4. Emma
CHAPTER FOUR
The kids are always on pins and needles when it gets close to time for Addy to come home from a trip. I heard Vicki in Hannah’s room late last night. Usually, I would have intervened and sent them both to bed. But I paused when I overheard Vicki tell her little sister she thought we needed to be closer to the rest of our family. I’m confident Vicki enjoys living close to my parents, but I’ve underestimated how much she misses the family that surrounded her when she was little. And I’m also sure she senses Addy and I are a little lonely here. We both enjoy spending time with family. God knows, my family adores Addy. But as much as the feeling is mutual, it is stillmyfamily. Tamara was Addison’s lifeline for years. She’s more like a sister to Addy than a friend.
Launching Off Screen was a significant milestone for Addy, not just in her career but also for us as a couple. It brought new connections into her life, expanding her social circle. As time went on, those friendships grew deeper and stronger. Jeff and Sandra became more than friends; they became our family, even more so than some of our biological relatives.
After overhearing Vicki’s conversation with Hannah, I couldn’t sleep. I tossed and turned for hours before finally giving up and calling Sandra. As we talked, my emotions poured out, and so did hers. I’ve had the privilege of working with many talented actors throughout my career. Sandra and I spent countless hours together on and off the set of Off Screen. Our characters’ relationship was tumultuous yet passionate, and we had to learn to read each other’s emotions to create a believable dynamic between Genevieve and Jack. We held each other on and off set through the best and worst times—through celebrations and loss. She was the first person to feel Vicki’s kick when I was pregnant—something I’ve never told Addy. And I was the person who held her for hours when she found out she was pregnant after our co-star, Dan’s death. It’s amazing how physical distance doesn’t affect that kind of emotional bond. Sandra knew the reason behind my call without me saying a word.
“Mom!”
The pitch to Vicki’s voice is all I need to hear to know Addy is home. I wander to the back door and stand in the doorframe, watching our children run toward the car. As I watch Addy scoop up Noah and accept hugs from our daughters, I’m reminded of how fortunate we are.
“Hey,” Addy says when she reaches the porch. She sets Noah on his feet and kisses me.
“Hi.”
Addy’s brow furrows. “Em? Are you okay?”
“I’m glad you’re home.”
“Me, too.”
“Momma?”
Addison and I both look over at Hannah.
“Yes?” Addy asks.
“Did you stay with Aunt Tam?”
“I did,” Addy says. “You’ll see her in a week.”
“Really?” Hannah asks.
Addy looks at me, silently asking if she’s spoken out of turn. I was waiting for her to come home to tell the kids we’d have company for the long weekend.
Addison leans into my ear. “Did I let the cat out of the bag too soon?”
I chuckle. “No.” I look at three pairs of expectant eyes. “I had thought we’d share this news at dinner,” I begin. “But?—”
“Are we all going to Disney?” Vicki asks.
I force myself not to laugh. Our house is likely to feel a bit like Disneyland next weekend—animated and loud. “No,” I reply. “But Tam and Christie will be here with Daniel.”
“Really?” Vicki asks.
“Really. And Sandra and Jeff will also be here.”
“With Brody?” Vicki asks hopefully.
“And Bailey,” I say.
Hannah jumps up and down. She loves to play with Sandra and Jeff’s daughter, Bailey.
“Okay,” I say. “I know everyone is excited. I’ll bet Momma is tired. She was up really early so she could get home today. So, why don’t you play outside for a bit while I help Momma get her things and get dinner ready?”
Vicki grabs Noah’s hand. “Okay! Come on, guys. We gotta plan for the weekend!”
Addison rolls her eyes. “She’s either going to grow up to be the president or the head of a crime family.”
I laugh. “Please, don’t turn that into a series.”
Addison turns to me, smiles, and kisses me deeply.
“Addy.”
“I missed you, Em.”
“Mm. I missed you, too, love. Let’s get your bag and?—”
“I’ll get it later,” Addy says.
“Are you sure?”
“Positive.”
“Okay. Well, you get settled, and I’ll get dinner started.”
“Em?”
“Hm?”
“Could this be a hot dog and mac and cheese night?”
“I thought you’d be tired of eating that after dining at Tam’s,” I say.
Addy shrugs.
“Addy?”
“The kids will be out there for hours unless we call them,” Addison says.
