Chapter 12
Evan woke up in the strange bedroom again. It took a few minutes to orient himself. By the time he’d showered and dressed in civilian clothes for the second day in a row, he realized it was Sunday. His entire world had turned upside down and twisted sideways in thirty-six hours.
He’d gone from confirmed bachelor to spending more time with his ex-wife in his arms than he had with any other woman in years. He’d changed more diapers than he had since Kylie had been potty-trained.
She was now gone.
Heat burned behind his eyes as he fought back the sorrow that tried to overtake him at every memory.
Anger quickly followed. He was angry with God for taking her too soon.
He was angry with himself for not spending more time with his daughter.
He was angry with Genevieve for preferring to stay on Coronado as a teacher and divorce him, rather than move across the country to keep their family whole.
You’re an ass. Her job was not the reason she wanted a divorce.
You were. The SEALs under your command were more important to you than she was.
Than your daughter. You realized it back then that she deserved a better man than you.
Time to step up, Evan Hubbard. There’s a baby who needs you, right now.
With a sense of urgency, he checked the time. Before he left Genevieve’s house last night, she’d told him to pick her up at eight. They were going to get Ian.
With the car seat in one hand and the directions in the other, he went to the rented SUV.
He’d spent some time last night online looking for the safest vehicle for transporting babies.
His two-door, high-end sports car didn’t make the list at all.
He was going to miss his high-performance car, riding in the California sunshine with the top down, rocking to his favorite bands.
Vivi would enjoy a trip on the Pacific Highway.
He’d take her for a ride before he sold the car outright or traded it in.
But he didn’t have to worry about that now. He had the rented SUV.
When he had the car seat securely facing backwards, he practiced lifting out the carrier portion and locking it back into place.
He didn’t want to look like an idiot in front of Genevieve or the nurses.
With his luck lately, Captain Thomas and every nurse who took care of Ian would show up and decide to walk them out.
Once they had Ian home and settled in his own bed, they needed to deal with Kylie.
Then came the business of the dead. He suddenly wondered if the monthly premiums on her life insurance policy were current.
Using his phone, he logged into his military pay to check the automatic allotment.
Thank Christ, the military could be trusted for distributing his money.
He glanced at some of the other allotments.
While their daughter was in college and living with Genevieve, he had continued to pay childcare.
He debated on stopping that automatic withdrawal, wondering how much Genevieve depended on that additional money every month.
The house had been paid off with an inheritance from her parents.
When they divorced, he had filed a quit claim deed, replacing his name with Kylie’s.
He wanted his daughter to always have a home.
He’d talk to his financial advisor and see if he could replace Kylie’s name with Ian’s on the educational account they’d started for their daughter the day she was born.
He mentally added her college to the growing list of people and institutions that needed to be notified of her death.
He wondered if Genevieve knew how to get hold of her girlfriends, or if she had many.
Scowling, he remembered that his ex-wife didn’t even know the name of Ian’s father.
But you don’t know either, asshole. You didn’t even know she was pregnant. You are…were…a terrible father.
His inner voice was really doing a number on him that morning.
A glance at his watch indicated to him it was time to go.
An hour and a half later, Evan and Genevieve settled Ian into his new crib.
“Christ, he looks so tiny in there,” he whispered to his ex-wife.
“I know.” She grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the room. “Marta is going to be here in just a few minutes. She released his hand and threw her arms around his neck. “I’m not sure I can do this.”
Confused and slightly panicked, Evan leaned back. “Meaning you’re not sure you can take care of Ian? I meant what I said. I promised you that I would be here to help. I haven’t got it figured out yet, but I thought we would tackle a schedule sometime today.”
Thinking quick, he offered, “I could sleep on the couch and I’ll take the early shift if that would be okay with you.
I only need a few hours’ sleep, but I do need to get up and run with the men a couple times a week.
