Chapter 46
He changes the conversation abruptly, and I’m grateful because I have no idea what to say in response to his words. “You know I realized something when I went back to my home.”
I grasp at this new conversation desperately. “What’s that?” I can’t see him, but I can hear him and feel the heat of his body next to mine.
“I realized how loud you are.”
It takes a moment for the full impact of his words to land on me. “What? I’m not loud.”
“You really are.”
I reach out to shove him and end up pretty much just rubbing my hand across his chest. I pull it back, feeling burned. “I am not loud,” I huff.
“You are. Do you know how quiet it was when I went back? It felt like a tomb when I returned.”
I have no idea how to respond to his words. I’m still trying to figure out if he’s teasing me or not. “Well, that’s because your home is a huge, cold, dark castle.”
He makes an agreeing sound in his chest. “It was,” he concedes but doesn’t say anything more.
Taking the bait, I ask, “It was, but it’s not any longer?” I ask in confusion.
“Now you’re getting it.”
“Getting what? I’m not getting anything!”
He continues in a low voice. “It used to be quiet. Cold. Empty.”
“Dark,” I add.
“Yes. All those things. But then you came along. Suddenly, it was no longer empty or cold and certainly not quiet,” he adds with a low chuckle.
I try to elbow him in the ribs, but he just catches my elbow.
“There was color where there didn’t used to be color, sunlight where there used to be darkness, warmth where there was cold, and…
” he pauses. “Laughter. I didn’t think I’d ever hear Auri laugh again.
Suddenly, she was and often.” He pauses.
“She was never confined to her room, but she sort of just stopped leaving it…until recently. There’s one common denominator for all that. ”
“You left the house more often?” I ask, trying to get a rise out of him.
“Nah. I didn’t really realize the common denominator until I went back home. I was barely there two days back in the Dragon Kingdom, but even then it was enough for me to realize it.”
“Realize what?” I ask in confusion. “You’re talking in circles.”
He chuckles again. “I don’t mean to. Let me put it plainly. It's you, Harper.”
“Come again?”
“You’re the one that makes it warm, colorful, makes Auri laugh, coaxes Elowen to bake more and enjoy life more, and makes it feel like what it’s supposed to feel like.”
“And what is that?” I challenge.
“A home,” he says simply. I reach out until I feel his face and then work my hand up to his forehead, even though the action pulls at my leg and ribs and causes pain. “Uh, what are you doing?” he asks.
“I’m trying to feel if you have a fever because you’re acting delusional.”
“No fever here, Harper,” he says calmly. “But you can keep feeling me up if you want. I don’t mind.”
I snatch my hand back like it’s on fire. “I am not feeling you up!”
“Okay.”
“I wasn’t,” I try again.
“Okay,” he repeats. I sigh in exasperation and try to move some. Pain shoots through my leg, and I gasp. “What’s wrong?” Rauk immediately asks.
“I just moved my leg by accident.”
“I’m sorry you’re in pain.” His voice is gentle, more than I’ve ever heard it. Well, maybe except for when he talks to Auri.
“I still think somebody body snatched you,” I mutter to him. It gets quiet between us, and I try to get comfortable. But every time I try to move my leg, pain shoots all through my leg.
“Can I help you move somehow, so you can get comfortable?”
I scowl in the darkness, trying to focus on anything but the pain.
“No.” It's been long enough now that the pain is starting to spread. I’m starting to feel pain in other places in my body, but I do my best not to focus on them.
I’m also aware of the dropping temperature.
When a shiver runs through me, jerking my leg, I hiss in pain.
I feel more than hear Rauk shift closer, but I don’t say anything.
When he speaks, I can definitely tell he’s closer. “You and Redara did good out there today. You two make an incredible team.” His praise warms me, even though I don’t admit it.
“Well, you and Nox don’t make a bad team either.”
He’s quiet a few moments. “I’m sorry we didn’t get here sooner. It took longer to get everyone mobilized and down here than I thought it would.”
