Chapter 2
Darius
There’s only so much bad that the heart can take and I think I’ve reached my limit for one lifetime.
Grumbling under my breath, I slowly, achingly slowly, pull my tired body up off the mattress. It’s one of the best on the market and yet I might as well have curled up on a board with spikes for all the sleep I got.
I groan when my phone rings and I reach out to pick it up.
“Jesus, Darius. I’ve been trying to reach you for hours. What time do you get up?”
That soft, pretty voice that used to thrill me when I was a young boy gently finds its way into my ear and I close my eyes, feeling my heart race just like it used to every time I headed out to my best friend’s house to pick her up.
“Angel…” I whisper. She chuckles and the warm, husky sound makes me ache for the way we used to be. Two young, innocent kids who just liked to spend every day together.
I miss those days. Miss my friend.
“I don’t know why you always called me that, Armstrong. I’m the furthest thing from an angel that there is.”
“It’s because your cousin called you Harp for short. Like an angel plays a harp,” I laugh softly. It hurts my damn throat. It feels like forever since I’ve had any damn thing to laugh about.
Almost immediately guilt drags angry claws through my insides and I grit my teeth to keep the aching pain out of my voice.
“That’s…” Her voice stops and then she laughs. “That’s actually not bad. I can’t believe I was too stupid to figure that one out.”
“You aren’t stupid, angel.”
“You know what I meant, Armstrong.”
“You know you can call me Darius, Harper.”
“It’s been a long time.”
“Time doesn’t exist for people like us. We’ll always be friends, Harper.”
She doesn’t say anything for a minute and I wonder if she’s gonna ask me the question I know she’s always wanted to ask me.
The one I’m not sure that I can ever tell her.
I take a deep breath when she completely avoids it. “What are you doing right now?”
I sit up on the edge of the mattress and run my hand through my tousled curls. Grimacing, I push my memories to the back of my mind.
I’m not going there. NO damn way.
I run my hand down my bare chest like I’m sweeping away the ache. Like that’s even physically possible.
“I’m not doing anything. Just figuring out when I’m going to leave town.”
There’s nothing here for me now. I just buried my memories here in my hometown and I know that I could head home at any time.
But something’s still got me here. I’ve got a problem and it’s one that I have had for a long time.l
This woman on the phone. The reason I left town. The reason I married my ex and the reason that right now I feel like my guts have been ripped out of me.
“Why don’t you stay on a little longer, Armstrong? I think I’ve got something to keep you busy.”
“And what would that be, angel?” I lean back and let my mind wander. Maybe she’s finally figured out my secret.
Shaking my head, I yank my crazy thoughts back to the present. Just in time to hear Harper say, “We’ve been looking for someone to handle a little bit of reno on Floral Wonders. Kinda combining the spaces here and giving us both more room to work.”
“What’s that got to do with me?”
“You wanna job?”
I choke on the sip of water I was just taking and sputter. Wiping my mouth, I glare at the phone. “You want to hire me? Don’t you guys have handymen around here?”
“We do. But Fee and I have been having a hard time deciding who to hire. You’d be perfect. We both trust you.”
“I don’t need your pity,” I growl between gritted teeth.
“It’s not pity, dammit! You’re not listening to me, you idiot! Alright, fine. I’m sure we could find somebody else if we really wanted to. But why bother when you’ve got free time and you’re right here!”
“Your logic is astounding,” I grunt.
“Dammit, Darius Armstrong! Yes! Maybe there’s a little bit of pity in there but mostly I’m just trying to help you.
Trying to give you something to do so you don’t think…
” Her husky voice peters off and I swear I can see her pretty hazel gray eyes.
Fee’s eyes were always a little more bright and aqua than her cousin’s.
But there was always something about Harper. Something that made me want to take care of her.
Something that made me do the stupidest thing of my life.
“Are you even listening to me?”
“Yeah. What makes you think that I should stay and do this?”
She sighs, rough and a little unsteady. “I think we both kind of need each other right now, Darius.”
“I know what you think I need you for but what do you need me for?”
“We could all use a friend, don’t you think?”
Wise but dangerous words. Because although I married one woman and we had a life until she blew it up, I never stopped wondering how Harper was doing.
And wishing I could talk to her about some of my troubles. Even though some of them had a lot to do with her.
“I don’t know. But you might be right, Harp. How about I meet you at the shop tonight and we go have a bite to eat and talk about this?”
“I think that sounds like a great idea. I’ll see you in a little bit.”
Hanging up the phone, I stare at it, wondering if I’m really going to stay here and if I do, will I be able to just be friends with Harper.
I know I have to but she’s always been a dangerous addiction for me. And one that I have no damn business getting close to again.
I’ve already lost so much. I can’t lose her too. Even if that means that we can only talk to each other over the phone.
I can’t risk breathing the same air as her…without risking letting a secret that I’ve kept buried for years out to torture both of us with what might have been.
And I don’t have it in me to risk like that again.