41. Thea
Thea
Why Date a Ladder When You Can Topple the Whole Damn Tower
I’ve been dragging my feet. I know I should have gone to see Professor Tennant as soon as I got the bracelet and necklace last week.
But even still, I’m terrified of putting it on.
I could barely try it on without having a panic attack.
But I’d managed. After reliving the memory last night, feeling the suffocating grip of the real shackles again, I know I can’t let myself go back to that place.
I have to stop it from happening again. After everything I’ve been through, I know I’m strong enough to handle wearing a bracelet.
I step into Tennant’s office, and she greets me with a warm smile. “Did you find replacements?”
I nod, handing her the bracelet and the necklace. She quickly adds a charm to the necklace, ensuring it will make me immune to any other jewelry, then begins working on the bracelet.
It takes her a few minutes to make the changes, comparing the fake bracelet on my wrist with the new one.
I take a deep breath. The cool metal feels wrong in my hand, overflowing with memories I don’t want to revisit.
Slowly, I slide it on my wrist. The moment it touches my skin, something inside me flinches.
Hard. I can’t do this. I yank the bracelet off, my hands shaking.
Panic grips me, sudden and sharp. My breath comes in quick, shallow bursts I can’t control.
I take one step back. Then another. I turn, desperate to escape.
I run and don’t stop. Even when I hear Tennant’s voice, calling after me, I don’t look back.
I find myself in the dining hall, unsure when I got here, or when I grabbed this slice of unappealing pizza.
I don’t even notice Benson until he slides into the seat across from me, his usual grin spread across his face.
“Still not eating, huh?” he says taking a big bite of his shepherd’s pie.
I give him a half-hearted smile. “Not hungry,” I mutter. “Just… thinking.”
He doesn’t push me. Instead, he glances at the food in front of me, then at me. “I’ve seen you devour a whole plate of fries in less time than it takes me to finish a sentence. What’s going on?”
“You ramble.” I shrug but the smile is fake. “I guess I’m not in the mood for anything today.”
“Alright. Fair enough.” He smiles mischievously and reaches forward, stealing my pizza and eating the whole thing in two quick bites.
“Hey!” I yell at him. “That was mine.”
“You weren’t eating it,” he tells me with a smile, glad to have gotten a rise out of me.
“I thought you were a human sandwich, not a damn garbage disposal!”
He doesn’t laugh, he reaches out and grabs my hand.
“Want to talk about it?” he asks.
I wrinkle my nose.
“What’s this?” Anita’s shrill voice cuts through the hum of conversation as she stands over our table. Benson jerks his hand from mine as Sloane and Mavis fall into formation behind her.
“It looks like… dinner?”
“Seriously, how low have you sunk? You went from Zair, to shadow boy, to this goblin in a couple weeks. Did I miss when you fucked a cur?” Her voice curls with disgust, loud enough to offend every shifter. A hush spreads through the dining hall as they all hear the slur.
“It’s called being friends, Anita. Not everything is about sex and power.”
“Whatever,” she scoffs. Then moves on to the next thing on her list. “I just came by to see if you needed any comfort after your spectacular failure in your pursuit of Zair. Everyone’s talking about how pathetic you are.”
“Was I pursuing Zair?” I ask innocently. “Well, I’m sure there are lots of things I fail at that I was never trying to accomplish. Like pretending to care about this asinine conversation.”
“Anything is better than a goblin. Seriously Thea, how low are your standards?”
“Obviously higher than yours if all you care about is climbing the ladder, not who’s holding it.”
She switches tactics. “Ethan asked about you. Said he wanted to hook up again. He’s a much better option than this goblin, he actually has a brain and a future.
More than lifting heavy stuff or smashing things.
Plus, with their disgusting throuples, you wouldn’t just be stuck with him.
You’d be stuck with two of them.” Her glance at Benson comes with a shudder. “Ick.”
She lets the insult hang, expecting silence or shame.
I lean back in my seat, slow and casual.
“Tell Ethan I’m fucking the goblin.” The words drop like a stone in a pond. I watched as her face turns from shock to outrage. “Big step up from that weak-willed witch.”
“The weakest witch is still better than a chainborn!” Her face is an ugly sneer.
“Oh and don’t forget to remind him everyone knows goblins have big dicks,” I say with a saccharine smile.
Benson’s hand flies to his mouth as Anita’s expression freezes between disbelief and horror.
A ripple of snickers spreads through nearby tables. Anita’s face goes scarlet.
“What?” I ask like I’d just mentioned the weather.
“You’re disgusting,” she spits.
