Chapter 22
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Kim
I’m tired tonight. Lifting the broiler pan into the overhead cabinet, I shut the door and get down from the step stool.
The cleanup has nothing to do with my lack of energy.
Plenty of the party stragglers jumped in to get it done.
What I am tired of, is thinking. I’m drained worrying about the leavings.
Landon from Smyrna, Hunter from school. They circle each other in my mind.
The ground I stand on feels shaky. Is there going to be an earthquake that takes down what I have built, or are the Earth’s plates going to settle? Only my heart is steady. My heart. Why can’t things be simple?
“Come on. We’re going for a ride.”
Landon takes me by the shoulders, rescuing me from my thoughts and leading me out of the kitchen.
“Wait! I need to put away the rest of the pans!”
“Get the hell out,” Lex says, hands deep in soapy water. “Bing and Hunter are going to dry the rest of these. Get over here!” he yells in the general direction of Ronnie’s TV.
“Just a minute! We’re playing blackjack!”
The boys are not warming to the idea of being productive. They don’t give a flip that Lex used his deep voice for the command.
“Hunter. Get up. Go help Lex.”
Reluctantly he listens to me. As he passes, I hand him the kitchen towel and give the look.
“I’m going.”
Bing decides not to let his friend take the hit alone, stands and joins him.
“Grab the blanket,” Landon says as we pass the quilt folded on the ledge. I scoop it up.
Ronnie, Layton, and Holly sit talking on the porch as we walk out.
“You changed into the caftan!” I say, eyeing the royal blue print.
“Of course. Thank you, honey. I love it.”
“It looks good!”
The men smoke Havanas somebody gave for a birthday gift. Holly doesn’t seem to be bothered by the aroma. Her feet are propped on the low table and she’s having birthday cake. The Galaxie sits center stage in front of the house. Outdoor lights where the road meets the field spotlight its beauty.
Landon calls his father out. “Are you supposed to be smoking?”
“Piss off.”
“See how quickly he forgot who gave him a car today?”
Layton weighs in. “That’s gratitude for you.”
“I haven’t forgotten. Where you two going?”
“For a ride. Hey Dad, can I take the car?”
Chuckles. He digs in his pocket and tosses the keys to Landon.
“This is a privilege. Don’t abuse it.”
Ronnie takes a drag and blows a stream of smoke above his head. He stretches his legs under the table, looking like the Grand Poobah of the house. And he is of course.
We take the steps down, and he comes around the passenger side to open my door.
“That’s what he used to say when I wanted to borrow any of his cars.”
I toss the quilt in the back.
“Thank you, kind sir.”
“That’s my boy!” Ronnie calls. “Elegance.”
Landon laughs. By the expression it’s a private joke between father and son.
Closing the door, he goes around back and gets in.
“Ready?”
“Let’s escape the bonds of Earth. I need to tonight.”
He looks at me and it feels like we both know what it is to be losing the beginning of us.
The prologue is ending and it feels a little scary.
This is real life now. There’s not a couple on earth who have been able to freeze the first days.
When nothing came between you. The space where all things around you fade.
Except him. Except her. And if we could, what would we miss? All things move forward.
He takes the frontage road out and toward the highway. I wrap my hair in my hand and feel the night’s breeze against my face.
“Where are you taking me?”
“To one of my old teenage hangouts. Want to park and make-out?”
“Yes. But I’m not going to go all the way,” I tease.
“We’ll see.”
The rest of the drive is quiet. Neither wants to break the silence.
We don’t even listen to the music that always accompanies us.
The night is perfect as is. Stars clearly visible in the sky, little traffic.
The temperature is warm for ten. His hand reaches for mine, and fingers braid. I hold him against me.
Taking the exit, we head up a winding road. City lights start to twinkle through the trees. The Galaxie rides smooth. I feel like I am in a nineteen-sixty-three Ford commercial. Handsome spokesman and his woman taking the new model for a spin.
He slows and takes a left onto a dirt road leading through a grove of trees. It is darker here. Only the headlights illuminate the way.
“This is kind of spooky!”
He squeezes my hand and lets go to take the wheel.
“I’ll save you from the boogeymen.”
One more twist through the trees, and we come to a clearing on the edge of the hill. A wide view of the city is revealed.
“Good. No one is here,” Landon says, pulling to a stop and putting it into Park.
“Oh! This is beautiful.”
I lift out of my seat and take a good look at the twinkling lights. He pats my behind three times. I turn.
“Did you ever have sex here? I mean in high school.”
“No. Not that I didn’t try. I had a bad blow job once though. Does that count?”
I take my seat. “I thought there was no such thing. Isn’t every blow job good?”
