Chapter 23 Penelope
Chapter twenty-three
Penelope
Aweek later, Daniel picks us up from our home again.
I love how regularly he makes time to see us.
I love these moments with him. I love watching him grow and build confidence as a father.
Danny smiles and giggles more with him than I think I’ve ever seen before.
I’ve always been serious and subdued, but he’s silly and goofy and high energy with her, and I love that.
Things with Daniel are easier than I expected, and he’s the definition of what you see is what you get.
He has no tricks or deception up his sleeves.
From the very beginning of this he told me what he wanted.
He eagerly plans time we can be together, and the more we see him, the more confident I am that we can make something work - that he isn’t going to change his mind or flake on us.
Except today he’s being cagey about his plans for us. A part of me is worried because it’s out of my control, but a part of me trusts Daniel. He’s given me no reason not to.
So, I’m surprised when we pull into one of the nicer parts of DC and into the driveway of a gorgeous row house.
And instantly I know where we are.
“Is this your house?” I ask, even though I already know.
“Yep. I have a surprise for both of you,” he says, before rounding the front of the car and opening both my and Danny’s doors simultaneously.
Trepidation thrums through me, but I’m not exactly sure why.
Yes, our class gap is a source of unease for me, but I trust Daniel and I trust his heart.
He’s not motivated by money. He may have started his adulthood motivated by pretty revenge against his parents, but that only informed his career, not his morals or values.
He’s generous. He’s generous with his money, with his time, and it’s only my past with money that is causing any issues between us.
His house is gorgeous, old-school DC. Not flashy or showy, but from a time when wealth meant quality and class. The details on the window casings and under the roof whisper at a craftmanship only the wealthy could afford back then — it doesn’t scream about it now.
Pushing my money issues to the side, I think I’m nervous because of the reaction Daniel’s hoping to get out of us. Does he simply want to show us where he sleeps? Is he proud of his house? Is he pushing for us to move in? It’s the unknowns that scare me.
But again, I trust Daniel, so I hold Danny’s hand gently and let Daniel lead us into his house.
There’s a small informal entryway with a built-in closet for jackets and umbrellas, but it immediately opens up into an opulent sitting room full of off-whites and creams. It looks staged, and way too expensive to be a family home.
I toe off my shoes and nod for Danny to do the same.
Daniel doesn’t wait though, before striding into the house and tossing his jacket onto the back of the couch.
“Alright. Who wants their present first?”
Skipping along behind him, Danny squeals, “Me! Me!”
“Sweet!” Daniel says, adopting Danny’s high pitch. “Your present is right up those stairs, first door on the right.”
Nerves gnaw at my stomach.
“Daniel,” I whisper, my voice deathly serious. “What did you do?”
He spins, takes three steps to close the distance before wrapping his arms around my lower back and dragging me to him for a kiss that doesn’t last nearly long enough. The grin he gives me when we part and he sees the effect he has on me should be illegal.
“You’ll see.”
He steps back but keeps a steadying hand on my hip. Danny’s little footsteps running up the stairs sound like a herd of elephants.
She squeals when she reaches the top of the stairs before disappearing into the room. Anxiously, I rush up the stairs and round the corner to see a child’s room. A little girl’s room, based on the ruffles and frills and stuffed animals on the bed. All in yellows and greens.
Emotion squeezes my throat painfully, and tears prick my eyes.
“Mommy?” a worried voice asks, where Danny’s jumping on the bed.
Emotions war in my chest. Gratitude for Daniel’s thoughtful gifts, shame at how much nicer this bedroom is than the one I’ve given her, fear that this could all get taken away from her in a moment, and something else I don’t know how to name.
A large, warm hand rubs up and down my back soothingly.
“You made a room for her?” I whisper as Daniel comes to stand behind me.
“I’m a dad. It seems like things like booster seats and movies and a bedroom are kind of standard-issue things, right?”
I watch as Danny climbs off the bed and organizes the stuffed animals while I breathe through and try to simply absorb the moment.
“Cara said you like greens and yellows, but I know favorite colors change all the time, so you can let me know if you want to decorate it another way, okay Danny?” he asks her, and the smile she gives him is adoring. This man is just as much a part of our daughter’s heart as he is mine.
“Want to let her explore while I give you your present?”
Another round of nerves simmers through my chest like angry wasps. It’s too much. It’s all already too much. But the idea of disappointing him by telling him that would wreck me. He’s done nothing but be thoughtful and kind, and I’ve been fighting him - fighting this - the entire time.
But I also don’t trust my voice not to break, so I simply nodded.
With his hand on the small of my back, he leads me down the short hallway and to a pair of French doors. He opens the door and ushers me inside, leaving it open so I can listen for Danny. It’s a bedroom, elegantly decorated with greys and creams. Not my choice for bedding, but it screams Daniel.
“A bedroom? Is this one for me?” I ask, trying to tease him, but this time my voice does crack.
He chuckles softly at me. “Kind of.” He motions to a large antique vase full of the most beautiful floral arrangement on top of an antique dresser.
“Flowers?”
“Warmer,” he teases back.
Frustration and fear surge through me. “Daniel,” I scold.
He gives in and pulls open a set of drawers.
"I cleared space in here and in the closet for you," he says, walking over to his walk-in closet and turning on the light. My pulse picks up. This is too much, too fast, too far.
He must see the panic in my eyes because he comes over and grips both of my biceps.
“I’m not demanding anything. I’m not saying you have to move in with me. I’m just making room for you - in case you want to spend the night. Both of you.”
I lick my lips and nod my head, repeating to myself: just spend the night. That I could do. One night I could do.
“Next time you come over, bring a set of pajamas you can leave here, or some loungewear. I got extra toothbrushes for the two of you, as well. Danny’s bathroom’s just down the hall.”
Just one night.
I could do just one night.
I breathe in through my nose until my heart rate slows. I nod again.
“Th-thank you,” I squeak out, because the gesture is thoughtful, and he knows me well enough to talk me out of a panic.
It’s logical. If we were divorced, he would have some custody of Danny and would have a bedroom at his house for her.
It’s logical. And while the idea of leaving her at Daniel’s by themselves makes me nervous, I know it’s illogical.
Daniel would ensure Danny was comfortable and happy and would take care of her just as much as I do.
We walk back to Danny’s room, and I kneel on the floor, watching as she arranges the stuffed animals by species on the bed.
“What do you think? Do you like it?”
The smile she gives me settles all of my worries. If it makes her happy, it makes me happy. Everything else is just noise.
And when I look up at Daniel standing in the doorway, looking at us with nothing but adoration in his eyes, I’m finished.
I knew I liked Daniel before. I knew I adored him before.
Right now?
Right now, I realize I’m in love with him.