Chapter 44 #2
“He didn’t actually kiss me. He just made it look like he might. I was actually really disappointed about that.” I have a horrifying thought. “Did Chase and Ryder know I had a crush?”
“They’re guys. They were probably clueless.” Olivia says.
I shrug, looking down at my half-eaten sugar-free cupcake. “It’s new. I don’t want to get ahead of myself.”
Daisy laughs. When I turn to her accusingly, she abruptly stops. “Sorry. It’s just, have you seen the way he looks at you? He’s as obsessed as you are. More. He’s never looked at any girl like that. Not even close. That boy is down bad.”
“I don’t know,” Sadie says with an arch of her brow. “Maybe Emma has a right to worry. I mean, Sebastian’s always been a manwhore. He might not be the loyal type.”
I huff out a breath. “I can’t believe you’re saying that about Sebastian.
He’s been so good to you. He’s one of the most loyal guys I know,” I bluster.
“He’s always there for his friends, no matter what.
He never gives up on anyone or judges them.
He has the best heart. Look at all the good he does.
It’s because of him and that bonkers amount of money he deposited in my account that we can set up Grace Foundation.
He also continues to show up for his parents, no matter how awful they are. And—”
“Easy there, tiger.” Sadie grins at me. “I thought you might have a few things to say about me dissing your man.”
I glare. “You were baiting me.”
“Maybe.”
“Oh, she’s down bad,” Daisy says.
“So down bad,” Olivia echoes.
“It’s just… I know how to be an assistant to a star. But I don’t know how to be in a relationship with a star. I twirl my now-empty champagne glass. “When I’m…”
“Just a girl?” Daisy teases.
Olivia smiles gently. “I don’t fit into the Hollywood scene either, and I never have.”
“That’s the thing. Chase is like you. Neither of you want a big, glossy Hollywood life. But Sebastian was built for one. He doesn’t do small. I’ve always imagined he’d be with someone who could be part of his world.”
“And do you do small?” Daisy asks, sounding skeptical.
And just like that, the simple question rocks me.
I’ve been in the background for so long, I always assumed that’s just who I am.
It’s been my comfort zone. I learned early that it’s safest to shrink.
To hide. To not stand out in any way. But now I realize that with my new business, I’m front and center.
I have to show up and be seen. I have to lead. Take the spotlight.
And I love it, I realize.
“No,” I say after a minute, shocked by the insight.
“I don’t think I actually do. Not anymore.
” I pause. “That was one of the problems with being Sebastian’s assistant.
I wanted more.” I turn to Sadie. “The vision I have for Dream Space isn’t small.
It’s huge. I want to help a lot of people, not just a few. ”
Sadie claps. “Same, partner. You and Sebastian are both built for big things. You just want to conquer different landscapes.”
“It’s all about compromise,” Daisy says, nodding.
“Ryder loves touring. But we make it work. It takes a lot of coordination. He stays home more now, but he gets a lot more songwriting and studio work done. And I join him on the road. It’s not easy to design dresses in a tour bus, but I also get inspired with all that travel.
It’s so worth it.” She looks dreamy. “So, so, so worth it.”
“Yeah,” Olivia breathes, the same soft gleam in her eyes. “It’s worth it.”
“Don’t mind me. I’m going to jump off a cliff because I don’t have a superstar Sexiest Man Alive who would do anything for me like the three of you.” Sadie grins.
“Well, I haven’t heard from my superstar in… ” I look at the time on my phone and see that it’s midnight. “In almost twenty-three hours.”
I’m about to put the phone back down when I see a flurry of notifications come through. Curious, I open one up. It’s Matt. I thought you should see this. I click the link.
And suck in my breath. I read the entire article in shock, blood draining from my face.
“What is it?” Sadie asks.
I hand her my device with shaking hands. When she’s done reading, she looks up in anger “The fucker,” she spits out. “I always hated him. But now I really hate him.”
“Who? Why? What did we miss?” Daisy asks.
Sadie’s shoulders are tense as she looks at me.
