Chapter 3
Three
Always remember you’re someone’s reason to smile. Because you’re a joke.
—Black to Odin
Odin
“Were you selected?” my assistant, Moses, asked.
I grunted as I slung my cut onto my chair in my office and took a seat.
“Take that as a yes.” Moses smiled. “Nothing came in today. Thankfully. You’re all caught up still.”
Great.
I was hoping to get out of it.
Honestly, I probably could have had I told them I was the medical examiner for Jesper County and if I wasn’t there to do it, nobody would.
But I didn’t.
And it was all because of the redhead that sat next to me for the first half of the day and talked my ear off.
I fully expected her to sit next to me when we got back, but she came in late and had to slip into a seat in the back.
But, for some reason, I got the feeling she didn’t want to sit next to me.
I saw the look on her face when I threw my cut on.
I also noticed how we both had gone to the same deli down the road, and she hadn’t approached once.
“I’m headed out,” Moses said. “Do you need anything?”
“No.”
He left without another word to me, laughing the entire way.
The cunt.
I signed into my computer, checked my email, then listened to my voicemails.
There was nothing, so I headed to the lab, got everything I needed, then took a seat on the counter.
After putting the tourniquet on my arm, I inserted the needle, then tossed the bag into the agitator on the counter before pulling my paperback and starting to read.
I got most of the way through the chapter by the time I was done, then cleaned up after myself, stored the blood in the freezer for when it was needed, and headed out.
Instead of driving home to another frozen meal, I stopped at The Mercantile just long enough to grab a bite to eat and head home.
At least, that had been my plan.
But as I rode down the middle of Main Street headed to my place, a shock of red hair caught my eye heading into the grocery store with a smaller version of herself.
I didn’t mean to stop.
But I found myself pulling into the lot for the grocery store anyway and parking near the car that I’d spotted the redhead getting into when we headed out earlier.
I could use some sandwich shit anyway.
I picked up a basket instead of grabbing a grocery cart, then headed directly to the meat section where I could pick up a couple pounds of lunch meat.
I was ordering when the redhead rounded the corner and came to a sudden stop.
I didn’t acknowledge that she was there and instead waited patiently for my meat to be sliced.
“Mommy, he’s really tall.”
“Yeah,” I heard the redhead reply. “He is.”
My mouth twitched.
I liked kids.
They always said what was on their mind and didn’t really keep any secrets.
I wished all human beings were as forthcoming.
“Here you are, Odin.”
I jerked my chin toward him and tossed the meat into my basket then headed toward the sliced cheese.
I knew it was better for me to get the real shit, but there was just something about Kraft Singles that I fucking liked.
It reminded me of when my mom used to make them for me as a child when we’d been out on the lake all day.
There was nothing better than a turkey sandwich and a cold Coke after a sunburn.
A pang of sadness squeezed my heart at the thought of never getting one of my mom’s sandwiches again.
I missed her.
She’d passed away when I was in prison, and my father had followed suit shortly thereafter. Though, he’d done it the suicide way, and not the natural way like my mom.
I couldn’t fault him, though.
He and my mom had always been tight.
Why would you want to live on this planet without your other half?
Sure, he could’ve stayed for me.
He should’ve stayed for me.
But my dad and mom had always been so close. They worked out together. They went to bed together at the same time every night. They showered together. They went to doctor appointments together. They worked together.
Literally, there was never a moment in time that my mother was there without my dad near.
“Mama, we’re out of apples.”
I stopped when a tiny redhead ran in front of me and snatched an apple off the display to my right.
The apples all started to go.
Every last one of them.
They all rolled off the display and then hit the floor at the little girl’s and my feet.
She looked at me, eyes super wide, and said, “Oh, shit.”
I pressed my lips together to keep from laughing.
Kids had always been a soft spot for me.
Adults? I could take them or leave them.
But kids? They were so fucking innocent.
It was actually freeing to be in a kid’s presence. There were no pretenses, no false platitudes. No anger or hidden agendas.
They were just kids.
“Oh my god, Wendy!” the redhead groaned as she started to pick up apples.
“Whoopsie!” Wendy, the redhead’s little redhead, bent down and grabbed up several. “Sorry, Constance!”
“What have I told you about calling me by my first name?” Constance growled. “You’re my baby girl forever, remember?”
When Wendy stood up, two of her four apples fell to the floor again.
I placed my basket next to the display case and started loading the apples into it.
I’d needed several anyway.
An apple a day kept the doctor away.
Or, more importantly, it kept me healthy so I didn’t have to go to any doctors ever fucking again.
If I never saw another, it’d be too soon.
Even last month when I’d caught my arm on a rusty nail and ripped it open, I’d sewn it shut myself. The thought of having to go to a doctor literally made me want to puke.
“Oh, good idea,” Wendy said. “This is a perfect solution.”
My lips quirked as we loaded my basket up with way more than I ever intended to buy.
“You’ll have to wash these now, though.”
“Baby,” Constance said warily. “I’m sure the man isn’t getting all of those. He’s probably just using the basket to get them off the floor and put them back on the stack.”
“I’m getting some,” I admitted. “But not thirty. I can’t go through them that fast.”
“You look like you could eat thirty, Mr. Big Guy,” Wendy admitted.
“Wendy,” Constance growled.