I’ll take the monitor and care for the baby until two a.m. Does that work for you? ”
Without waiting for a response, he continued, “And when you’re ready to go back to work, we’ll hire a nanny to take care of him during the day while we’re both working. If you need to do something in the evenings, I’ll just take Ian to my house for the night.”
Genevieve stepped in and hugged him. “I’m so glad you have everything planned out because I hadn’t even thought beyond finding some cookies and lemonade to serve Marta. I’m sure there are so many decisions to be made.” She squeezed his neck, and nothing had felt so wonderful in ten years.
He needed Genevieve as much as she seemed to need him. Only their strength together could help them get through the next few hours.
When the doorbell rang, Genevieve leaped out of his arms and dashed down the steps.
Evan was surprised to see Vice Admiral Maddox, who was holding a file.
“Sorry to barge in on your meeting, but when Marta told me she was coming here this morning, I was hoping I could steal a few minutes of your time, Evan. Even though you haven’t physically taken command, the Pentagon and everybody else considers you the commanding officer of Group 1.
” He lifted the file folder. “I’ve already perused these, but you may want to look them over before you sign each. ”
His mentor stepped into the house and put his arm around Evan. “How are you holding up? You’ve been through a lot in the last few days.” His voice was just above a whisper as the two women chatted several feet in front of them.
“I’m fine, and so thankful for Marta. I haven’t lived here in years and wouldn’t know where to start,” Evan confessed.
“Sometimes it feels as though it was only yesterday when I had to do this for Carol. I’m here as a friend to help you through these decisions, not just as your commanding officer who needs a bunch of shit signed.”
Marta was a wealth of knowledge and understanding.
It only took an hour to solidify their plans.
Because of the autopsy, they decided the best thing would be a cremation, which would take several days.
They decided that they would have a memorial service at the chapel on base and she would be interred in a nearby columbarium.
When Genevieve and Martha started looking through pictures to be used at the memorial service, Evan and his boss stepped to the dining room table and dove into the paperwork.
Ian’s tiny whimpers came over the monitor and Genevieve ran upstairs to attend him with Marta right behind her.
Evan promised that he would get the baby next time.
With the women gone, Evan went to the front closet and pulled out the Navy blue bag with all Kylie’s personal effects.
He extracted his daughter’s phone. “I’m asking you as a friend, do you know anyone who can get into this phone?
I’d like to know if there’s any trace of who Kylie spoke with, texts, voicemail, anything from last summer that might lead me to Ian’s father.
He has a right to know that he has a son. ”
At the sound of the women returning, Vice Admiral Maddox stuffed Kylie’s phone into his pocket. “I know just the man. You do, too. This should be child’s play for DD.”
“Fuck, yes. I don’t know why I didn’t think of DigiDef.
” Clem Nealson had been helping SpecOps teams around the world for years, ever since an IED had put him in a wheelchair and killed the rest of his SEAL platoon.
The Digital Defender, as they liked to call him, had helped several of Evan’s men out of tight spots all over the world.
Although Clem had been two years ahead of Evan at West Point, he and Trevor Maddox had been best friends throughout his whole career.
DD could seemingly work magic with his computers.
“Your brain has been in a hundred different places. I’ll get this out to DD today.” Vice Admiral Maddox rose from the table and grabbed the folder. “You know where I am. Don’t hesitate to call or drop in.”
Later that afternoon, the base chaplain came to the house since they couldn’t leave with a newborn. Evan left the service decisions to Genevieve while he fed the baby, occasionally chiming in with an opinion.
By suppertime, he and Genevieve had established a routine with their grandson’s care.
“Would you mind if I went into work for a few hours tomorrow morning? I believe we have everything set for the funeral.” Evan then suggested, “I’ll take care of the baby in the afternoon. You need a break. Go shopping?—”
“Oh, my word.” Genevieve grabbed her phone. “I was supposed to go to Saturday Market with Valerie yesterday.” She walked into the other room, Evan assumed to call Valerie, whoever that was, and apologize.