“Disgusting? Oh no, sweetheart.” My voice drips with honeyed mockery. “I just have standards. And I’m thrilled to report that Benson here exceeds them. They don’t call him the human sandwich because he’s a pickle.” Benson chokes on a laugh as I give him a wink.
That’s the breaking point. The cafeteria erupts into laughter. I gesture toward Benson with exaggerated flair. “Why do you think he’s such a good goalie? Have you seen the size of those hands?”
Anita’s on the edge, her body trembling with anger.
“You do realize goblins are below beasts, right?” she sneers. “They’re so backwards, even their women chose extinction over breeding with them. What does that say?”
Gasps stop the laughter. Followed by low growls rising from some of the shifters. Benson stiffens beside me. The entire cafeteria holds its breath. The words hang there, filthy and sharp.
“If goblin women died out,” I say, slow and cold, letting the words travel around the dining hall. “It wasn’t for lack of love. It was the world that failed them, not their men. Goblins are everything you’re not: loyal, honest, kind. I have more faith in any goblin than I’ll ever have in you.”
“They’re disgusting, Thea!” she screams.
I have an idea. It’s reckless. Petty. Dangerous.
“No one could love them!”
Fuck it.
I’m doing it anyway.
I grab Anita’s wrist.
She flinches, caught off guard, eyes flicking down in shock.
“Enjoy,” I say, and let the curse wrap its way around her. The air thickens with the scent as a mark appears on her forearm; A heart with crossed hammers.
“Benson!” Anita calls, stumbling toward him. She tries to climb into his lap. He shoves her off and she lands on her ass with a yelp.
“Please let me love you,” she sobs. “You’re so handsome, and the best soccer goalie in the whole world! I love you, let me kiss your feet. I’d die happy just touching your shoes!”
The cafeteria erupts in laughter.
Benson looks her right in the eye, I see her looking at him with love and hope. “No, you’re disgusting.”
The moment he says it, she stiffens. The curse snaps and then resets.
“What’ve you done to me?” Anita yells, her eyes darting around the room.
Big mistake.
Her eyes land on a blue-haired goblin and it starts over again.
“Please,” she whimpers, crawling toward him, before clutching at his pant leg. “I’d do anything for you, I want to have blue-haired babies. Please let me love you.”
He steps away. “You’re disgusting.”
Again.
And again.
Sloane and Mavis grab her under the arms, dragging her toward the exit as she shouts clumsy love poetry at the nearest goblin.
The moment she’s gone, the cafeteria claps. I sink into my seat, heart hammering.
“Too far?” I ask Benson quietly.
He leans forward, arms resting on the table. “What if one of them… doesn’t reject her?”
“They can’t,” I say. “It’s in the curse. She’ll be rejected every time.”
He watches Anita through the doors, then looks at me.
“You’re terrifying,” he says with a crooked smile, then adds softly, “Thank you.” We sit in silence for a moment before he says, “Did you have to tell everyone I’m packing?”
“You’re not?” I tease, finally cracking a genuine smile.
“You’re unbelievable.” He laughs, leaning back in his seat and crossing his arms. “Zair is going to kill me.”
“Why would Zair kill you?” I ask, confused.
Benson shakes his head, still grinning. “Because now everyone’s going to think you’re with me and for… well, those reasons.”
I cock an eyebrow, feigning curiosity. “What do you mean by ‘those reasons’?”
“You know,” he says, motioning vaguely toward himself. “The whole… well-endowed goblin thing.” He chuckles, and I can’t help but laugh too.
“Oh, please,” I smirk. “As if Zair doesn’t already know you’re a catch. You just went from ‘suspiciously quiet goalie’ to ‘legendary love machine’ in less than ten minutes. I bet you’ll have the human sandwich in no time. The real question is, will you be the bread or the filling?”
He groans, leaning forward, head in his hands. “I hate you. You’re the worst.”
“You love me and I’m the best,” I joke. “Bet you’re wishing you sat anywhere else.” I smirk as Mavrik walks over with his tray of food.
“I don’t know, I hear this table can make a man,” Mavrik jokes and I scoot over to let him sit beside me.
“Benson, do you know Mavrik?” I ask.
“You’re the shadow weaver, right?” Benson tips two fingers in greeting.
“Damn those are some big hands,” Mavrik jokes and I see Benson blush. I reach over and steal a few of Mavrik’s fries.
“Hey!” he complains.
“Benson stole my pizza.” I turn and look at him. “You owe me pizza, good pizza!”
We all fall into easy conversation, despite everything that’s happened to me. This second chance… it feels amazing. Like even if I don’t find Lazlo, I’ve found something more important: myself.
He gave this to me. And for the first time in a long time, I don’t feel lost.