I started placing the apples in the basket back onto the display case.
“It’s Odin,” I shared.
“Okay, Mr. Odin.” She placed both of her hands on her hips. “How many of these bad boys do you want?”
Constance quietly stacked the apples that’d fallen a little farther out, keeping an eye on me and her child like she was ready to throw herself between her child and danger.
“I’ll take seven,” I said.
We worked in silence for a few minutes until the apples were once again stacked high.
“This is a stupid idea.” Wendy shook her head as she looked at the tower.
“Agreed,” I said as I stood up with my eight apples instead of seven. “Nice to meet you, Wendy.”
“It’s nice to meet you, too, Mr. Odin.”
I winked at her, then stepped back.
Constance glared at me.
Her gaze went from my face to my cut to her child, and she stepped in between us.
“If I was going to hurt her,” I said quietly, “I’d have done it already.”
Constance’s jaw firmed and her chin raised.
I wondered if it really was the club vest.
That was the only thing that changed in between her talking my ear off and her silence.
“You scared of me?”
She scoffed. “Of course not.”
But her gaze went to the cut again, and she stiffened impossibly more.
Taking that as my sign to leave, I stepped around her to the next area.
But I ran into the two an aisle later in the bread aisle.
“What do you think?” Wendy asked me. “Should we get stupid wheat bread with nine whole grains? Or this awesome white bread with a house on it?”
I eyed the wheat bread that I usually bought with nine grains, then the white bread.
The wave of nostalgia for my mom’s sandwiches hit me so hard that I picked up the white bread instead of the wheat.
“See, Mom!” Wendy cried. “Even he buys the house bread!”
Constance glared at me like I’d just committed a crime. “Of course he’d choose the bad stuff.” Under her breath she replied with, “Because he’s bad.”
I didn’t comment, then grabbed the nine-grain as well that I would normally eat and tossed it into my basket.
The next aisle I caught them on was the pasta aisle.
“We could get macaroni like this.” Wendy held up the box.
Fuck, there was that wave of nostalgia again.
I hadn’t had Kraft macaroni and cheese since I’d seen the damn studies on it saying it was toxic.
But a fond smile lifted up the corner of my lips. I’d cooked macaroni and cheese for my mom and dad a lot when I was younger. They’d get off work late, and the only thing I could competently cook for them was that.
I caught a single box up from above Wendy’s head, dropped it into my basket that was getting way heavier as I followed around a five-year-old, and kept walking.
“Constance, seriously.” Wendy groaned animatedly.
I had to hide the damn smile again as I walked down the aisle toward the condiments that I’d originally come down the aisle for.
I needed the good mayo if I was going to make the right kind of sandwich.
After grabbing up some Hellmann’s, I went to the chip aisle.
And this time, I was the first one there as I studied the multitude of brands and types.
I was lifting up the bag of plain Lays when a hand stopped my progress.
Wendy again.
“No, this one,” she spoke eagerly. “They’re spicy pickle.”
She guided my hand to the ones that she liked and I didn’t bother to deny it.
She was doing good with my bad cravings tonight.
“10-4,” I acknowledged. “Thanks.”
She saluted me and headed back to her mom who was at the end of the aisle glaring at me.
I dismissed her and headed for the checkout, getting in line with my least favorite person in town.
Monique English, who couldn’t take no for an answer.
I’d just started being mean to her so she’d hate me, seeing as she couldn’t accept the word “no” that came out of my mouth every time she suggested that I take her out on a date.
Thankfully, she’d finally started to realize I meant it.
Sure, she was beautiful.
But beauty wasn’t enough to make me say yes.
Plus, I just wasn’t sure that I would ever be ready to date again.
Not after my last serious girlfriend, Madalyn, the one that I thought would be my wife one day, had told me to “drop it” when I’d come to her about my fears about Man Wise.
When I wouldn’t drop it, she’d told me that I had to or else.
Her “or else” was actually breaking up with me because her parents were influential and liked the governor. When I’d shown my refusal to follow her rules, she’d broken up with me with a teary “I can’t choose between y’all.”
I’d seen her at a work event months later with another man on her arm.
She hadn’t looked heartbroken at all.
Meanwhile, seeing her with another man had sent a jealous rage through me that had caught me unaware.
From that moment on, I’d sworn off women.
It was easier than dealing with the fallout.
“Why, hello, Odin.” Monique smiled.
I placed my basket on the belt and moved toward the end of the checkout, arms crossed, as I waited for her to check me out.
She spoke, but I didn’t reply.
And when it came time to pay, I did so and left without another word.
I got out to my bike and wondered how the hell I was going to get all my shit home on my bike.
“Rude much?” Constance asked as she came out with her cart and hit the button to open the hatch on her SUV.
I looked over at her. “She doesn’t know the meaning of the word no.”
She snorted. “Sure.”
I waited until Wendy was in the car with the door shut before I said quietly, “Maybe your judgy self wouldn’t understand, anyway.”
I started the bike up with a roar that caused her to flinch.
She glared at me.
I revved it up one more time then headed home, careful not to make any sudden turns so the groceries didn’t go flying.
The SUV Constance was driving left moments after me.
And right when we pulled out into the main road, her high beams turned on and she rode my ass.
The drive home didn’t take me but a few minutes, but for the majority of the time I was smiling.
I fucking hated smiling.