Chapter 54
I shove him back lightly. “In your dreams.”
“You do star in my dreams, Harper,” he says with a wicked grin.
I shake my head. “You’ve completely lost it.”
“My sanity? You’d be correct about that.”
I scowl. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Well, while you’ve been waiting around to decide if you want to do this thing—”
“What thing?” I interrupt.
His eyes widen. “Us, Harper.”
“You mean because our dragons are mates?” I ask.
He shakes his head. “You drive me crazy.”
“Hey! Rude.”
His eyes bore into mine. “Let me make this very clear. I’m talking about you and me. Not our dragons, not our being mates...just you and me.”
“Well, since we’re being clear, then I need to point out that we’ve done nothing but fight since we first met each other. In fact, we both hated each other.”
“I never hated you,” he tries to butt in, but I put my hand over his mouth, silencing him.
“We couldn’t stand each other. You didn’t want me to come to your kingdom, but you allowed it. And then you were never around; remember that? You were gone all the time. You were avoiding me! So, acknowledging that there even is an us is a huge first step.” I remove my hand from his mouth.
He lifts an eyebrow. “Are you done?”
I pretend to think about it. “Yes. For now.”
He smirks and takes a step forward, right into my personal space.
I respond by taking a step back. He does the same thing again, and I do as well.
Suddenly, I can’t take any more steps backwards because my back is against the wall.
He steps forward, so close that our chests are touching.
I try to draw in a breath, but it lodges somewhere in my lungs.
“You are the most infuriating woman I have ever met.”
I scowl up at him. “Oh, and you’re just Mr. Perfect, aren’t you?”
“Your words,” he says with a cocky grin.
“You are so—” I gasp when his lips touch mine, effectively silencing me. It’s so light and brief, I’m almost unsure if it really happened.
“What was that?” I demand.
“If I have to explain it, I obviously didn’t do a very good job.
” His lips touch mine again, and I go still.
I’ve never done this before. My entire body seems to react to his kisses.
Each one is soft and light and just barely there, and yet my skin is on fire.
“Who knew?” he says softly in between kisses.
“What?” I breathe.
“That this was the way to get you to be quiet.”
My eyes snap open, and I narrow my eyes on him. He chuckles, his shoulders shaking. “Laugh it up, Big Guy.” His eyes meet mine, and I can see the humor there.
“What are you going to do?” He challenges.
Something snaps in me. I don’t have an ounce of experience with any of this, and yet, I’ve never been one to back down from a challenge.
I shove his shoulders back, harder this time.
He takes a small step back. I'm pretty sure he let me move him. I push him again, and he takes another step back, still smirking at me. When the back of his knees hit the bed, I push again, and he sits on the edge of the bed. I step in between his legs and put my hands on his shoulders. He's no longer smirking; in fact, I think he’s no longer breathing as well. I lean forward and put my face near his neck. I don’t touch him, but I feel the shudder that runs through his entire body.
“Harper,” he warns in a low voice.
“What? You can’t handle this?”
“You have no idea what you’re doing,” he grounds out.
My head jerks back, and embarrassment floods me. I take a step backwards and then turn to flee. I only make it a step or two before a hand grabs mine. “Harper, wait.”
“Let go.” I try to pull my wrist from his grip, but he won’t release it.
“Harper, look at me.”
“What?” I snap, looking up at him.
“I didn’t mean that how it sounded...how you took it,” he corrects.
I lift an eyebrow. “I think it was pretty clear.”
He laughs, low in his chest; and I’ve had enough. I yank my hand from his and stride towards the door. He beats me there, closing and blocking the door with his large body. “Move,” I demand.
“No.”
“Rauk—”
“Harper,” he returns. I take a breath and try to cool my rising anger. “I’m not letting you go until you listen to me.”
I cross my arms over my chest and will my heart to stop pounding. “What?”
“Will you look at me, please?”
I lift my eyes to his, hoping that it will get me out of here sooner. I don’t expect to see the gentleness there; I've never seen that soft of a look on this man. “I’m trying so desperately to stay in control, Harper.”
His words surprise me. “What?”
“You have the power to be my complete and utter undoing. The things I feel with you, for you,” he shakes his head. “I’ve never felt them with any other person before.”
I can’t help the words that slip out. “You better not have.”
A small smile builds on his face. “Rest assured; I haven’t.
” The smile fades, and a new intensity takes over.
“I feel so much for you; it sometimes feels like I’m drowning in it.
” His words shock me to my core. “I know how averse to touch and emotion you are, so I’ve tried to keep myself completely under control at all times.
When I was sitting on the bed, and you were doing what you were doing, I wanted to lose control.
That's what I meant—that you have no idea how you affect me, what you do to me.” He blows out a breath.
“Harper, no one has ever had as much control over me as you do, and that scares me. You could ask me for anything, and it would be yours. And that makes you incredibly dangerous.”
I cock my head to the side. “You called me that once before.”
“Only once?” he asks with a laugh.
