Chapter 4
Kennedy
"We actually came here to hike," Elijah said as we sat in the living room a few minutes later. I figured if I was going to stay with them, I might as well get to know them.
"Jasper here is a photographer, so he plans to take photos on our trails..." Elijah continued.
"Elijah is a workaholic doctor who I managed to drag from his busy schedule so he could touch grass for once," Jasper said.
I laughed, and so did they. "So you're friends?"
"Been friends since high school," Elijah said.
"How long is that? Like, ten years?"
"Try thirteen," Jasper said. "This old man graduated early."
"I'm not that much older than you," Elijah shot back.
"Sure you're not, grandpa."
I grinned, watching them banter. They had an easy rhythm, the kind that came from years of friendship.
"That's so cool. Where do you guys live?"
"We live in Richmond."
"Oh, Virginia. That's where I'm from too, well, not the city, but yeah."
"That's awesome," Jasper said. "Small world."
"What part?" Elijah asked.
"Um, closer to the suburbs. My parents have a house there."
A moment of silence passed between us.
I should have felt more awkward. Three strangers making small talk. But I didn't. They put me at ease.
"We're planning on setting up a bonfire later tonight. You should join us," Elijah said.
"I'd love to."
"Great." He nodded. "It's nothing fancy. Just beer and bad jokes."
"Those are my specialty," Jasper said.
"The bad jokes or the beer?"
"Both."
I went to the bedroom they suggested, which was a cozy space with the matching wooden theme all around. Wooden bed with fluffy white duvets, a small desk, and a chest of drawers. On the floor in front of the bed was a large light gray rug that I knew was soft just by looking at it.
I went and flopped down with a sigh, not bothering to take my suitcase from my car considering I'd be leaving tomorrow. I just grabbed a pair of clothes, sweatpants and a sweater, for when I decided to take a shower.
I wished I wasn't in the situation I was currently in. Elijah and Jasper were great people, but I wanted this to be my getaway. I hated being the one who had to leave.
Though if I was honest with myself, I didn't entirely hate being here with them. Two attractive men who didn't look at me with judgment. Who smiled when I spoke instead of frowning in disappointment.
I sat there thinking about where I'd possibly go next once I left here. The cabins in the Blue Ridge were all booked, so I'd have to find somewhere else entirely. I'd maybe have to go back home and explain to my family why I was back after a day instead of a week.
I truly didn't want to get into that. I didn't want Kate teasing, I didn't want my parents judging more than they had in the past twenty-four hours. I just wanted freedom.
Freedom to be myself. To think what I wanted. To want what I wanted.
After what felt like forever lying there, I decided to head outside where I heard faint talking. Elijah and Jasper were already setting up a bonfire, with two concrete benches on opposite sides of the round pit.
Elijah was the first to notice me.
"Ah, Kennedy. Right on time." He grabbed a beer out of a six-pack and handed it to me while Jasper lit the fire.
"Oh, I don't really drink," I said.
He raised a brow at that, obviously surprised. "Oh."
I bit my lip. "Actually, beer is fine. I can do beer."
I walked toward Elijah and took the chilled bottle from his hand. When I did, my fingers grazed over his, and the brief touch caught me off guard. He seemed to notice too, because his mouth lifted into that charming smile of his.
"You sure?" he asked quietly. "We have water if you'd prefer."
"No, this is good. Thank you."
I took a seat as the fire blazed to life, surrounding me with warmth.
"This place is perfect," Jasper said as he sat down.
"You can say that again," Elijah agreed, taking a swig of his beer.
"So what kind of doctor are you?" I couldn't help but ask.
"I'm a general practitioner. I'm thinking of starting my own private practice soon."
My eyebrows shot up. "Wow, aren't you guys like in your twenties?"
Elijah chuckled. "I'll be thirty-one in December. Jasper here is only twenty-eight."
"Only," Jasper muttered. "Says the guy who's practically ancient."
"Oh, wow."
Older. They were both older than me. More experienced. More confident. Everything I wasn't.
"How about you, Kennedy. How old are you?" Jasper asked as he took a sip of his beer.
"I'm twenty-four. I'll be twenty-five in November." I took a sip, trying not to cringe at the taste.
"Baby," Jasper teased.
"I'm not that young."
"Compared to him over there? You're practically a fetus."
"I'm ignoring you now," Elijah said, but he was grinning.
"So what is it you do?" Elijah asked, leaning back in his seat.
"Er, I'm not doing anything at the moment. I'm a licensed lawyer. I got the results from my bar exam just a few weeks ago."
"A lawyer!" Jasper exclaimed, his eyes widening.
"Yeah."
"At twenty-four. You must be really smart," Elijah said.
I blushed, lowering my gaze to the flames.
Smart. That's what everyone always said. Never passionate. Never brave. Never interesting. Just smart.
"I just... I studied a lot, I guess."
"Don't sell yourself short," Elijah said. "Passing the bar that young is impressive."
"You and Elijah here have a few things in common. He was also a genius back in the day. Graduated top of his class."
I glanced at Elijah, who remained humble. "Wow, that's great."
"Don't encourage him," Jasper said. "His ego's already big enough."