“How many days did it take to get here from your kingdom?”
“Three days, but we were pushing pretty hard. It will probably take four at least to get back.”
“I didn’t think you were going to come back,” I admit.
“I know.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I ask.
“Because I wasn’t sure if I’d get anybody to follow me.”
I scoff. “You’re their king.”
“Yes, but we’re talking about leading our people and our spirit dragons to war outside of our kingdom to another kingdom days away. It hasn't been done before. Or at least not in over a hundred years.”
I suddenly remember the battle Auri and I left. “Is your kingdom okay after the attack?”
“Yes. We followed a certain girl’s advice.”
“You let your spirit dragons fight,” I breathe.
“Yes.”
“And the battle?” I ask, holding my breath.
“Let’s just say, they weren’t prepared for what we unleashed on them. I’m sure they’ll be back, but we’ll be ready and waiting.”
I let out the breath I was holding. “That’s really great.”
“It took only a few hours to end the battle once we let our spirit dragons loose. Then we prepared to come here. From the looks of things, the battle here is done as well.”
“Man, I really hope so. I can’t imagine living without fear of the guivres.”
It gets quiet between us, and I try to get comfortable again. “Tell me about your parents.”
His quiet words shock me, and it takes me a moment to find my voice.
“There’s not much to tell. They didn’t have spirit animals, so we lived with the banished.
We were happy; I know that much. I have small snippets in my memories of them but not many.
They were killed before I turned five.” I swallow.
He doesn’t ask how, and I’m grateful. I’ll tell him at some point that they died of a disease; at least, that’s what I was told. I don’t really remember.
“I’m sorry.” His voice is soft. “What are some of the good memories?”
I think about his words. I think about the few memories I have of them. “There was this book,” I start.
“Yeah?” I can feel his breath on the side of my face.
“Yeah. It was a collection of children’s stories.
I have no idea where or how they got it, but I remember they would read it to me every night.
Or maybe that’s just what I remember. But I loved that book.
” I smile at the memory. “It had the most beautiful illustrations. I would look at them for hours. I think I know every word of every story by heart still to this day. I remember sitting in between the two of them and hearing them take turns reading.” I fall silent.
“What were the stories?” he asks.
“Um, there was The Hearth That Never Went Out, The Map That Changed Every Morning, The Seven Trials of Little Bran, and The Trees That Talked at Night.”
“That’s a beautiful memory. Do you still have the book?”
“No.” I don’t tell him that that was the last time I cried.
It wasn’t when my parents died. It was a few months later, when I returned back to the place I slept and the book was no longer with my things.
I searched everywhere for that book and cried and cried at the loss of the last tie to my parents.
I think losing that book toughened me up more than losing my parents.
I don’t tell him any of this, and yet, it’s like somehow he knows.
“I’m sorry, Harper.”
We don't really talk after that. After a while, I hear his breathing even out; and I will myself to be able to do the same. Are you in a safe place? I send to Redara.
Yes. Noxlyn and I are safe and nearby.
By some miracle, I fall asleep. When I open my eyes, it takes me a moment to get my bearings.
I stare at the chest in front of me in confusion a moment.
But when I try to move, and pain shoots through me, it all comes rushing back.
“Are you in pain?” a low, sleep-laden voice asks. “Never mind. That was a dumb question.”
He’s so close to me, I can literally feel his words reverberate through his chest. I have no idea how I got into this position with his arms wrapped around me, and me against his chest. Needing to take charge of the situation, I explain the most obvious reasoning.
“My guess is that we were cold in the night and sought each other’s body heat. ”
He makes a sound in his chest that neither sounds like agreement nor disagreement.
Needing to put some distance between us, I try to push against his chest. But he doesn’t budge an inch, and I just cause myself more pain.
I breathe through the pain. “As soon as we get out of this mess, we’ll get your leg taken care of, okay?
” His voice is soft and gentle again, and it confuses me.
