up and down on my dick, but I found myself distracted.
Yet again, I was having a hard time getting off.
I could tell Aubrey was both confused and irritated.
We’d been together a handful of times, and none of them had been very good.
She seemed into it, but I wasn’t. I moved my hand down to her clit and massaged it.
At least I could get her off, even if I still wasn’t close.
She loved it, moaning and crying out as she came quickly.
What was wrong with me? I had a beautiful, sexy woman willing to fuck me whenever I wanted, but I couldn’t relax. I couldn’t just enjoy it. I clenched my jaw, thinking about my sweet Sadie. She wasn’t likely to be mine for much longer if I didn’t do some serious damage control.
And things hadn’t turned out like I’d thought they would.
I’d thought I’d get so much relief from fucking Aubrey that cheating on Sadie would be almost worth it.
It wasn’t. The sex with Aubrey had remained…
just okay. Yes, there were some things I’d learned from her that Sadie and I had never done.
But mainly it was just fucking. Mediocre fucking.
With Sadie, I’d felt like every bit of me was involved during sex…
my body, my mind, my heart. With Aubrey? It was just my body. That was it.
I’d built up the idea of sex with Aubrey to be this amazing thing in my head. The reality was nowhere near what the fantasy had been. The truth was that sex was better with Sadie. Much better.
I closed my eyes and pretended it was Sadie riding me.
My God. My dick immediately swelled, getting much harder.
Aubrey made little moans of appreciation, not having a clue it had nothing to do with her.
I pictured Sadie’s big, round tits bouncing up and down in my face.
I imagined getting to hold them, lick them, suck her pretty, rosy nipples while she rode my cock.
That did it. I threw back my head and yelled out my pleasure, having to bite my lip to keep from calling out Sadie’s name.
“Baby,” Aubrey said, leaning in and kissing me passionately. “That was amazing.”
My phone buzzed, and I turned my head away from her, trying to see the name on the screen. She pulled my chin back around and kept trying to kiss me. She liked to do this after sex, but I wasn’t into it at all.
With Sadie, I would cuddle all night every night. Aubrey? I wanted her gone as soon as I came. That sounded awful, but it was true.
My phone buzzed again, and I lifted Aubrey from my lap. “I need to get rid of this,” I gestured to the condom. I grabbed my phone and headed to the bathroom.
“What do you need your phone for in there?” she asked.
I pretended not to hear her as I closed the door behind me and stared down to see a text from Sadie.
Sunshine: We need to talk.
Well, fuck. Those were four words you never wanted to hear from your girlfriend. A horrible thought went through my mind. Did she know somehow?
My hands shook as I took care of the condom and washed my hands.
Then I scrolled up and looked at my pitiful text thread with Sadie.
I winced as I saw just how many texts of hers had gone unanswered.
That didn’t even count the missed phone calls.
She’d left multiple voicemails I hadn’t bothered to answer.
At first, I’d been so obsessed over the idea of sex with Aubrey I hadn’t been interested in talking to Sadie.
Then, after I’d cheated, I felt too guilty to talk to her.
I had lost my mind over the past few weeks, and I was about to have to pay for it.
We need to talk. Ominous words with a stark delivery. Sadie never sent such short, blunt texts.
I splashed some water on my face and stared at myself in the mirror. What had happened to me? I had well and truly fucked up. I was so glad summer was almost over.
I wanted to put all of this with Aubrey behind me and get back to what was real and good. I wanted to put all my focus into football and Sadie. And that was it.
Me: When will you be back on campus?
Sunshine: I’ll text you when I’m ready to meet up.
Well, that didn’t really answer the question. Was she back and just didn’t want to see me?
Me: Are you already back?
I saw the three dots appear and disappear, but she didn’t leave another message.
Me: Sadie? Are you back on campus now?
Nothing.
If she was back, she didn’t want me to know. I scrubbed a hand over my face. I knew one thing.
I had to end things with Aubrey.
***
The next afternoon after practice, I texted her to come see me. Within seconds, she’d responded saying she was on her way over. When she got there, she entered my room without knocking. That’s how comfortable she was, how secure she felt about my feelings for her.
I wasn’t sure why. She’d begged to see me every night since the first night we’d gotten together. I’d only taken her up on it six times.
And that had been six too many.
“Hey, baby,” she said, a big smile on her face. “What do you want to do tonight? Do you want me to invite a couple of girls over?” She waggled her eyebrows while I tried not to vomit. She was always trying to talk me into group sex, but I’d withstood that temptation at least.
“No. We need to talk.”