"I have a healthy sense of self-respect," Elijah corrected.
"That's what people with big egos always say."
"I was always the rebel. College didn't quite do it for me. I didn't like the confinement, y'know," Jasper was saying, and I nodded.
Confinement. I understood that more than he knew.
"You just don't like committing to anything," Elijah chuckled.
He shrugged. "That too."
"To anything?" I asked before I could stop myself.
"Jobs, places, people." Jasper grinned. "I like keeping my options open."
"He's a free spirit," Elijah said.
"I prefer 'emotionally unavailable.'"
I laughed, and Jasper winked at me.
The moment hung in the air until Elijah glanced my way again, his eyes drawing me in.
"So Kennedy, what brings a girl like you out here all alone?"
I swallowed. "I, er—I just needed the break."
"From work?" Jasper asked.
"From... everything, I guess."
"Family?" Jasper asked.
I nodded, clearing my throat. "My little sister exposed my diary to my entire family."
They both went still.
"No way!" Jasper exclaimed.
I nodded. "My parents were there, my aunts, my cousin... it was just horrible. My dad won't even look me in the eye, and my mom constantly wears this mask of disappointment." I lowered my head in shame.
"How old is your sister?" Elijah asked.
"Sixteen. Almost seventeen."
"Old enough to know better," Jasper said.
"She was angry. I don't think she meant—" I stopped myself. "Actually, no. She meant it. She wanted to hurt me."
"Damn, it must've been bad then."
I scoffed. "Awful."
"I'm sure it wasn't so bad," Elijah said, trying to ease the tension.
I shook my head, staring at the crackling flames while the memory rushed back to me.
I could tell them. I could just say it was personal stuff and leave it at that. They'd understand. They wouldn't push.
But maybe that was the problem. I'd spent my whole life not saying things. Keeping secrets. Hiding.
"I wrote everything in that book. I don't have any friends, so I thought it'd be good to document my thoughts.
And then I made the mistake of letting my bratty little sister see where I put it away.
It all came out of nowhere. Before I knew it, she was spilling my darkest secrets—telling everyone how I hated my life, how I wanted to have sex with multiple men, that I wanted it raw in all sorts of positions.
You should have seen the looks on their faces... "
I finally looked up, and my breath caught when I realized what I'd just confessed to total strangers. I froze, my mouth hanging open as I registered their expressions.
"Oh gosh, I shouldn't have said any of that." I jumped up from my seat.
Why did I do that? Why did I tell them? They were going to look at me the same way my family did. With disgust. With judgment.
Elijah stood up. "Kennedy, trust me, you don't have to feel bad for saying any of that. You won't get any judgment from us."
"I just—I don't know why I told you that. I barely know you."
"Sometimes it's easier to tell strangers," Jasper said.
I paused, seeing the gentleness in Elijah's eyes.
No disgust. No horror. Just understanding.
"You're serious?"
"Completely," Elijah said.
I nodded, hesitantly taking a seat again. I took a gulp of my beer and sighed softly.
"Yeah, if it's any consolation, we actually do stuff like that, so you're not the odd one out here," Jasper said.
I swallowed the lump in my throat. "What?"
"He means we're not vanilla," Elijah clarified.
"Not even close," Jasper added with a grin.
"Let's just say we have an open mind. We love women, and we love sex," Elijah continued.
My pulse went faster. "So I'm not a freak of nature here?"
"You have human desires, Kennedy. There's nothing wrong with that."
Relief filled me.
Human desires. Not shameful secrets. Not dirty thoughts. Just human.
"Your family's just... traditional," Jasper said. "Doesn't mean you're wrong for wanting what you want."
"They made me feel like I was broken."
"You're honest," Elijah said firmly. "That's rare."
"Thank you. It means a lot hearing you say that."
Elijah nodded, the look on his face reassuring.
"And if you want to explore, never let anyone make you feel bad about it either," Jasper added. "You don't want to look back years from now and say you wish you had."
"Do you guys... I mean, have you..." I trailed off, not sure how to ask.
"Shared?" Jasper finished. "Yeah. We have."
"Oh."
"Does that bother you?" Elijah asked quietly.
"No. No, I just... I didn't think people actually did that. I thought it was just in my head."
"It's more common than you think," Jasper said.
I nodded. "Thanks, guys."
We continued to chat. Talking with them felt natural, safe. I didn't have to wonder if I'd be judged for saying things. All three of us had a few things in common that I found refreshing.
Elijah and Jasper weren't what I'd expected to find on my trip here, but I was happy I did. They made me feel better about myself, and that was saying a lot.
They made me feel seen. Not just a collection of achievements and expectations, but a person with desires and fears and dreams.
That night, I went to bed feeling renewed in a sense. But the more I lay there and thought about it, the more I wondered if going home tomorrow would be the right choice.
Tomorrow I'd leave this cabin. Leave these two men who'd given me something my family never had—acceptance. I'd drive back to Virginia and find another cabin somewhere. Alone. The way I'd originally planned.
The thought didn't appeal to me the way it had yesterday.
It didn't matter anyway.
It wasn't up to me.