I don’t know how to deal with this side of him. So, I put us back in a safe place.
“Do you think we’ll be able to get out today?”
“We’re certainly going to try,” he says in response. “In the hours you were hugging my chest, I started making a plan.”
“What? I wasn’t hugging your chest!”
“It’s okay to admit, Harper. It’s a pretty fine chest, if I do say so myself.”
“You are so conceited!” I tell him, smacking said chest. But then I latch onto his words. “What plan?”
His voice turns serious. “I’m going to try to wrap your leg in a splint of sorts and see if we can’t get you out of here.”
“I’ll do it.” I’m desperate to escape this place.
“Okay. I'll try now.” He doesn’t move. “You’ll have to stop hugging my chest first.”
“You are insufferable!” I do my best to roll over, away from him, even as he chuckles. It takes him a lot longer than either of us thought it would take for him to get my leg splinted. When he finally crawls back up to where I can see his face, he’s sweating.
“How does that feel?”
“It doesn’t matter,” I tell him. “We’re getting out.”
“Okay. I am going to go ahead of you and try to cut a way out. If at any time I go too fast, or you get stuck, just stop me.” I nod. He moves so he can see my eyes. “I wish I would have brought food or water.”
I shrug. “It is what it is. Let’s just get out of this place.”
“Okay. I’m going to move a little bit, and you try to follow.
Let’s make sure you’re not caught on anything.
” He moves forward, and I turn my body to him.
My leg screams in protest, but I ignore it.
Honestly, the brace he made does help somewhat.
At least I can move now. But when I get up on my elbows and try to move forward, I can’t.
I turn my head and try to sit up but can’t. I can’t see what I’m stuck on.
“Rauk,” I call out, finally admitting defeat. It takes him a minute or two to get back to me. “I’m stuck. Sorry.”
“Don’t be. Let me see what has you stuck.”
He moves to my feet first. “I don’t see anything.” He rolls my shoulders towards him. “I don’t get where you’re stuck.”
“I don’t know. Every time I try to move, I can’t move.”
“Okay. Let me try this.” His face is right next to mine, and he wraps his arm around me. “I’m going to try rolling you over, so I can see what it is that’s trapping you.” He rolls, and I hear a ripping sound; but then I’m free. He meets my eyes. “Well, you’re free now.”
“Yeah, but am I wearing any clothes now?” I ask dryly.
He rolls me slightly and looks at my back. “Nope.”
“Are you serious?” I ask because that would be just my luck.
He smirks. “I mean you’re missing most of the back of your shirt, but that’s the least of our worries.” He frowns suddenly. “Your back is going to be exposed and end up getting more scratched. Here, I’ll give you mine.”
I stop him by putting a hand on his chest and then quickly dropping it. “There’s no way you’re getting your shirt off in here. I’ll be fine. I just want out of here.”
He must hear the plea in my voice because he nods.
“Okay. Let’s go.” We start again. He takes the lead, and I follow.
My bad leg is dead weight, but between my arms and my one good leg, I’m able to crawl.
And honestly, crawling is all we can do under all this underbrush.
It feels like it takes hours to move a few inches, but I force myself not to think about it.
Rauk checks in with me every little bit. “How are you doing back there?”
“Fine,” I grunt as I pull myself along.
“Just think of all the good food we’re going to eat when we get out of here,” he says.
“Hungry?” I ask.
“Starving.”
I feel bad about that, but there’s absolutely nothing I can do except keep moving to get out of here.
Before long, I’m a sweaty mess. My bad leg is killing me, and the muscles in my arms feel like they’re going to give out.
That doesn’t count for the rash that I’m sure is developing on my stomach from scraping it raw and all my other scratches and aches and pains, but I remind myself that each new scratch is one inch closer to freedom.
And then finally, when I don’t think I can go any further, I hear Rauk’s voice.
“We’re almost free, Harper.” Those words spur me on, and I keep pushing.