“That is a myth. Some women don’t know how to love a dick. Not like you treat mine.”
“I’m not much in the mood tonight. Even though this would be the perfect setting.”
He doesn’t protest or try to convince me otherwise. “It’s a good spot for talking too.”
Now he has my attention. I meet his stare, and smiles break out on both our faces.
“What are we smiling at exactly?”
A sigh escapes his perfect lips. “I’m smiling because you’re sitting next to me. There isn’t a lot to be happy about otherwise.”
I move as close to him as possible, leaning over the console. A hand goes around my shoulder, and we look out over the city. I speak first.
“I hate that you’re leaving Smyrna. There I said it. Even though I know it doesn’t change how we feel about each other. I absolutely hate it. And the worst part? I understand it has to be that way.”
“I hate it too.”
“I can’t figure out who to be mad at.”
I sit up and angle to him.
“Hear me out. We can have weekends together a couple times a month. And you can come here when you can. I love you so much and believe we can do it. Hunter is at a crossroad right now, and he isn’t quite a man.
He has no money, no direction and he doesn’t seem to be too upset about it.
Do you get why I would be in emergency mode? ”
“Of course I do.”
“Do you think I’m hovering?”
“I know nothing about raising a child. Especially a six foot tall one.” There is a pause. “I’m interested in learning though.”
He is genuine and it moves me. I touch his arm.
“They never grow up, Landon. Not as you think. It’s a lifetime commitment.”
If that doesn’t turn him off nothing will.
“So I’ve heard. Dad would agree with you.”
“Hunter is a good kid. Man. Kid. It’s in a state of flux. He has heart and he’s smart and hard working. But you get that first taste of freedom and all you want to do is fuck around. Because you can.”
“He’s just young.”
“That excuse has an expiration date.”
He chuckles at my assessment.
“It’s true!”
I’m chuckling too, mixed with a mother’s fear.
“He might think not having to go to school is going to be a free pass. He hasn’t said as much, but I’m afraid of the possibility.”
“I don’t think you should assume the worst.”
I sit with the idea.
“Maybe he’ll find work. Or he might decide the work he can get at this stage isn’t what he wants to do again.
If ever there was a time in life to be unsure and experiment, it’s when you’re nineteen, Kim.
Life doesn’t have to be figured out by then.
He just needs a job so he can find out what a forty-hour week looks like. That’s the lesson there.”
I lean in and rest my head on his shoulder.
“I built him a nest here. But I don’t want to push him out before he knows how to stand on his own.”
He has the strangest look on his face.
“Birds and children fly away. We did, you and I.”
I rest in the words and think about the cycle of life. Landon breaks the silence.
“I was talking to my father today. Like one of our old deep dives.”
“What about?”
“The important stuff. Love. Kids. Choices.”
“Did you come to any conclusions? Tell me so I can know how to navigate my life too.”
“I think I have figured a way through this.”
“Really?”
I sit up.
“We love each other,” he says.
“I thought you knew that.”
“I’m not finished. Here’s the problem as I see things. I need to go back to Memphis for the next six months. At the minimum. You want to be sure Hunter is moving forward and not sitting on his ass in Smryna.”
“That’s about it.”
“What if I hired Hunter to work for me? We worked good together at Dad’s.
I could teach him. He’d stay at my place for free, so he could learn to save a little.
And we’d get to know each other. He’d be living with his boss, so he couldn’t call in sick.
But I’d be living with my girlfriend’s son, so I couldn’t be a complete dick to the kid. ”
I’m stunned into silence at first.
“You’d be willing to do that?”
He nods and takes my face in his hands.
“But when the job ends, we’re coming back to Smyrna.”
Tears glisten in his eyes. I respond with my own and add a quivering lip.
“For good? Oh my God. Really, Landon?”
He lifts my chin.
“There’s work here for me. Layton knows I’m good at what I do. He told me a while back, I’d have all the work I could handle. I can live at Dad’s, rent out the Memphis house and build equity. Everything I love is here.”
“I think you’re a genius.”
He smiles with a kind of pride and look of confidence.
“You know we can take whatever life throws at us. Right?”
I match his confident expression.
“Right.”
“Let’s always keep that attitude. We’re badasses, you and me. I mean come on, we’ve already dealt with a fucking heart attack, a serial rapist, a home robbery, and your kid being drugged and conned by two women.”
We speak at once.
“And it’s only been three months.”
Laughing, my hand reaches back and pulls the quilt to the front seat. I open my door, set a foot on the ground and look back to his smiling face.
“Wanna end your losing streak.”
His smile answers.
Out of my peripheral vision a shooting star streaks across the sky, marking the moment.