Chapter 7
CHAPTER SEVEN
the green monster
MATTY
Why are women so damn confusing?
After that kiss, I thought things between us would be different, but Blair may as well be a professional athlete when it comes to this game of hot and cold she’s been playing. When she’s hot, one touch can burn me alive, and when she’s cold, a single look can give me frostbite.
There’s no in between.
It feels as if I’m suddenly competing in an extreme sport without the requisite training or preparation, not even knowing whether we’re teammates or adversaries. It’s equal parts frustrating and thrilling. It’s also fucking exhausting.
The dull roar of chatter emanating from the dining hall increases in volume as I draw closer, my stomach gurgling at the prospect of a solid meal.
I didn’t realize I worked through lunch today until it was too late.
Giving Blair space seemed like the right move, but there’s such a thing as being too intently focused on work.
Throwing myself into my tasklist was the only way to keep from obsessing over our interaction this morning. I had to actively force myself not to look at Blair, not to think about her, all while she was sitting right across from me. Talk about torture.
Despite the fact that it’s closing soon, the dining hall is still relatively busy when I stride through the open doorway.
I’m halfway across the room when I hear my name being called over the sounds of rumbling voices and clattering silverware, glancing in the direction it came from to find Gia beckoning me with a wave.
I don’t know why I hesitate before pivoting her way.
Gia doesn’t hide the fact that she’s interested in me or play a grueling game of hot and cold.
Things would be a whole lot easier if she was the girl I’m hung up on, but I guess I must be some sort of masochist because I’ve only got eyes for the one who said kissing me was a mistake and swore it won’t happen again.
It sure didn’t feel like a mistake in the moment. No part of that kiss felt like she didn’t want it just as much as I did, and there’s only so much we can tiptoe around this smoldering sexual tension before it catches fire again.
Gia’s seated at a table with a few friends, all of whom pause to glance up curiously as I approach. “Wanna join us?” Gia asks hopefully, tapping a palm against the bench beside her in invitation.
“Wish I could,” I sigh, reaching behind my head to rub the tight muscles at the base of my neck. Occupational hazard. “I’ve still got work to finish up, so I’m just grabbing some food to take back to the command center.”
Gia’s friends apparently lose interest in our interaction, resuming their own conversation while she swivels my way and kicks a leg over the bench to straddle it.
“Again?” she whines, dropping her palms to the bench and shifting forward in a seductive lean, pouting her lower lip.
“But it’s Friday! I thought you were gonna try to come out to the bar tonight since you missed last week. ”
If I dropped my gaze, I’d see straight down her shirt.
“I know, but duty calls,” I reply apologetically, keeping my eyes up.
She huffs out a breath that ruffles the chocolate strands of hair framing her heart-shaped face. “When are they gonna give you a break?”
“I don’t mind, really,” I shrug. “I like work.”
“Ew, why?” she scoffs, scrunching her nose.
I open my mouth to respond but quickly close it again, knowing any explanation I give her won’t resonate. The fact that she just asked that question tells me she doesn’t get it.
Blair does. She never bats an eye about staying late, knowing that what we’re doing every day in the command center matters.
We’re dismantling the last dredges of The Guild piece by piece, saving the lives of countless shifters by blocking any means of them reassembling.
This job has given me a sense of purpose, and being good at it makes it enjoyable.
I can tell it’s the same for Blair. She throws herself into her work just as much as I do because it distracts us from the reasons why we’re here in the first place, chasing redemption and revenge. We’d both rather forget than feel.
I just shrug in answer to Gia’s question, realization finally dawning as to why I can’t seem to go after the girl who likes me back rather than chasing the one who keeps pushing me away. Gia’s great, but she doesn’t get me. Not like Blair does.
“Can’t you get out of it?” she presses, tilting her head and batting her lashes.
I shake my head, even though I easily could.
There’s nobody breathing down my neck or holding me to a timeline– hell, Cam and Avery didn’t even come in today to check on the progress we’ve made.
There’s no reason I can’t just log off and leave, but it’s the end of the week and my tasklist isn’t quite finished.
