25. Twenty-five
Twenty-five
September 2022
Connor Kelly
M y face is sweating. I haven’t exerted myself—at all—so why is my face betraying me like this?
I’m so self-conscious of the fact I gave a pretty abysmal impression when I had dinner with Fee’s family a few months ago that I’m a hot mess right now.
It’s Fee’s twenty-sixth birthday today, so Archie, Alice, Jade and his brothers are coming over for dinner tonight. In a rare moment of kiss-assery, I offered to cook, and now I’m on the verge of breaking out in hives in case I fuck it all up.
“What time is everyone gettin’ here?” I ask Fee for the tenth time today.
“Half six, the same time as when you last asked.” I think his patience is wearing thin.
“Right. Sorry. Why is the house so fuckin’ hot?” I say, tugging my collar away from my neck.
“It’s not hot. You’re just getting yourself worked up over nothing.” I glare at him, but he rolls his eyes in response. “It’s my birthday. You aren’t allowed to scowl at me.” I plaster a fake smile onto my face and crinkle my eyes sarcastically.
“Better?” I ask. He walks towards me from the bedroom doorway, where he’s been watching me try on every combination of clothing I own. His palms cup my face, and he kisses me briefly.
“Why are you so nervous anyway? You’ve already met them.”
“I was too busy actin’ like a bitter hag to really care what they thought of me. Now I have this horrible bitchy voice in my head tellin’ me they’ll hate me forever, and then eventually you’ll be like, ‘hmm, maybe they have a point,’ and then you’ll also hate me forever. And then how awkward will it be to be married and livin' together when you hate me?” I take a deep breath after speaking at a hundred miles per hour. Fee only laughs at me.
“I’m not saying they’ll hate you because I really don’t think they will. But even if they do, I don’t need their approval. I love you, Alice loves you; anyone who spends any lengthy amount of time with you loves you, too.”
“Ahh, so you’re saying nobody likes me right away. I grow on people. Like a tumour.”
“Yes, that’s exactly what I said. Just be yourself, babe. But maybe don’t mention tumours over dinner.”
“‘Be myself,’ ‘don’t mention tumours,’ why don’t you hand me a self-help book while you’re at it,” I say, letting out a disgruntled huff.
“And after they’ve all left, I’m going to bring you back in here, take my time undressing you, tease you until you forget your own name. And then I’m going to fuck you into the mattress.”
My jaw drops, and I must resemble a goldfish.
Fee and I haven’t fucked since our wedding night fiasco six months ago. We’ve done pretty much everything else but that, and now I’m nervous about this, too. He gently grips my chin between his thumb and index finger and presses his lips to mine in a quick but passionate kiss.
“Great, now I’m hard. Thanks for that,” I say, adjusting myself so I’m not tenting my trousers. Thank fuck for boxer briefs with a tight waistband.
“Bet you aren’t thinking about my family anymore, though?” He winks at me, looking far too pleased with himself.
Our dining table sits to the side of the living room by the front window; it’s not really equipped to seat seven people, so it’s a bit of a squeeze this evening. Most of our guests are sitting enjoying a glass of wine while Archie and I dish everything up in the kitchen. I’ve cooked slow-roasted duck legs in a red wine jus with creamy mashed potatoes and green beans because, apparently, I’m a total brown noser.
“Wow. I lived here for weeks, and you never cooked anything this fancy,” Archie says, eyeing up the food. He’s right, I think the fanciest meal he got from me was bangers and mash, but I squawk indignantly anyway.
“You’re Scottish. Your people eat deep-fried Mars bars,” I point out, and he chuckles under his breath. Ever since he opened up to Fee and officially joined our pack, he’s slowly but surely become more relaxed around us. I was worried he might be nervous around strangers tonight, but he seems to be taking it all in stride so far.
Phoenix Campbell
“That was delicious. Thanks, Connor,” Jade says as she and Jasper start clearing the plates away.
“Glad you enjoyed it,” he replies, blushing at the compliment. The food really was delicious. It’s funny to think that after so many years together, I thought I knew everything about him, yet the secrecy of our relationship left certain stones unturned. It wasn’t until we started living together that I had any idea Cee could cook. It was a very pleasant surprise.