I saw a flash of uncertainty cross her face, but she quickly recovered. “Sure.”
I stood while she sat. I had too much nervous energy.
Now that I thought Sadie might already be back in town, I was afraid she might just drop in and see me with Aubrey.
That would not be good. I winced inwardly when I thought about Aubrey’s distinctive pink Jeep.
There was no mistaking it. If Sadie had driven by the fraternity house and seen it parked out front, she would know I was hanging out with Aubrey.
Shit. I ran a hand through my hair.
“What’s wrong?” Aubrey said. “You seem stressed.” She got a glimmer in her eyes and looked at me flirtatiously. “I can help you with that.”
“No,” I held up a hand. “That’s the last thing I want right now.”
She looked a little hurt, but I didn’t care.
I didn’t know how to say any of this in a way that wouldn’t hurt her feelings, so I finally just went for it. “Look, Sadie is coming back to town. This thing between us has to end, okay?”
She looked shocked, then mad. “It’s not okay,” she said, frowning.
I ran another hand through my hair, not caring if it messed it up or not. “I don’t know why I formed it like a question. What I meant is that you and I are over. Done. We can still be friends, but that’s it.” I was full of shit. I had no intentions of remaining friends with her.
“You’re dumping me for little miss perfect?”
“Dumping you? We were never together. It was just sex, right?”
She looked genuinely confused. “What about all those dinners? We ate lunch together all the time, walked everywhere across campus together, studied together, got coffee each morning… you see where I’m going with this, right?”
Damn. When she said it like that, it did seem like we’d been together. I thought back over the past few months. Aubrey had been more like my girlfriend than Sadie had. My heart started to pound. No wonder Sadie had been upset. What had I been thinking?
But I knew what I’d been thinking. I was curious. I wanted to try new things, and Aubrey had been up for anything. And she made sure I knew it. I betrayed Sadie for this girl. Sadie, who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
I’d been thinking with my dick, not my brain.
“I’m sorry,” I said sinking down on my bed. “I never meant to make you think we were dating. You and me…” I looked up and met her eyes. “We were just physical. Sex only. I’m not in love with you, and I don’t think you’re in love with me, either.”
“So, what are you saying?”
“We can’t see each other anymore. Sadie can’t find out the truth about us. Ever. Do you understand?”
“Oh, I understand.” She had a sly look on her face. “I’ll stay away from you, and I won’t tell your little girlfriend about us.”
I breathed a sigh of relief. “Great. Then I guess we’re done here…”
“But I want something.”
Uneasiness washed over me. “What do you mean?”
“I know you got a crap ton of NIL money when you agreed not to enter the transfer portal.”
“So?” I asked warily.
“I want implants.” She gestured to her breasts. “I want double Ds.”
I chuckled. She was bold, I’d give her that. “Yeah, I’m not using any of my money to get you breast implants.”
Rage flashed across her face for a moment, before she pushed it back down. “Then I guess you’d better get ready for Sadie to hear the truth about you.”
“That’s blackmail,” I scoffed. “It’s illegal.”
She shrugged. “Only if I’m caught. And right now? It’s just your word against mine.”
A cold chill ran down my spine. Aubrey’s mask was starting to slip. Now, I was seeing the nasty person Sadie had warned me about all along. I wished I’d listened.
“Go ahead and try it. Sadie loves me, and she’s trusting. She’s not going to believe you over me.”
She stood up. “Oh, I wouldn’t count on that. Your precious Sadie isn’t stupid.” She waved and walked out.
I hurried after her and grabbed her arm, pulling her back against me. I leaned in and whispered in her ear. “If you tell Sadie about us, believe me, you’ll regret it.”
She jerked her arm away and stared up at me, fear in her eyes.
Jesus. I wasn’t going to hurt her, but I realized now how my words sounded.
“You’re going to be the one with regrets.” She gave me a cold smile, turned on her heel, and sped down the stairs away from me.
Her parting words left me so nervous I was almost queasy. Would Aubrey really say anything? If she did, I hoped Sadie would still believe me over Aubrey. I hated lying to her, but in this case it was necessary. I didn’t want to lose her. Sadie and I were meant for each other.
And I had never wanted to live a life without Sadie. I always knew I’d come back to her. Aubrey was a girl you fuck around with; Sadie was who you married. I was done with Aubrey or anyone besides Sadie. Easy, meaningless sex hadn’t turned out to be what I’d wanted at all.
I just hoped I hadn’t realized that too late. I needed to make sure Sadie knew how much I loved her.
And she could never find out about what had happened between Aubrey and me.