“Celebrity Newz wanted to find out more about Sebastian Blake’s fiancée.
And they did. Apparently, my ex-boyfriend, who is now a personal trainer, talked about me on some podcast because of the rumors that I’m engaged to Sebastian,” I say shakily.
“He ghosted me when he went away to college. And I never knew why. But now I do.”
“Emma…” Sadie says.
I look down at the article, skimming it.
“Apparently he was shocked to hear that someone like me was engaged to a movie star. He said when we were together I was kind of pathetic. Because my aunt was a hoarder and my dad was a drug addict. And apparently, he was only with me for so long because he didn’t know how to break it off.
He felt sorry for me. He also said that I look better now than I did when I was in high school, but I’m still not that hot. ”
I try to breathe through the rising anger and consternation. This podcast may have been small, just two gym-bros talking life and fitness. But the story has now been picked up by one of the biggest tabloid publications. Everyone will see this.
“The dick!” Daisy yells.
“We have your back. We’ll ride at dawn,” Olivia vows.
Sadie wraps an arm around me. “You were always too good for him.”
I’m mortified that my background has been laid bare for all the world to see.
Mortified that I’m finding out with everyone else exactly why I was ghosted all those years ago.
Contrary to what Sadie just said, I always felt lesser in that relationship.
I always sensed that he thought I was lesser. And now I know I was right.
Every negative thought I’d ever had about myself. The judgment and shame of my childhood. They all resurface. They’re all there in one short clickbait article being shared and quoted across the tabloids.
All because my ex is an ass—and Sebastian Blake is one of the biggest stars in the world.
My phone pings out of control. Then it rings. I don’t recognize the number, so I don’t answer it. It rings again, and I put it on silent. It’s probably the media wanting me to comment. I look at my friends, feeling at a loss.
“I’ve been dealing with the press for years so maybe this shouldn’t rattle me, but it does.” My laugh is mirthless. “I thought unflattering photos were bad. But I’ve never been the subject of an article like this.”
And then it strikes me. Sebastian is confronted with this all the time. Since he was a child, he’s had to deal with friends, employees, and even strangers revealing the most intimate details about his life. A wave of awe for how he handles it flows through me.
Daisy snatches the phone from my hand and sets it behind her.
“I’m taking this and hiding it. The best thing to do is to go unplugged.
I learned that after I accidentally divulged too much about Ryder and our sex life to a reporter.
I didn’t mean to overshare. But the lady seemed so nice, and she didn’t tell me who she was.
We were chatting. Alcohol was involved. The subject of size came up.
Oops. Anyway, after that Ryder surprised me with an impromptu vacation to the Maldives for a week because there was no cell service on the island.
” She makes a face. “There were a few other not-so-cute moments when the tabloids got nosy about my background. But with Ryder’s support, I got through it.
And it made me stronger.” She squeezes my hand.
“Let Sebastian’s team manage the situation.
And stay off social media. This too shall pass. I promise.”
Olivia comes over and gives me a hug. “It’s the price of being with our men.
It does suck. But, like we said before, it’s worth it.
It’s not something that goes away, but you get better at dealing with it.
And Daisy’s right. There is a silver lining.
You get clear on what’s worth your time and who your friends are. You can handle this.”
I want to ask for my phone back so I can wait for Sebastian to call or message. But I decide that Daisy’s right. I’m only going to be tempted to check social media. And no good will come of that.
I still feel shaky, but I straighten my shoulders. “Okay. Hide my phone for the night.”
Daisy nods her approval. “You won’t regret it. I promise. I’ll turn it off and put it somewhere you’ll never find. Should I hide your laptop as well?”
“That’s going too far. And I’m not logged onto social media on my computer.”
“Sadie, I’ll tell you where it is and you can give the phone back to Emma when you think she’s ready to have access. The first twenty-four hours are the most crucial.”
“Will do,” Sadie says. “Time will do the trick. And wine.” She holds the bottle of red wine up. “Anyone want a refill?”
We all grab our glasses.