Chapter 41
Chapter
Forty-One
The dreams are getting stronger. That can mean only one thing. He approaches.
— From the journal of Violet Andrever
Iwas in the field of tulips before the waterfall that hid the cottage.
The colors were so vivid they were unreal, the blue of the waterfall misting in the distance.
My fingertips drifted over the silky petals as I wandered.
And there he was, standing before me, strangely missing his swords.
He didn’t go anywhere without them these days.
He turned as I ran to him, catching me in his arms with a laugh.
“I missed you,” I said as I brushed kisses over his face. He captured my lips with his.
“I’m here now,” he breathed against my mouth.
I had no idea how long we stood there embracing, but the soft morning light began to bleed away. I thought the sun had gone behind a cloud, but the darkness kept coming, swallowing the sky, devouring every trace of light until the world plunged into unnatural night.
The joy that had blazed through my veins at finding Griff here shuttered and was replaced with ice water as I watched the tulips curl inward as if in agony, the vibrant reds and yellows draining to a sickly gray, then black.
The waterfall stopped moving as it turned to ash and crumbled away grain by grain, the wind carrying the dust of my paradise into nothingness.
“No!” I screamed, as tendrils of shadows erupted from the dying earth, wrapping around Griff’s ankles, wrists, and throat as shackles, tearing him from my arms. I lunged for him, but an invisible band stretched across my chest, sending me sprawling to the earth.
“Lexa—” His voice was cut short as the darkness shredded him bit by bit, strips of his skin unraveling into shadow.
The last bit that existed was his hand, stretched out to mine, and his eyes, fraught with the terror that he was truly dying, leaving me alone, before he dissolved.
Just ash on the wind, swirling in the fetid air.
The golden place inside me where our bond lived withered and shrank until it was an empty husk as the warmth drained out of me, replaced by an oozing cold that burrowed into my bones.
Shadows poured into the empty space, filling me with whispers, hunger, endless hate.
They devoured me from the inside out, destroying every piece that made me me.
“No!” The cry was torn from my throat. I sank to my knees, onto the wet ground, as if the earth itself was bleeding, dying a slow and painful death, drained of magic and goodness and light.
“Submit,” came that cruel voice from behind me, above me, inside me.
I reached desperately for my channels, for some shred of hope to cling to, only to find the rushing river of power had been drained to the barest trickle by the violation of the darkness. My channels lay silent and cold, the life choked out of them by shadows.
Haunting laughter surrounded me so completely I lost track of which way was up as the shadows claimed me and dragged me down into the infinite, suffocating darkness.
I sat bolt upright in bed, screaming his name. Terrified, I dove deep into myself—and there it was. The peaceful golden light. I grabbed it with desperate hands and tugged, following it to him.
“Lexa?” His voice was muffled with sleep.
“You’re alive,” I sobbed. I didn’t even stop to think that with the distance this was the first time we’d been able to speak like this.
Instantly, I felt the sleep clear from his mind. “What happened?”
“Don’t leave me. Please don’t leave me. I can’t lose you.” I repeated it over and over again, hiccupping through the sobs. I could feel him through our bond, but the nightmare had been so vivid it had me doubting what was the dream and what was reality.
“You will never lose me. I’m yours, Lexa.” His mind caressed mine. “I’ll be home soon. I promise.”
I didn’t sleep again that night. I just lay there in our bed, shaking with the effort to clear my mind.
Before the sun had fully risen, I’d climbed the tower, staring off into the west. I could feel the bond tugging me toward him.
Knew that the position of my chest was pointed directly at him like a compass needle pointing north, and if I gave in to the urge and folded myself into the ether, I’d arrive precisely in his arms.
Fighting that urge with every fiber of my being, I gazed over the landscape, looking down at the town below me.
Something was off, although I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.
The streets of Valdris were packed, even at this early hour.
Too many people, soldiers and refugees alike, had come to the city at once, with barely anywhere to put them.
People were bunking down in every shop, every square foot covered.
The castle was packed, rooms that had been closed for centuries opened for the survivors.