In the past few weeks, he even started making extra portions so I could take leftovers for lunch. In typical Cee fashion, he never mentioned it; I just opened the fridge one morning, and there was some Tupperware with a Post-it note with my name on it. I figured he’d made too much, but every morning, I open the fridge, and there’s my lunch.
I know I never stopped loving him, but these past few months, he’s reminded me of why I fell for him in the first place. He loves quietly, but in a way that makes me feel cherished and cared for. He buys my favourite shampoo when he sees I’m running low, he rubs my shoulders when he knows I’ve had a stressful day, and he mended a hole in my flannel shirt the other day because he knows it’s my favourite.
I think it’s all the little things compounded that have made me realise I’m ready for us to have sex again. We aren’t in the same place we were at six months ago, and I’m finally ready for us to move forward.
“Hey Fee, could you come into the kitchen for a moment?” Cee calls from the doorway to the kitchen.
“Fee?” Jasper mouths to me. Everyone except Cee has only ever called me Phoenix or Nix for short; it hadn’t really crossed my mind anyone would notice.
“One sec,” I tell Jas, and then I head into the kitchen to see what Cee is after. “What’s up?”
“We don’t own enough bowls.” Cee looks wide-eyed and panicked—over bowls…
“Okay… Can’t we use the side plates instead?”
“We only have six side plates.”
“What if we use six bowls, and I’ll use a side plate?”
“That will look ridiculous. I knew how many people were coming. Why didn’t I buy more bowls?” he asks, sounding quite hysterical.
“Because we rarely have more than two guests at a time, so buying more bowls for one dinner is excessive,” I point out.
“You are no help. Shoo,” he says, shoving me back out of the kitchen. I love him, but he is ludicrous sometimes.
After we’ve all stuffed ourselves with the birthday cake Alice made (Cee eating his portion on a side plate—the horror!), we all settle into the living room. It turns out Cee's apprehension was unwarranted. The whole evening has been lovely, and it’s been nice spending some quality time with my family.
We only have one large sofa and an armchair in the living room, so Cee is sitting on the floor between my legs. I’m playing with his hair, running my fingers through the soft strands, and he leans into the touch. Magnus seems to have befriended Alice and is curled up on her lap, purring away to my right. Jas keeps giving me curious glances, and I’m not sure what that’s about.
“Who wants to re-watch Twilight and mock it mercilessly?” Cee asks everyone in the room. He gets an enthusiastic “Yes” from Alice and Jade. Archie just smiles and says, “Sure,” while Alfie groans.
“Can’t we watch the latest Jurassic World film?” Alfie suggests, hopefully. He’s met with a resounding no from the rest of the room.
“As fun as that sounds,” Jas says sarcastically, “I’m going to steal the birthday boy for a walk.” I get a pit in my stomach because Jas is acting strange.
“Okay, sure,” I agree, knowing I need to hear what he has to say because it’s already putting me on edge.
“Want us to wait and start the film when you get back?” Cee asks.
“Nah, it’s okay. You guys go ahead,” I reply and kiss the top of his head as I get up.
“I’m just gonna call my parents quickly to make sure Henry settled alright,” Jade says to Jasper before giving him a peck on the cheek as she leaves the room.
The weather is fairly mild for late September, but I think it would most definitely be too cold for a late-night walk if we were human. We head down the garden path in silence, and then I lead us towards a footpath that starts across the road. It’s a clear night with only a crescent moon, and this far away from any city lights, the stars shine brightly in the sky. It’s stunning, and I wish I could take a photo that would do it justice.
“So, why the ominous walk?” I ask nervously after a few minutes. Jas takes a deep breath and then blows it out.
“It’s him, isn’t it?”
“You’ll need to be more specific. What is who?”
“Years ago, when Jade and I were getting our house renovated, we were living at Mum and Dad’s for a few months, and you used to sneak out, sometimes all night. You were going to meet Connor, weren’t you?” I’m not sure what I was expecting from this conversation, but it wasn’t this. I can’t even fathom why he’d be thinking back to then; it was so long ago.
“Erm…” I stumble over my words, not sure how to answer this. There seems little point in lying, but I feel as if anything I say will give him more questions than answers. Sighing, I answer him honestly, “Yes. It was him. What on earth made you guess that after all this time?”
