Chapter 16 #3
Cypher knelt beside me, his face pale. "You stopped breathing. Your heart..."
"Did you hear me?" I grabbed his coat with weak fingers. "I found it. I know how to reach the Engine."
Understanding dawned in his eyes, followed quickly by hope. "You're certain?"
I nodded, wincing as the movement sent pain lancing through my skull."
Vic appeared with his medical kit, already pulling out instruments to check my vitals. "Her pulse is erratic," he reported, fingers pressed to my wrist. "Temperature dropping."
"Get back to the ship," Cypher ordered, sliding his arms beneath me before I could protest.
He lifted me easily, cradling me against his chest as he strode toward The Night-Piercer. The crew followed behind us.
The room spun as I sat up, and I had to grip the edge of the narrow cot to steady myself. It took me a moment to realize I was in the ship's infirmary, the small, sterile room where Vic treated injuries and illnesses.
Fragments of memory floated back through the fog in my brain. The First Dark. The crushing pressure. The Genesis Engine, suspended in nothingness.
My throat felt raw when I swallowed, and my chest ached with each breath as if my lungs were bruised. But I was alive, and more importantly, I remembered exactly where the Engine was hidden.
I swung my legs over the side of the cot, testing my strength. Weak, but functional. The floor was cold against my bare feet as I stood, steadying myself against the wall when the room tilted dangerously.
I pulled on my boots and jacket, which someone had neatly placed on a nearby chair. My fingers trembled slightly as I fastened the clasps. The First Anchor still hung around my neck, though it felt different somehow. Heavier, as if it had absorbed something during my communion with the First Dark.
The ship was quiet as I made my way down the narrow corridor. Dawn light filtered through the small viewports, casting pale rectangles on the wooden floor. Most of the crew would still be sleeping, exhausted from yesterday's ordeal and the celebration the night before.
My stomach growled, reminding me that I hadn't eaten since before my attempt to contact the First Dark. Tea and food first, then I'd find Cypher and tell him exactly what I'd seen.
I turned toward the galley, but paused when I heard voices coming from Cypher's cabin. The door was slightly ajar, a sliver of golden lamplight spilling into the corridor.
"—can't keep doing this, Cypher." Jask's voice, tense and low. "The lies are piling up too high."
"Keep your voice down," Cypher hissed.
I knew I should announce my presence or leave. Eavesdropping was a betrayal of the trust I'd built with the crew. But something in Jask's tone made me hesitate, made me step closer to the narrow opening instead.
"She nearly died yesterday," Jask continued, his voice dropping even lower. "And for what? A plan you set in motion months ago without telling any of us the full truth?"
"It was necessary," Cypher gritted through clenched teeth. "Everything I've done has been necessary."
"Was it necessary to arrange her father's arrest? To make sure she'd be desperate enough to take any job that came along?" pressed my hand against the wall to steady myself, and the other over my mouth to keep a scream at bay.
"I didn't know Gideon would offer her the job. I just... pointed him in the right direction. He already had her on his list. She's a skilled scavenger, and he'd taken notice long before I nudged him."
"You knew she was a rift before she did," Jask accused. "How? How did you even find her in the first place?" There was a long pause, and all I wanted to do was scream and cry and hit something hard.
"I can't tell you that. I'm sorry. Right now isn't the time."
Jask laughed humorlessly. "You're a bastard, you know that, right?"
"I needed leverage," Cypher insisted. "I needed her willing to take risks, to push beyond what she thought possible. Her father's imprisonment accomplished that."
"And now you've got what you wanted," Jask said bitterly. "But at what cost, Cypher? She trusts us. Trusts you. And Kora—" His words broke slightly. "I can't keep lying to Kora about this. She deserves to know what we've done."
"You will say nothing," Cypher's voice turned dangerous. "Not until we have the Engine and can complete our mission. After that, if you still want to clear your conscience—"
"It's not about clearing my fucking conscience!" Jask's voice rose. "It's about doing what's right for once! We've manipulated her from the beginning, used her family, put her in danger—"
"For the greater good," Cypher cut in. "For the survival of the Nytherian people. One family's hardship against the salvation of thousands? The math is simple."
"Not to me," Jask said quietly. "And not to Kora, when she finds out."
I must have made a sound—a gasp.
My foot caught on the wooden floor, sending me stumbling against the door. It swung open with a loud creak, revealing me to the men inside. My heart stuttered as Cypher's eyes met mine, widening with horror as he realized what I'd heard.