My heart bled for my displaced people and the shopkeepers and townspeople who had opened their doors to them.
Many of them remembered, had lived through the last war, and knew that in times like these, a little kindness went a long way.
And I was heartened, that my people could rise to the occasion like this.
That a fortress as defensible as this would let in the stragglers.
And then I realized what was off—even with all these people, even with the streets teeming with life, the sounds were wrong.
There was no birdsong. Conversations were muffled.
Children’s play was halted, as if laughter could summon the darkness.
And as the sun began to rise, I saw it—a shadow on the horizon. Distant, but approaching.
I fled to the training yard, desperate to outrun the images of reality and nightmare burned into my mind.
I started running laps, my feet pounding against the earth as if with each thud I could stamp out the terror.
When my lungs burned and my legs shook, I moved to the training dummy, attacking it with viciousness.
My dagger throwing became an obsession. I moved back, increasing the distance farther and farther, each blade finding its mark with deadly precision.
When Kaia arrived, she glanced at my sweat-soaked, wild-eyed state and wordlessly passed me a sword.
Hours blurred together as she worked me mercilessly.
I barely noticed the sun’s arc across the sky, the other fighters who came and went.
Every time my mind tried to drift back to the shadows and haunting laughter, her blade found an opening, demanding my complete attention.
I threw myself into the fight, the burn in my muscles a sharp focus on the present.
I didn’t know what else to do but exhaust my body in the hopes that my brain would follow. Time was running out and I was nowhere near ready. But where to turn, what path to take—I was as hopelessly lost as ever.
As the sun started to set, he found me.
A tingling swept through our bond as I spun around to see him standing there, bruised, sweaty, exhausted, several days of growth on his jaw, but whole.
The sword fell from my fingers as relief crashed through me with such force I started to crumble to my knees.
He caught me before I could hit the ground.
Scooping me up in his arms, he gave everyone around us a pointed look.
They all hurriedly went back to their tasks—soldiers, my soldiers, who I knew would take the sight of the princess in her Champion’s arms to the grave if I asked it of them. Kaia jerked her head toward her office.
I said not a word as he carried me into Kaia’s office, my ears attuned to his heart pounding in his chest. Thump, thump, thump. I just listened, letting the metronome convince me he was here. He was alive. It was just a dream.
He sank into a chair, still holding me tight against him.
I pulled away to search his features, noting the deep shadows under his eyes and how pale he was, as his hands came up to cradle my face.
His kiss was deep and hungry, full of the same relief I felt.
When he drew back, his eyes scanned over me while I ran my hands over his chest and shoulders, checking for injuries by touch and body channel.
I caught a slight wince when I touched his ribs gently.
“I am unharmed, Princess,” he said, catching my restless hands and holding them in one of his large ones.
I tucked my head under his chin, and we sat there, his steady breathing the only thing keeping me grounded.
Finally, gently, he brushed my hair back from where it was plastered against my neck, soaked with sweat. As he uncovered skin, he pressed a kiss there, his stubble gently tickling me.
“Do you want to tell me about it?”
I shook my head, and he kissed my temple, hitching me closer to him.
We sat in silence as I listened to our hearts beat in time, until I finally voiced the reason for the terror that had destroyed me all day.
“In every one of the dreams, he separates us. In worse and worse ways. There’s no hope.
No rescue. Just you and me parted, the world destroyed.
Unless I give in. Unless I submit to him. ”
His arms tightened around me, almost to the point of pain. “If you were taken from me,” he said, his voice dark and menacing, “I would burn the world to find you. Shred every corner. Nothing would stop me until you were back in my arms. We are bound, you and I, and nothing will keep me from you.”
A jolt of power ran through both of us, just as it had when we first touched. Sharp as lightning, sealing his words as though they were a vow.
But even as the power settled between us, the turmoil still churned beneath my relief of being here with him.
“I know there’s more,” Griff said, his voice gentle but perceptive. The bond that promised to keep us together also made it impossible to hide from each other. “Something else is troubling you.”