“Wow.” He blinks at me, wide-eyed. “I kind of figured, but hearing you say it is just… Wow.” We walk further down the footpath in silence as he gathers his thoughts. “At first, I thought it was strange how comfortable the two of you seemed so quickly. Then tonight, he kept calling you ‘Fee,’ like he’d been saying it forever. And his scent has always been so familiar, but I could never quite place from when or where. I assumed I must have crossed paths with him before, and it all sort of clicked tonight.” Sometimes, Jas seems like he can’t see what’s under his own nose, and other times, I’m blown away by how perceptive he is. I exhale a deep breath. It’s a lot to explain.
I go with the truth, and I tell him almost everything; how we met, how we were together for almost four years, how we broke up when I got engaged to Niamh, and how we didn’t speak again until the day before we got married.
“Why did you agree to marry Niamh? You obviously love him. I don’t get why you wouldn’t just refuse. They could have found another way.”
I debate answering this part honestly. With the Order passed, I can speak about it without gagging on the words, but I don’t want to cause a rift. Nevertheless, I also need to know this isn’t something Jas will ever do to someone when he becomes Alpha.
“My Alpha Ordered it. I didn’t have a choice. Connor still doesn’t know.” I confess quietly, as though my mum could be hiding around the corner and hear me. I know I’ve dropped a bombshell on him.
“Mum did fucking, what?” he asks.
“You heard me correctly, Jas.” I sigh.
“What the fuck? She broke the law? She violated the pack bond. How could she do that? She’s the one who taught me I should never do that.” Jasper’s voice is raised in anger. I don’t blame him, but it makes me feel raw to hash it all out again.
“I know, okay? I know. But it’s in the past, and we can’t change it. I need you to keep this to yourself, though,” I plead with him.
“Fuck. How are things okay with you and Connor if he doesn’t even know?”
“I think, in his own way, he’s forgiven me for it. He cut off all contact with me for a year. Then he spent a week being pretty vicious and horrible to me. And over the last six months, we’ve sort of just slowly ended up in a better place.”
It’s the first time I’ve really acknowledged to myself how huge it is that Cee has forgiven me when he thinks I was going to voluntarily marry his twin sister. I’ve thought of telling him the truth plenty of times since we got back together, but it feels like picking at a scab that will inevitably get infected, and things are so good between us at the moment.
“Damn. He’s a better man than I am. I don’t think I’d have moved past that.”
“Yeah, I’m very lucky. It got ugly there for a while, but now I’m married to my best friend, so it’s hard to be too upset about how we got here,” I say with a small smile playing on my lips, remembering how Cee worried himself sick over making a good impression on my family tonight.
“I’m glad you’re happy, but I think you should tell him the truth,” Jas replies. I’m surprised by the suggestion, given what’s at stake if this gets out.
“Why? Surely, the fewer people who know about this, the better.”
“I know it came from a good place, but I honestly don’t think you had the right to keep that from him. If all that shit had gone down, and I’d only known half the facts, it would have driven me insane, trying to piece it all together.” I can feel myself getting defensive, but I don’t want to argue. I really don’t see what good it would do to tell Cee now, even if I can feel the truth to Jasper’s words. I can’t go back in time and tell him at a point where knowing could have eased some of his pain. What’s done is done. “I didn’t say that to make you feel guilty. Most of the time, though, an ugly truth is better than a pretty lie.”
He wraps his arm around my shoulder and gives it a squeeze. I don’t even know what to say to that. Since we’re having a heart-to-heart, I brace myself and ask him something that’s been nagging at me for a while.
“Are you happy?”
“Sure. Why wouldn’t I be?”
“Things with you and Jade have seemed a bit strained ever since the wedding. I thought maybe you’d had a fight that day, but things have felt weird between the two of you ever since. You know you can talk to me, right?” Jasper sighs but doesn’t reply right away. We keep walking along the path in silence for a few minutes.
“Things are… complicated. Cee's your mate, isn’t he?” he asks, the abrupt topic change, taking me by surprise.
“Yeah, we haven’t completed the bond or anything, but he is. Always knew he was, to be honest. Jade isn’t yours, is she?”