Besides, Blair and I seem to have this unspoken agreement where we don’t start our weekend until the work is done, so as long as she’s still burning the candle, so will I.
“Not even if your partner’s done working?” Gia asks, glancing toward the entrance to the dining hall.
I turn to follow her gaze, brow furrowing at the sight of Blair walking in. “Hey,” I call out when our eyes lock, waving at her. “I said I’d bring food back for both of us.”
“I can get my own dinner,” Blair replies tersely, rolling her eyes as she struts past.
“Yikes,” Gia comments, hissing in a breath through her teeth as she watches after her. Then she turns back to me, dropping her voice low. “What’s it like working with the ice queen, anyways?”
“What?” I scoff, flinching back with a scowl and shaking my head. “Blair’s cool.”
“Is she?” Gia snorts disbelievingly. “Because from what I’ve heard, she’s kinda a cold bitch.”
“Her mate died,” I deadpan.
“I know, but still.”
I just stare back at Gia for a long moment, something inside me rearing up in defensiveness for Blair’s plight.
“I don’t think it’s fair to judge something you can’t understand,” I reply in a clipped tone, flickering a glance in Blair’s direction as she peruses the food offerings.
“I’ll never experience the fated mate thing, but from watching Cam and Avery together, it’s obvious how deep that bond goes.
I can’t imagine having something like that, then losing it. ”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” Gia concedes with a sigh, drawing my attention back to her. She tilts her head thoughtfully as she gazes up at me, then suddenly shoves up from the bench, throwing up a hand and calling out, “Hey Blair!”
My breathing stalls as Blair slowly turns to cast a suspicious glance our way. Gia waves for her to come over, and surprisingly, she allows herself to be summoned, crossing the dining hall to join us.
Gia moves in closer beside me as she approaches, slipping her hand into mine. Blair’s espresso eyes flit down to our joined hands, and I swear I see a flicker of gold in them when they lift to meet my own, narrowing as she asks, “What’s up?”
“I was just trying to talk Matty into blowing off the rest of his work and coming out to the bar instead,” Gia chirps, winking at Blair conspiratorially. “Whaddya say, you wanna come out with us?”
Blair chews on the inside of her cheek, gaze bouncing between me and Gia while I tug my hand free of hers to run it through my hair instead.
Real smooth.
“I already told her that I’m not coming out,” I mumble to Blair, shifting my weight uncomfortably. “We still have that last task to finish up.”
This time, there’s no mistaking the gold in her irises. Those dark eyes ignite, blazing with a stunning metallic sparkle that I can’t look away from. She holds me captive in her gaze as she swallows thickly, tension crackling between us like a live wire.
“I’m good, but you two have fun,” Blair mutters, her voice hollow. “I’m tired anyways.”
“See!” Gia exclaims, slapping my bicep with the back of a hand.
Blair and I haven’t broken eye contact, still trapped in a staring contest that feels more like a crossroads.
I furrow my brow, tilting my head in question, but I can’t read the expression painting her features.
Then she whips around and bolts for the exit, and before I even realize it, my feet are carrying me out the door after her.
“Blair, wait!” I call as I emerge into the hallway.
“What?” she snaps, spinning around to face me and punching a fist against her hip.
I jog a few steps to catch up, shaking my head. “It’s not like that with her.”
“Like what?”
“Like this.”
“And what do you think this is?” she scoffs, gesturing between us.
I capture her wrist and step in closer, reaching up with the other hand to cup her cheek. “You know,” I rasp, staring into her eyes intently as I draw her face toward mine.
She doesn’t resist. Her breath stutters, lips parting, then she bridges that last fraction of distance between our mouths, kissing me hard.
I kiss her back even harder, searing my intention against her lips as a little whimper slips from her throat.
Her body melts against mine as she gives into the moment, then her palms suddenly flatten against my chest, pushing me back.
I release her lips with a loud pop, stumbling back a step and shaking my head as she blinks at me breathlessly.
“I’m not sorry.”