“Once or twice,” I concede. “You said I was like the tree I’d painted...dangerous.”
He nods back. “Yeah.”
“I was dangerous to you back then?"
“Harper, you were dangerous the moment I met you. The first time you tossed your braid over your shoulder and asked me if I was ready to stop hiding?” He grins. “Your eyes shot fire at me, and I knew I was never going to be the same. And when you threw that knife?” His grin widens.
I scoff. “You didn’t even know who I was.”
“It didn’t matter. I knew I would do whatever it took to make you mine.” He grins, but it’s dark. “You called me King Jerkface.”
I grimace. “Okay, that was not my best insult. But in my defense, Farrah was going through a no cursing stage.”
“You know, I’ve been wondering for a long time. What were you going to call me?” He trails his fingers up my arm, nearly making me lose my train of thought.
“What do you mean?”
“You were going to call me a better name, but Rysden cut you off. I want to know what it was,” he says with a wicked smirk. “I have a feeling I’m going to love the name you were going to call me.”
I feel my face flush. “I don’t remember.”
He coaxes me closer. “Yes, you do. What was it? Harper?” He puts his hand behind my back and runs his hand up and down my spine. “The name, Harper.”
I lean back and look him dead in the eye. “I was going to say King Stick Up Your—,” I pause, grinning. “You know what.” He stares down at me and then throws his head back and laughs. “You can’t tell me you enjoyed our interaction; you were so angry. And that couldn’t have been fake.”
“Oh, it wasn’t fake. I really was angry; nobody had ever talked to me that way. That was what was so intriguing about you. You made me crazy and yet fascinated me at the same time, which was infuriating.” He smirks. “Pretty sure nothing has changed in that regard.”
“Thank you,” I say and give him a small bow. A massive yawn slips out, and he tugs me close.
“Come on. You need sleep.” He puts a hand on my lower back and keeps it there the entire walk back to my room.
Surprisingly, it doesn’t bother me. In fact, I find myself almost leaning into his touch, which is shocking, to say the least. When we stop at my door, I open the door and step inside.
It doesn’t surprise me that he follows me.
“Thank you for my room, the books, everything.”
He stares down at me. “You’re welcome. Get some sleep, Harper.” And then he leans close and kisses me lightly on the cheek. “Dream of me tonight; I’ll be dreaming of you.” He closes the door behind him, and I think I stare at the door a good five minutes before I finally move.
Somehow, I stay awake long enough to bathe, change into nightclothes, and then finally pass out on the bed.
I’m slow to wake up the next morning; my body is sore from riding all day yesterday.
I finally manage to drag myself out of bed and get dressed for the day and make my way to the kitchen in sort of a daze.
I push open the door, and my stomach growls loudly.
I’m busy making a plate and don’t hear the kitchen door push open.
Not until there’s suddenly a hand at my stomach do I realize Rauk is in the kitchen with me.
“Morning, Gorgeous,” he says, leaning forward and dropping his head close to my neck.
“If you keep me from eating, I might stab you,” I grunt.
I can feel his body shaking. “Okay, Stabby.” When I turn and see him laughing, I glare at him. I start to walk away from him, but he snags me around the waist again and pulls me close. I don’t tense this time, and it surprises me. “Since when did you get so touchy feely?” I ask.
“You have no idea how long I’ve waited to have permission to touch you any time I want.”
“And you have that permission now?” I challenge.
“I don’t know. Do I?” he challenges right back. He turns serious. “Does my touching bother you?”
I meet his gaze and shrug. “I’m not sure yet; I think you’ll have to keep testing it out.”
When the full impact of my words land, his lips turn up into a carnal smile. “I love testing things out.” He reaches for me, but I spin out of his grasp.
“But if you try to touch me instead of letting me eat my breakfast...”
He grins and lifts both hands. “I would never get between my girl and her food.” His words hit me so hard, I swear I can feel their physical impact on me. “Harper?” he asks, all trace of teasing gone from his voice. “What is it?” His hand is at my elbow again.
I shake my head. “Nothing.”
“No, don’t do that. If we’re going to make this work, and we are, we have to be honest with each other.”
I take a breath and look up at him. “I’ve just never been anybody’s...anything before. It’s stupid.”
“It’s not stupid.” He pulls me close and lifts my chin, so I’m looking directly into his eyes.
“You’ve been my girl since the moment I met you; I was just waiting for you to realize it.
” He leans forward slowly, giving me plenty of time to pull away and then kisses me softly.
Once, twice, three times. A voice clears, and I jerk back.
“It’s about time,” Elowen says with a smile as she walks over to her prep counter.
I feel like her words should embarrass me, but they don’t.
They just help make everything feel real.
When I lift my head, Rauk winks at me. I smile and carry my food over to the table and start eating.
Rauk slides into the seat next to mine and drops his hand onto my knee, squeezing gently.
I smile as I take another bite of my food, suddenly glad that I took a chance returning here.
This is where I belong, and this is where I’m going to stay.