Chapter 5
LIA
I’m sitting in Mom’s living room a few days later, tired and sweaty from an afternoon of cleaning.
She sat on the couch during this, her knees pulled to her chest, big over-ear headphones on as she watched and rewatched videos of Evan.
I try not to resent her. She’s lost her son.
But what about me? She’s like a ghost, staring.
If it wasn’t for me supporting her, working double and even triple shifts…
I push that thought away before it can fully form. The last thing I want to do is resent the only family I have left.
I stand, putting my magazine down. I was hoping she might take off the headphones and ask me how work has been. Or if I’m seeing someone. Or… something, anything.
Maybe she could ask me how work’s going and I could explain about the strange series of events.
I could tell her there’s a young man who looks like Evan, who was hit by a car just like Evan, except this young man has survived.
He’s not conscious—probably for the best if people are out to get him—but he’s here.
I could tell her about the even stranger man who won’t leave my mind. Maksim with his cool eyes and his dangerous demeanor. Part of me wishes that I’d given him my phone number. And it’s not a small part either. But I can’t let myself be swept along by a dark, mysterious stranger.
Soon, it’s time to leave. I lean down and kiss Mom on the forehead. She barely stirs, reaching up and stroking her hand down my forearm and over my hand for a moment. Then she turns her full attention back to her phone.
As I walk to my car, I think about my little brother, his smiling face and his enthusiasm when talking about animals. He was flitting between college courses when he finally decided on veterinary science. And he was sticking to it. He was trying.
I sit behind the wheel, tears sliding down my cheeks.
A sob doesn’t escape me. These are silent tears, the sort I’m used to crying.
I just wish I had someone to cling to. I find myself thinking of him again.
Imagining him pulling me against his firm body, wrapping his arms around me, stroking his hand through my hair.
It’s like I can feel him against me. I try to reason with myself. I don’t know anything about him. We’ve had a few conversations, that’s it. It says a lot about me that the closest person I can think of is a mysterious, angry stranger.
I have friends… technically. But after saying no dozens of times to their plans, it feels like they’re asking me out of obligation now. I can’t blame them. I’m at the hospital more than I’m at home.
“Try to get some sleep,” Joel says as I leave the hospital the next day, a big smile on his face. It seems forced, his eyes filled with a plea. Let’s just pretend everything is normal…
“I’ll do my best,” I say, with a weak smile of my own.
Instead of walking to my car, I decide to head across the street and walk through the park. The sun has already set. It’s peaceful. I wonder what it would be like to have a dog. Evan was talking about getting one toward the end.
I walk to the pond, looking down at the stars and moonlight reflected in it. They’re beautiful. I imagine an arm wrapped around me, pulling me close, as we take in this scene together.
I know what I’m doing. Romanticizing a stranger because it’s easier than dealing with the cold reality of what dating would feel like.
I cringe at the thought of sitting opposite a man, trying to make myself sound interesting.
Work, work, work—and do you have any hobbies?
Sometimes, I buy my mom some groceries… then the light would fade from their eyes.
This is all moot. I don’t want to date. I just want… something, a connection, a chance to feel normal.
My phone vibrates in my pocket.
Unknown: Don’t move.
I freeze, biting down. My chest goes tight as my heart hammers. I’ve got an idea who this is, obviously. It could be the pale man who threatened Joel’s family.
Lia: Why?
I glance over my shoulder. I don’t see anybody.
Unknown: You’re in danger. Someone’s following you.
Lia: How do you know that?
Unknown: Because I’m following you too.
I grip the railing that surrounds the pond, holding it tightly, the metal biting into my hands.
Turning, I think about running back to my car. Then my phone vibrates again.
Unknown: If you run now, they’ll know you’re suspicious. Walk calmly through the park and toward the parking lot. I swear, Lia, I won’t let anyone hurt you.
Lia: Maksim?
I'm hoping it’s him. But he asked for my number. Did he get it somehow anyway? He obviously has power and connections.
Lia: Is this you?
Unknown: Just do as I say.
If it is him, maybe he can’t admit it over the phone.
Unknown: I’ve given you my word.
Fear grips me. Life has been stressful enough without adding shadowy attackers to the mix. I start to walk, my legs shaky. But I don’t want to let it show. I try to look relaxed, like this is just any other evening.
Lia: I need to know who you are. You could be tricking me.
Unknown: I’m someone who admires your fire, Lia.
He, I realize… that’s an assumption.
Unknown: I admire your ability to stare down scary men and show no fear. Do that now.
If this is Maksim, those words mean a lot to me. A shiver runs down my body.
I put one foot in front of the other, over and over…
It’s all I can do.