“True.”
“I just—I hoped we could talk.”
A familiar storm is brewing in Addison’s eyes, and I lift my hand to cup her cheek. “Why don’t I see if Mom will feed the gremlins tonight?”
“I don’t want to?—”
“Addy. They’ll be keen to tell her all their plans for the weekend. Trust me.”
Addison nods.
“Why don’t you grab a shower? I’ll meet you on the deck,” I suggest.
“Em?”
“Go on,” I tell Addison. “I’ll meet you out there.”
Addison nods again and heads for our bedroom. I take a deep breath and exhale it slowly. “Well, let’s hope I’m reading everything correctly.”
“Wine?” Addison asks when she walks onto the deck.
“I thought we could relax out here for a while,” I reply.
“Do I need wine?”
I wink. “No, but I might.” I pour us each a glass and hand one to Addison. “How was your visit?”
“Great. I still can’t believe they’re moving to the East Coast.”
“Mm. I’m going to climb out on a limb and guess you’d hoped Christie would be interested in this new show you’ve outlined.”
“I’m that obvious, huh?” Addison asks.
“Only to me. Why didn’t you talk to me?”
“Em, I don’t want to push you into something.”
“Honey, talking isn’t pushing.” I sip my wine and set it aside. “Tell me what you want to do, Addy.”
“Me?”
“Yes. You.”
“I want to create something with you.”
“I thought we were doing that.”
“Yes, but don’t you miss it?”
“Acting?”
“Being on a show,” Addison says.
I take a deep breath and nod. “I do, but there is a lot to consider.”
“Yeah. And now the main thing that might pull us back to California won’t be there.”
“That’s true.” I watch Addison’s shoulders slump in defeat. “Addy?”
“I feel it, Em—this show could be something special.”
A smile stretches my lips. Everything Addison writes is special, but I know what she means. It’s a chance for us to create something entirely new and memorable—something different from Off Screen but just as magical. “Then I guess we should find a way to make it happen.”
Addison's head pops up, and her gaze narrows.
“What did you think I would say?” I ask.
“I don’t know. I didn’t think you?—”
“Addy, there are a lot of things we need to discuss—things that extend far beyond selling the concept, casting, and budget realities. If we decide to do this—to launch a new series together—it will mean changing our lives. It will mean changing our children’s lives.”
“I know. And that’s the thing. I don’t want to move our family to someplace where we aren’t close to family. I mean, Jeff and Sandra are close to LA. And we have friends there, but it’s not the same as here. And I can’t ask you to make a?—”
Addison is beginning to ramble. “Addy.”
“What?”
“Maybe you need to change your lens.”
“Huh?”
Addison is the most sensitive person I’ve ever met. She’s incredibly resilient, but she feels everything intensely. Sometimes, it causes Addison’s field of view to narrow. “You’ve zoomed in so close you can’t see the whole picture.”
“I don’t follow, Em. Part of the reason I started writing Domesticated was to find a way to bring us all back together.”
“Mm-hm. And you think we can’t make it happen now because Christie will be working in Boston?”
“On a major show. Geez, Em. She’ll be taping almost half the year—on the other side of the?—”
“World?” I ask lightly. I chuckle when Addison groans. “It feels like the other side of the world,” I say. “It isn’t. I’m going to ask you something, and I want you to be honest with me.”
“I’m always honest with you.”
“Maybe. You also hold back sometimes—even after all these years. I want you to tell me the truth—all of it, Addy. Okay?”
Addison nods.
“Are you willing to uproot our lives—all of our lives—to take a chance on this project?”
Addison stares at me.
“Are you, Addy? Because if we decide to do this—to move our kids, we need to commit to staying—to giving it time, even if the project tanks.”
“I know. If you’d asked me this a week ago, my answer would have been yes.”
“What changed in a week?” I ask.
“Tam and Christie. Em, if Christie had a job in LA, it would be different.”
“Because they would still be close.”
“Yes.”
I take a deep breath and exhale slowly. I’m about to propose something to Addison I know she doesn’t expect. “What if they were close?”
“What are you talking about?”
I reach beside me and hand Addison the pilot script for Domesticated—complete with my plethora of red lines. She looks at it, flips a page, studies it for a moment, and looks back at me.
“Em?”
“Why not let Emma’s life unfold in New York?” I suggest.
