Chapter 39 #3
I let out a savage yell and brought up all seven of my channels that were screaming for release. I flung my head back, pointing my chest to the sky as they detonated out of me. No longer were there seven individual channels, but combined as one, into pure bright-white light.
I was being split apart. The power was burning me from the inside out, searing my soul.
Solais, take me into your embrace. Guard me and keep me.
Through the pain, I saw a golden haze in the distance, beckoning me onward. With one final burst of light, I tied my soul, my life force, to the power.
A mushroom cloud ricocheted around me, sweeping harmlessly over my people. But the hufen were burned away, bursting into ash.
Twin bursts of light appeared where Thom and Mira had disappeared, stretching up, forming a dome over our location. It flew high and wide, expanding around us, a protective barrier that the forces I had thrust away could not penetrate.
This was Starfire. It had to be. I’d never seen anything like this before. Never would again.
I lifted my head through the pain, the blinding light still bursting forth from me. It would continue until my life force was extinguished. I saw only my people.
We had done it. I could rest now.
I spared a moment’s thought of pity for the next generation, for the mess we were leaving them with. For the fact that we hadn’t been able to solve it this time and must leave it in their hopefully capable hands.
The golden haze approached, and I gave myself to it.
I shot awake.
What the fuck just happened?
That was Violet. And I had experienced her last moments. They were so real. But… that had happened after the memories transferred. And yet again, that word—Starfire.
But what was it?
Griff wasn’t back that night, nor the next.
I found myself checking constantly on that golden light within me, pressing my hand to my chest as if I could feel his presence there.
It kept burning bright and steady, and every time I reached down through our bond, I felt an answering warmth.
At sporadic times throughout the day, especially the evenings when I missed him most, I’d feel a push through that golden space, his silent reassurance across the distance.
We weren’t able to speak mind to mind from such distances, although Andrei had informed us that ability could come in time, but we at least had this fragile connection. I clung to it, missing him desperately, more than I cared to admit.
Several times a day, I climbed the tallest tower in the castle to look out to the west, as if I could see what he was facing.
I would study the horizon, going cross-eyed as I attempted to determine if it was darkening.
No visible signs appeared in the sky—the sun still shone brightly.
But I could see the waves of refugees pouring into Valdris, driven inward from the outskirts of the realm, seeking sanctuary in the capital.
We took them in, found them homes as best we could.
I just wished we could promise them the safety they sought.
The clearing outside of the castle had been turned into a makeshift camp, just as it had been fifty years ago. Soldiers were being recalled, forces positioned strategically.
They may not have been told, but they knew.
They were preparing for war. Many of them had fought last time.
You could see it on their grizzled faces, the set of their shoulders, the resignation that this was happening.
But every time they looked at me, there was hope.
Hope that I could solve this before it came to war.
I threw myself into poring through the prophecy, both what had existed and the new pieces I’d picked up from Violet’s memories.
I had read Finn’s notes so many times they were creased from handling.
On the off chance that a change of scenery would help jog something, I had moved to Kaia’s office, and Freya had decided to join me.
I ran a hand through my hair and sighed heavily. In the library, in Kaia’s office, in the middle of a field—no matter where I was, none of this made any sense.
“When are you and that boy going public?” Kaia’s voice cut through my thoughts.
Freya and I froze as Kaia snorted. “I have eyes, girls. Don’t think I haven’t seen how you and that boy are around each other. Although you have been fairly discrete. Surprisingly so, given it’s a mating bond.”
My mouth fell open. “You know about the bond?”
“Course I do.” She shrugged. “I’ve known that boy, both of them, since they were toddling around here following their father around.
Griff has never been like this with any other woman.
Had to be a mating bond to make him act this way.
The question is why he’s keeping it silent.
I always figured him as being the possessive type. ”
“He is,” I muttered as Freya dissolved into laughter.
Kaia looked at me assessingly. “I’m guessing it has something to do with Finn. And neither of you have a clue how to handle that.”
“I’m all ears if you have any advice.”
She scratched a spot on her neck. “Can’t say that I do, but I wouldn’t wait too long. These things have a way of getting out, and I imagine the hurt he’ll feel now is nothing compared to how he’ll feel if he’s the last to know.”
With that bit of unhelpful advice, she left to go torture her soldiers.
I checked in with the bond for the hundredth time that day, the answering warmth flaring immediately.
“You know, I was in love with Griff once,” Freya mused.
That got my attention and I looked up sharply.
She burst out laughing. “You should see your face. Lexie, I was eight.” She continued laughing.
“I haven’t seen Griff this relaxed since around that time.
You do bring out the best in him. He’s laughing and winking, for Voda’s sake.
Anyway, Griff and Finn had just gotten back from another trip here, their third in as many months—”
“Here?” I interrupted. “From Valdris?” They’d made mention of being here in childhood, but from how Freya was talking, they had been here more than I realized.
“Yeah, Garrett was the previous Champion. I thought you knew.” She continued talking, not realizing the shock her words delivered. I came to the crushing realization that even though I was mated to the man, I actually knew very little of his history.
“Everly was, of course, from Maraleth, so they alternated through the year between both places. You know, Garrett was the one who informed Finn and Griff about the prophecy. Griff became obsessed with it, with you, the lost princess. Before Garrett disappeared—”
“He disappeared?” I interrupted again.
She tilted her head to one side. “Griff never mentioned this?”
“He said his father was gone. I assumed dead.” There was an important distinction there. One my mate had failed to clarify.
She shook her head. “I don’t really know what happened and the twins have always refused to talk about it.
I get the sense that they all prefer to assume he’s dead.
All I know is that he told them he had to take a trip, but the day or so before he was going to leave, he disappeared.
For a little while, they thought maybe he had gotten the days wrong and left early.
But that wasn’t like him, and it certainly wasn’t like him to not say goodbye.
He lived for his family. But before all that happened, maybe Garrett had some sort of foresight or something because he charged Griff with protecting the princess, should she come back during his lifetime. ”
There was a sting in my chest. Griff had been charged by his father to protect me? Doubt crept in even as the golden warmth flared, as if Griff somehow knew, even across the distance, that I needed his reassurance right now.
Freya’s words from what felt like days earlier came back to me. She was right—Griff hadn’t told me he loved me. But to be fair, I hadn’t said it either.
Everything between us was so new. Had it truly just been a week ago that I had stood in a beautiful ball gown and Griff had finally admitted there was something between us? What we felt went deeper than a mating bond and a promise to a father, didn’t it?
One thing was for certain—my mate needed to get his ass back here. And soon. Before these questions ate me alive.