Chapter Seventeen
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
As soon as they were out of the bookshop, Malcolm took her hand. They both agreed that they were thrilled to see Mars at the Beach already looking like a success. Josie told him that she’d asked Mari to keep a few copies for the reading retreat guests.
Suddenly, he blurted, “I’m going to miss you when you’re gone.”
She squeezed his hand. “I’m going to miss you too.”
It was as close as either of them had come to talking about having feelings for each other.
Malcolm was more tempted than he had ever been to add that he didn’t want her to leave. Or that even if she did, what if they tried having a real relationship and continuing it long distance? But the same part of him that had always held back kept the words inside.
Though he couldn’t get the words out, he needed her to know how much she meant to him. That he would more than miss her. That he would long for her.
They didn’t say anything else as they walked beneath the moon down the towpath to his boat. Once they were inside, just like nearly every time before, they fell into each other’s arms.
His mouth was on hers and hers on his. But this kiss was different. This kiss was about more than just hot sex or the thrill of finally getting to be with someone he’d fantasized about for so long. This kiss was about expressing something that he’d always kept way deep down inside. Emotions that he’d never let run free. In the light of day, he knew he might regret it, but tonight he couldn’t hold back.
He whispered her name between kisses. And every time he spoke those five sweet letters, she melted even more against him. He ran kisses over her face and then back to her lips, slowly undressing her, needing to strip her bare long before they made it to the bedroom. This dress was one of the easier outfits, as it just unzipped at the back and then slid off to pool around her feet. Yet again, she took his breath away, whether with clothes or without.
“So beautiful,” he said in a low voice, following up his words with the stroke of his hands over the bare skin of her arms before threading his fingers with hers and pulling her close to kiss her again. He tasted her mouth, the fullness of her lower lip, their tongues tangling, their breath coming faster now. He lifted her, still in her bra and tights and heeled boots, in his arms and carried her astern to the bed.
He was pleased he’d remembered to stock up on protection earlier in the day.
It seemed she wanted his clothes gone just as much as he did hers, because before he could divest her of the rest of her garments, she was sliding his jacket off his shoulders and unbuttoning his shirt, running her hands over his pecs as soon as the fabric was pulled away.
“Every time we make love,” she said softly, “part of me feels like I’m dreaming.”
“For me too,” he said. “Being with you feels like all my dreams are coming true. Even the dreams I never let myself have.” He stared into her eyes. “Especially those.” It was the most he’d ever admitted to anyone about how tightly he kept his heart locked up.
And then her hands were in his hair, and she was pulling his mouth down to hers, kissing him so sweetly, and yet so simply, that he forgot everything but her. But how much he wanted her. Everything but how much he needed her. How grateful he was to have these precious days and nights with her. She’d made him look at everything differently. As though he was seeing life through a new lens.
Soon, they were both naked, and he was leaning over her on the bed. “You… Us.” He didn’t have the words for it, but he needed her to know anyway. “This is special.”
She looked into his eyes, her legs and arms wrapped around him, their hearts beating against each other. “So special,” she agreed.
He slipped on a condom in record time, and then he was moving into her, and her eyes were closing, her neck and back arching as she gasped in pleasure. He wanted to remember her forever like this, in his arms, lost in pleasure, her warmth wrapped all around him. He couldn’t look away, couldn’t seem to get close enough or hold her tightly enough.
He found her mouth with a kiss so full of the emotion he was barely holding inside that it was almost rough. But she didn’t seem to mind, kissing him back just as passionately, moving with him just as urgently, not only taking everything he had to give, but giving it back tenfold.
They were both desperate for each other as they flew together to the peak and then tumbled over in each other’s arms. And throughout, they never stopped kissing, even long after release.
Holding her in his arms, he could kiss her forever.
* * *
Josie had never known it was possible to feel so good. Not only while making love with Malcolm, but afterward too, when she was in his arms and they were softly kissing as though neither wanted their time together to end. He was so tender and deliciously passionate too. She was spoiled now for all future lovers.
Even the thought made her chest clench. She couldn’t imagine being with anyone else. No, no one would ever make her feel so good, so beautiful, or as happy as Malcolm Sullivan did. It was a good thing that she had already written off men, because after him, a relationship with anyone else would seem so boring.
There was a part of her, growing bigger by the second, that longed to ask, what if they changed the rules? What if they moved the boundaries? What if there weren’t any anymore? What if they actually did this for real?
She wrapped her arms tightly around him. No, that wasn’t in the cards. He’d been clear. And yet, it was harder and harder not to wish for things to be just that little bit different.
At last, the grumbling of their stomachs drew them apart.
“I swear, if we both weren’t so hungry all the time, I’d never let you out of this bed.”
She smiled up at him, knowing that to have had this time with him was such a blessing. She wouldn’t waste it lamenting what could never be. “What do you say we whip up something together tonight?”
“I’d say that’s exactly what we just did,” he said with an eyebrow raised.
She laughed. “Something to eat, I mean.”
The other eyebrow went up. “That can be arranged,” he teased.
She lifted his hand from where he was starting to stroke her curves and kissed his fingers. “Yes, but later. After we’ve had some sustenance for round two.”
His eyes gleamed. “I hope you’re planning on many more rounds than that before the night is through.”
A shiver of anticipation ran through her. “Of course I am,” she confirmed.
And then she slid out of the bed, held out a hand, and together they walked into the kitchen to make a feast that would see them through so that their stomachs wouldn’t interrupt their lovemaking again.