“Emma. New York? You want to move our family to New York City?”
“No. But I’m confident there are places close enough to the city which would provide the kids the type of childhood we both want them to have.”
Addison stares at me.
“I love the concept,” I tell Addison. “And I know all the reasons you created it. You know me better than anyone. I miss it, too, Addy. The kids need us—but they’re happiest with their friends at school, and we both know that will only become truer as time passes.”
“Em. New York? It’s so far from?—”
“It’s a plane ride, Addy. No matter what we decide, we will be a plane ride from someone we love. Maybe it’s time for us to settle closer to your dad.”
“Is that why you’re suggesting this?”
“No—at least, not entirely,” I reply. “Tam and Christie are family, too. The kids miss them, and God knows, Vicki misses Brody.”
“I know. But they’ll miss your parents and their cousins.”
“True. Evan will be a senior in high school next year. They’ll be missing their cousins no matter where we live.”
“What about the house?” Addison asks.
“Well, I suppose we could sell it. I thought we’d keep it as a place for summers and visits. It would be ideal for Mom and Dad to use for company when we’re not here.”
Addison bites her lip. “I never considered moving back east.”
“I know.”
“We don’t know if anyone will be interested in the show, Em. I mean, if Christie was on board, I’m pretty sure we’d get more than a few nibbles.”
I can’t conceal my grin.
“What?” Addison asks.
“What if I told you Sandra is interested?”
Addison shakes her head.
“Bad idea? Having Sandra playing my love interest again?”
“Bad idea? Are you kidding? Em, people have been begging for that for years!”
I nod.
“You talked to Sandra?”
“As a friend—yes. Jeff is tired of producing for other people, Addy. He wants to get back to creating something—writing.”
“Jeff’s work is based in California.”
“At the moment. It doesn’t need to be,” I say.
“Do you actually think they’d consider moving?”
“The business has changed. You know that. We don’t need to be in LA. The answer is, I don’t know. I can’t promise you that Jeff and Sandra will want to move or agree to move. But I think for the right opportunity, they will. We all miss each other.”
“I know. But, Em, there’s no guarantee we can strike gold twice.”
“No. But if anyone can, it’s us. Jesus, Addy. If James Reynolds can launch one hit show after another, we ought to be able to have another commercial and critical success. Why not? Who knows? Maybe Christie will come on board, too.”
“That’d be a neat trick.”
“Not really. There are ways to make that happen. If that’s something she wants, and it matters enough to you to work with her.”
“What about you?” Addison asks. “Are you sure about this?”
“I’m sure I want to discuss it with our friends—yes. And if we’re all on board, then yes—I’m sure.”
“And the kids?”
“The kids will be happy if they know we’re confident in our decision. And frankly, if we’re going to do this, now is a good time. In a few years, it’ll be harder for them to leave friends behind.”
“It’s a huge change, Emma.”
“Is it? It’s a new house, Addy. It’s a shift. We’ve made those before. And one day, we will make them again.”
“What about your parents?”
“They’ll understand. My parents have never tried to hold me back—to hold me here. You know that.”
“I do. But, Em, we’ve been here a few years. This is home and your folks are used to having you close—to having the kids close. And you love it here, too—being close to your family.”
Every day, I’m reminded of the reasons I fell in love with Addison, or it could be more accurate to say that every day, little things make me fall in love with her all over again. I struggle to answer when people ask if it was love at first sight for us. I can’t say I knew I loved Addy the moment we met. It was more like a recognition—something shifting inside me told me not to let her walk away. Addy’s eyes had a certain allure—a mischievous glimmer mixed with genuine kindness. As we became closer, I could see in her eyes a desire for more than physical intimacy with me but also a yearning for profound, unconditional love and acceptance. The absence of her family for many years left a void in Addy’s life, and she yearned for the sense of belonging that only a family can provide.
My family welcomed Addison with open arms, and they have become a source of comfort and stability for us as a couple. But even more importantly, they provided that for Addy. Developing a relationship with my parents has helped her heal and find a renewed connection with her father. Her reluctance to leave Kansas doesn’t surprise me. But Addy also forgets families aren’t given. They’re created.
I reach over and take Addison’s hand. “I love you so much, Addy.”
“Huh?”
I can’t help but giggle. “Have I not told you I love you lately?”