“No. But we always knew that. I love her, though, more than anything.” A sympathetic pit forms in my stomach for my brother.
He’s come across his mate, and it isn’t his wife.
“Does she know?” He nods. “Do I know them?”
“I’m not really ready to talk about it. I made a commitment to Jade, and I’ve got Henry to think about.” With no words to make the situation any better, I pause on the path and pull him into a hug.
After everyone has gone home, I sneak up behind Cee as he finishes loading the dishwasher.
“Leave it until tomorrow. My plans require you to be in our bed,” I whisper in his ear as I wrap my arms around his waist.
“Who am I to deny the birthday boy?” He smirks but turns to face me and wraps his arms around my neck, bringing my lips to his in a soft kiss. I grab the backs of his thighs, and he wraps his legs around my waist as I carry him up the stairs koala style.
Lowering him onto the mattress, I start to fulfil my promise from earlier. Cee's chest rises and falls quickly, and he gets a pink blush on his cheeks as I slowly undress him. He starts unbuttoning his shirt, but I grab his wrists and pin them to the mattress above his head.
“Oi! Stop trying to unwrap my birthday present,” I say playfully.
“How rude of me,” he says breathily but with a hint of amusement. I finish unbuttoning his shirt and then undo his belt and trousers. As I pull them off him, I remove his socks and place a kiss on the arch of his foot. I watch as his skin breaks out in goosebumps in response. Palming his cock over his boxer briefs, I watch as a small wet patch appears where his precum seeps through.
As I pull off his underwear, I lick my lips at the sight of his full, hard cock. I gently kiss the tip, and Cee grips the sheets in his fists.
“Jesus, you look so hot laid out for me like this, my favourite dessert,” I tell him and then lick a stripe up his shaft. Working my way up his body, I run my tongue along the divot between his abs. I kiss his neck, and my teeth ache to bite him at the juncture between his neck and shoulder.
To mark him so everyone knows he’s mine.
When I make it to his mouth, I’m hungry for him. My tongue seeks out his, and I drag my teeth along his bottom lip, tugging on it. I could wax poetic about Cee's bottom lip; it’s much fuller than his top and has a line in the centre that makes me want to bite it. The way they go rosy red after bruising kisses, and the way they stretch around me when he sucks my cock, is the stuff of my filthiest dreams.
As I make my way back down his body, I suck and nibble on his nipples until he’s mumbling nonsense at me. Each time he tries to touch his cock, I move his hands back above his head. By the time I suck on the tip of his cock, swirling my tongue around the glans, he’s writhing under me, and my own dick is aching for release.
Connor Kelly
He’s trying to torture me.
I’m so turned on that my skin is a raging inferno, and I can hardly form the words I need to tell him to hurry the fuck up and fill me with his cock. He grips my thighs and pushes them back, exposing my hole, but only for a moment before he presses his tongue to me. I groan at the sensation; it’s both too much and not enough. He continues to lick and push his tongue inside me, and I’m so overstimulated and desperate to come that a tear rolls down my cheek.
Fee grabs the lube from the bedside table and then pushes his slippery index finger inside me. He’s kneeling on the floor with my arse pulled right to the edge of the bed, intently watching as his finger plunges in and out of me. Fee has always gotten off on watching any part of himself moving in and out of my hole. Back when we first started having sex, I used to get a bit self-conscious, but it’s hard to feel that way at present when his pupils are blown wide with desire, and he looks at me like I’m the centre of his universe.
Once he’s added more lube, a second finger joins the first, and he starts stretching me out. As usual, Fee is stubbornly more thorough than I can take when it comes to prepping me.
“Please, just fuck me already,” I stammer, already feeling completely wrecked. I can’t take the build-up anymore.
“No. We haven’t done this in a long time. I’m going to make sure you’re ready,” Fee says, and his tone leaves no room for argument. I’m tempted to point out that with shifter healing, even if we went too fast, I’d be healed before we even finished. However, the past would indicate he will not take that as a good enough reason, so I try to be patient—to be good for him.
I’m so fucking horny right now that I’m riding his fingers, desperate and pleading for more. Fee changes the angle so he’s grazing his fingertips over my prostate, and my hips buck up off the bed.