"Juno—" he started, rising from his chair.
I couldn't breathe. I couldn't think. Everything I'd believed about him, about us, about this entire journey—it was all a lie. He'd arranged my father's imprisonment. He'd manipulated me from the beginning. Used me. Used my family.
I turned and ran, my vision blurring. Behind me, I heard the scrape of chairs, Cypher's voice calling my name, but I didn't stop. I couldn't face him. Not now. Maybe not ever.
I burst into my quarters, slamming the door behind me. My hands shook as I yanked open drawers, grabbing my few possessions and shoving them into my pack. I had to get out of here. I had to go home. I had to help my parents.
Vic. I needed to find Vic. He could send a message to the Prime Realm, arrange transport. Anything to get me away from Cypher and his lies.
The door opened behind me. I didn't turn, knowing exactly who it was.
"Get out," I hissed, shoving clothes into my pack with trembling hands.
“Scavenger, please—"
"Get OUT!" I screamed, whirling to face him.
Cypher stood in the doorway, his face pale. He stepped inside and closed the door behind him, turning the lock with a decisive click.
Something in me snapped. I lunged at him, my fists connecting with his chest. "You fucking bastard!" I screamed, pounding against him. "You liar! You manipulated everything! My father's arrest? Was my mother's illness your doing too?"
He didn't defend himself, didn't try to stop my attack. Just stood there, taking every blow, every word I hurled at him.
"Demon!" I spat, tears streaming down my face.
"Was any of it fucking real?" My strength was fading, my blows growing weaker as sobs wracked my body.
I stepped back, chest heaving, and pointed a shaking finger at him.
"Tell me exactly how you knew I was a rift.
How did you find me? What else haven't you told me? "
I hated that even furious, he was beautiful. Hated that my body remembered the heat of his hands before my mind remembered the lies.
Cypher's expression was shuttered completely, his eyes shadowed with something that might have been regret—if I believed he was capable of it. "Sit down," he snapped. "I'll tell you everything, but you need to fucking listen.”
"I'll stand," I spat, crossing my arms to hide how badly my hands were shaking.
For a long moment, he was silent, as if gathering his thoughts, or perhaps constructing more lies. "It was me," he finally said. "I was the one who pulled you from the Gallery all those years ago."
I stared at him, uncomprehending. "What are you talking about?"
"When you fell into the Gallery by accident and drifted for three days. My magic—my Nytherian soul magic, what little I have left, felt you calling out for help. I followed it and brought you back to the Prime Realm."
The room tilted beneath my feet. I remembered that day, remembered the terror of falling, the endless darkness, then waking up on solid ground with no memory of how I'd gotten there. "That's impossible," I hissed.
"I knew from that moment you were special," he continued. "Your connection to the void was unlike anything I'd ever seen. I knew you were the answer to my problems—to my people's problems."
"So you've been watching me for years? Waiting for the right moment to use me?"
"I kept track of you," he admitted. "Made sure you were safe. When the time was right, when I had everything else in place—the codex, the crown, the coordinates for a suitable realm. I needed to make sure you'd be willing to help."
"So you had my father arrested." The words tasted like ash in my mouth.
"I didn't order his arrest," Cypher clarified, as if that made any difference. "I simply made sure certain Assembly officials received information about his under-the-table crystal sales. What they did with that information was their choice."
"And you knew I'd do anything to save him. You knew I'd take Gideon's job, that I'd end up on your ship, in your debt."
"Yes."
The simplicity of his admission was like a knife between my ribs. "Did the crew know?" I asked, dreading the answer. "Were they all part of your plan too?"
"No," Cypher said firmly. "Only Jask knew parts of it. The others were in the dark."
I laughed bitterly. "How considerate of you, limiting the number of people who betrayed me."
"I did what was necessary for my people," he said. "I won't apologize for that. You were a stranger."
"Your people," I echoed. "And what am I to you now, Cypher? I was almost beginning to believe I could be one of your people. But I guess that was never true, was it? I'm only a vessel to you."
Blatant pain flickered in his copper eyes. "You know that's not true."
"Do I?" I stepped closer, fury giving me courage. "Because from where I'm standing, everything between us has been a lie. Every moment, every conversation, every—" I faltered, unable to say the word 'kiss.' "All of it, orchestrated to keep me compliant, to make sure I'd do what you needed."