“Em?”
With a sigh, I continue. “I do, Addy. I love you more than you sometimes take the time to realize. You’re so busy giving to all of us—worrying about how I feel, what the kids need, what you can do for everyone—you lose sight of how much you mean to all of us. Just listen. I love being close to our family. My parents, Jackson, Sarah, Evan, and Andrew—they’re part of our family. But, Addy. They aren’t a bigger part or even a more important part of this family than Tamara and Christie, your dad, or Jeff and Sandra. Family is so much more than what we are given. I’m blessed, and I know it. I was fortunate to be born into a nurturing family who loves me, even when we drive each other crazy. But my family was incomplete until I met you.”
“Em.”
“No. You need to listen. Our marriage is the centerpiece of my life. It’s the tether that holds our family together. Families are collections of people, relationships, and love. And that takes work to build and maintain. It’s always hard to be apart from people you love.”
“I should never have asked you to live here full time,” Addison says.
“You haven’t been listening. I wanted to make the move here every bit as much as you did, Addy.” I hold up my hand to keep Addison from interrupting me. “It took me a little longer to embrace the idea because we’d created a wonderful home and family in Los Angeles, and I was afraid moving here would alter that—that I would regret it.”
“I know.”
“But I don’t regret it—not at all. It’s been wonderful, and I’m so grateful we’ve spent these early years with our children here. I am. But home will be wherever we’re together. Some days, I still miss walking to the pool to see you swimming laps or hearing Vicki squeal with excitement when King would jump in and then run through the mud.”
Addison laughs. “I can’t say I thought you’d miss that.”
“Those are precious memories for both of us.”
“Yeah. They are.”
“And we have those here, too. Noah’s birth, lost teeth, skinned knees, dance recitals, Christmases, and barbecues—and unexpected upheavals.”
“Em, I know this last year has been hard for you.”
“It’s had its share of challenges,” I reply. “Going through that—learning I had cancer, praying I would be healthy again—it changed my outlook.”
Addison’s eyes retreat to her lap. This is a topic she avoids whenever possible.
“Addy, look at me.” I smile when Addison’s gaze meets mine. “We got through it. Not me—we. But I think if we’re honest with each other, it was a wake-up call. It was for me. And I won’t lie to you. The thought of taking on a series again—of trying to balance raising three kids, our marriage, and the demand of leading a series feels?—”
“Overwhelming?”
“Yes. And scary. But also, exciting.”
Addison nods.
“We both feel safe here,” I tell her. “But safe is overrated, Addy. I trust you to keep me safe, and I trust us to keep our kids as safe as anyone can hope to—no matter where we go.”
“And if everyone is on board?” Addison asks.
“Then we take it one step at a time, but one deliberate step at a time.”
“And if we can’t?—”
“Addy, don’t project anything, okay? Let’s talk to everyone this weekend. Put our ideas on the table. Do you remember when you told me you would end Off Screen if that’s what it took for us to start our family—if it was what I wanted? You would step away?”
“I would have.”
“Mm. And now it’s my turn.”
“What do you mean?”
“To step back in.”
Addison closes her eyes and nods. “I want you to be happy. I want you to be sure.”
“No one is happy all the time,” I say. “And no one can be certain what lies on the other side of a second.”
Addy opens her eyes and looks at me.
“I am certain of you—of us.” I move to sit on Addison’s lap and kiss her lips softly. “It’s a fabulous idea.”
“Do you really think so?”
“Mm. It’s funny because it’s emotionally trying—and it’s real. I’d be a fool to pass up the chance to bring it to life with you.”
“Thanks, Em.”
“I only told you the truth.”
“We should probably call the kids, huh?”
I wink. “No need. Mom said she’d keep them for the night. She’ll drop Noah off after she takes Hannah and Vicki to school in the morning.”
“Maybe we can convince them to move with us,” Addy says.
I laugh.
“I mean—the free babysitting is?—”
“Addy?”
“Hm?”
“Shut up and kiss me.”
Addison grins, leans close, and obliges my request.
“You know what we haven’t done in a long time?” Addison asks.
I lift a brow.
“Trivia.”
I shake my head, pull myself from Addy’s lap, and hold out my hand. Let’s see if she remembers Paul Newman brought Twilight to life long before any vampires emerged. I suppress a giggle. I love trivia.