“Fuck. Please hurry up. I’m gonna die if I don’t come soon.” The words spill out of my mouth in a garbled mess, but he adds a third finger, so I know we’re almost there.
Once Fee’s content I’m sufficiently prepped, he pours the lube onto his throbbing cock. He grabs a pillow, shoving it under my hips and pulls me to the edge of the mattress where he’s standing. Lining his cock up with my hole, he slowly pushes inside me. I’m so aroused right now he thrusts all the way into me with ease.
I revel in the sensation of being so full. The way my rim stretches around him, and I can feel him everywhere. There’s something peaceful about all my thoughts centring on how he’s so deep inside me, filling me. Encompassing me entirely.
“Baby, you’re so tight. Give me a second, or this is going to be over way too fast,” Fee says, and he closes his eyes, taking deep breaths. I can’t help but laugh at his look of concentration, causing me to clench around him. “Fuck, fuck, fuck. Don’t do that,” he groans. I tug on my cock gently, not enough to give me any real relief, but just enough friction to take the edge off. Fee looks down at where our bodies are joined and—fucking finally—starts moving.
He goes slow, pulling almost all the way out before sliding all the way back in again. It’s sweet, sweet torture as the head of his dick pegs my prostate, and I shift my hips to try and seek out more of the sensation. Keeping the same angle so he hits me just right, his thrusts get faster and faster. I can feel the pressure building inside me, my orgasm close—too close.
“Fuck, I’m not gonna last long if you keep fuckin' me like this.”
Fee pulls out and crawls onto the bed. He sits so his back is to the headboard with his legs stretched out in front of him.
“Ride me,” he says, panting. I move quickly, straddling him backwards because I know he’ll enjoy the view as I slide up and down his length. I ride him slowly at first, enjoying the change in sensation in this position. When I sink all the way to the base of his cock, I feel impossibly full. Fee grabs my hips, his fingertips digging in as he encourages me to ride him faster.
I moan loudly and grab the lube. Covering my cock in the slippery liquid, I jerk myself off—hard and fast. When Fee begins to thrust up into me, my orgasm builds quickly.
“Fuck, I’m gonna come. Don’t stop,” I tell him. Seconds later, every muscle in my body tenses before releasing, cum shooting out of me and covering my hand. My chest heaves, and my feet are tingling. All my nerves are firing like sparks of electricity forking in every direction underneath my skin.
As I return to earth, Fee is still pounding into me relentlessly; it’s almost too much. I’m over sensitive from coming, but I can tell Fee’s close, so I help tip him over the edge.
“I can’t wait for you to fill me with your cum. I want to feel you dripping out of me all night,” I say as I clench around him. His movements stutter, and then his cock is pulsating, his cum shooting deep inside me.
“Holy shit. Fuck,” and some other garbled nonsense comes out of Fee’s mouth as his orgasm slams into him.
He leans forward and kisses the back of my neck and shoulders, his tongue licking at the beads of sweat there. I feel sex drunk and groan as I lean forward, Fee’s cock slipping out of me. He rubs his thumb over my rim, gently massaging it.
“I really love seeing my cum dripping out of you.” I can sense his eyes on me. I bear down slightly so some more of it leaks out. I let out a gasp when he uses his fingers to push it back inside me again.
“Am I too old to have a new kink?” he asks.
I gasp, “I don’t think so. What’s your new kink?”
“This. I think I could keep playing with my cum in your hole all night.” My cock perks up again at his words, and I turn to face him.
“Apparently, I’m also into that.” We both laugh as he sees me getting hard again.
Eventually, Fee gets up and grabs a flannel from the bathroom. Something I’ve always loved about when we have sex is how he takes care of me afterwards. He wipes up my abs and chest before gently pressing the warm cloth to my rim. I make a contented 'mmm' sound at the feel of the warm water on my sensitive hole. Once he’s cleaned me up, he chucks the flannel into the laundry basket and then climbs back into bed. Fee switches off the lamp on the bedside table, and I snuggle into his side, my head on his chest. I love listening to his heart beating rhythmically, reminding me this is all real.
“I’m sorry it took so long for me to be ready to do this again,” he whispers before pressing a soft kiss to my head.
“Let’s not be sorry anymore. Let’s just love each other.”