Chapter 33
Chapter Thirty-Three
They’d both come back. Autumn had truly expected to go back to nothing. She’d been at lessons with Love for two weeks and hadn’t been able to shake the dread that she would be abandoned the entire time. She would have understood, she’d given them their freedom and they shouldn’t have come back.
But they were both there, and Autumn was frozen just inside the door into the throne room. She couldn’t breathe, wanted to run, but wasn’t sure which direction she wanted to go. Wasn’t sure if she wanted to run from them, or into their arms.
Auster still didn’t love her, but he’d come back. That was the part that made no sense. Maybe he was only here because he loved Boreus? He could have loved Boreus and not come back. It made no sense.
“Come here, Autumn.” Love beckoned to her. “They are here for you and deserve to hear your words.”
She made herself move, made herself walk until she stopped between Love’s throne and the men she loved. But she didn’t have any words, they’d all abandoned her.
Auster rose, looking at her briefly before reaching out and pulling her into his arms. “I care for you, Autumn.”
“I love you,” she whispered. “I’m sorry.”
“Why?” He pulled back to look at her. “You don’t need to apologize to me for that.”
“You don’t,” she said, trying to keep the shake from her voice. “You don’t need me?—”
“I do,” he stopped her with a finger on her lips. “I need you. I need Autumn to be my anchor in this life. I will keep trying, but you have to not run from me.”
She sighed, dropping her head to rest on his chest. Love had told her, over and over, that his trying was a good sign.
Reminding her of all the times she’d had to try to keep her love bright, especially when they had abandoned her.
That the reason she didn’t have to try now was because her love was old, stable, and Auster’s was new.
She had to let him try, had to let both of them try, and she wasn’t allowed to run for at least six months as mortals reckoned time.
That was the deal she had made with Love.
That if at the end of six months, he still couldn’t look at her and tell her he loved her, the Highest would help her press her case for dissolution.
And she wasn’t allowed to tell them she’d made that deal or Love would invalidate it.
She had to try, honestly, for six months, and though she knew it would make no difference to the way he felt, she would follow the dictates of the bargain she’d made.
“Let’s go home,” Boreus came up on her other side and wrapped his arms around her. “We have something to show you.”
They all left the throne room, bowing to the Highest one last time. When they made it outside, Boreus stopped her and tied a long strip of black cloth over her eyes.
“It’s a surprise.” He whispered in her ear. “Just trust us for a little while.”
She nodded, feeling them take her hands and lead her out and across the meadow. She wasn’t sure where they were going, but they had asked for her trust, and she had sworn to try.
Eventually they stopped, and the strip of cloth dropped from her eyes as Boreus untied it. The sun was bright, climbing the sky, and it took her eyes a moment to adjust before she could make out what they wanted to show her.
It was their home. On the little rise above the spring. It wasn’t just lines in the earth now; it was walls and a roof, floors and rooms, color and light.
“You—” she turned to them, wiping at the tears. “You raised our home?”
“We wanted you to know we thought of you while you were gone.” Boreus reached for her, pulling her into a hug. “We can still change any of it you want, but we thought about you while you were away.”
They took her hands again, leading her inside, letting her poke herself into all the corners.
Tearing up again when she saw the little bed for Solace in the corner of their bedroom.
Solace was overjoyed to see her, leaping up from the little bed and frisking around her, sniffing every part of her he could reach.
Autumn knelt, wrapping her arms around his neck. Even if, at the end, they decided that they didn’t love her, she would still have Solace. Hopefully Eleni would take care of him once she was gone.
But she wasn’t going to think about that right now.
She was going to turn and face them, try to be someone they could love honestly.
She would love them, no matter what happened in the end.
But she knew, all too well, that if you loved something or someone, sometimes it was just best to let them go.
She had six months, and she would love them as hard as she could for every minute of those six months. And then she would be gone, hopefully the memory she would become would make them smile.
“Autumn?” Auster broke her thoughts. “What are you thinking about?”
“The passage of time.” She said, trying to think of a way to be honest. “I hoped that eventually I could help you be happy.”
Even if the reason that they were happy was that she was gone.
Six months. She repeated that to herself. She had to sincerely try to love them for the next six months.
She rose, patting Solace on the head, to turn to Auster and try to smile. “I suppose we should start over?”
“That’s a good idea.” He walked closer to her, took her hand, and bowed over it. “Walk with me?”
Autumn nodded, squeezing his hand as Boreus came to take her other hand.
Six months to love them.