Chapter 13
Nix
This was getting ridiculous.
I sighed, turning in my bed again. Just like last night.
It wasn’t as if the bed was uncomfortable—quite the opposite. It was heaven on earth, the thick duvet like a warm cloud surrounding me, and the mattress just the right amount of firm and bouncy without being uncomfortable.
My body was melting into it, exhaustion weighing down my limbs.
Yet my mind didn’t seem to get the notice.
There were five wolves sleeping on this floor.
The two pups—as Gray had called them—were across the hall from me.
Gray had told me they each had their own room, but I’d heard one of them sneaking across the hallway and into the other one’s room about an hour and a half ago.
Now they were silent, their auras blissfully relaxed, sleep having pulled them under.
How would it feel to have someone whose company made you feel so at ease that you could just fall asleep like that?
Go downstairs, that voice inside me urged, the same voice that’d made me follow Gray’s presence a couple of hours ago. I’d find him, no problem. Hell, I was painfully aware of where he was. I could feel it in my bones. Could feel the bond tugging at me, urging me to get closer to him.
I sighed, then turned again, fluffed the pillow under my head, and closed my eyes.
At the other end of the hall, there were three bedrooms occupied by other shifters. I didn’t know if they lived here—apparently, there were quite a few who lived on the second floor—or if they just spent the night because it’d gotten late, but they were here, sleeping, their auras calm and floaty.
I opened my eyes again. It was a dark night, the moon just a small, silver crescent in the otherwise pitch-black night sky, the forest a looming, dark presence just across the snow-covered lawn.
I had a meeting with Rhett tomorrow. He had questions about the barrier, and probably about his mate too.
He hadn’t said as much when he’d asked me to meet him in the morning for a trip to the barrier, but I’d seen it written across his face.
And I got it. This pack didn’t appear to know anything about mages at all.
They had a general concept that magic users existed, but to them, we were all the same.
That’d become more and more obvious from their questions throughout the day.
It was confusing, really.
I groaned, thinking about that one teenage girl who’d been all excited when she told me about their community garden and all the herbs they’d planted and dried for winter. Followed by disappointment when I’d had to admit I didn’t need herbs for spells.
It’d been so… so weird. My brain still had trouble realizing they’d actually been nice and meant it. Like, she’d offered me supplies of what she thought I needed, just like that. She hadn’t even asked if I could show her a trick or whatever.
Maybe Gray had told them not to?
Was that something he’d do?
I thought back to the meeting he’d just casually pulled me into when he’d realized I’d been standing in front of the door.
How he’d reassured me time and time again that I didn’t need to use my magic if I didn’t want to.
How they wouldn’t force me. Even though the whole point of the meeting was to figure out how they could get rid of the enemies I’d brought to their doorstep.
It sounded too good to be true.
Like a trap.
Like they were trying to give me a false sense of security until I let my guard down. And then, one day, I’d wake up with a collar around my neck.
No, that voice inside my head insisted. Gray wouldn’t do that.
Gray.
My mate.
I followed the bond between us, the insistent pull that was getting harder to ignore by the minute. Pulsing, trying to get my attention.
He was so close.
A bit to my left, and down two flights of stairs.
I could reach him within a minute. If I wanted to, that was. Which I didn’t. I was perfectly capable of being alone. Hell, I’d been alone for six months. It was ridiculous to think I wasn’t able to be apart from a stranger for more than a few hours.
Apparently, I wasn’t able to be apart from a stranger—a potentially dangerous one at that—for more than a few hours.
The tugging sensation was worse than ever, my mind spinning, playing tricks on me. Every little creak was someone sneaking up on me, trying to attack.
My eyes hurt. My limbs were heavy, every fibre of my body demanding I sleep, but my brain was running wild.
And now?
Now I was sneaking along the hallway, following the invisible bond connecting me and that damn Alpha.
I looked to the left and to the right, waiting for someone to suddenly appear and tell me I wasn’t allowed to leave my room at night.
Hell, I’d expected there to be a guard just like last night, but the chair had been taken away after my talk with Gray yesterday morning, and that was that. Apparently, I wasn’t a flight risk anymore.
Yeah, right. How would you flee if you can’t even stand being away from him for a couple of hours?
the voice in my head taunted just as I reached the stairs.
My hand found the railing, the wood smooth beneath my fingers.
I revelled in the feeling, inhaling the faint scent of pine that permeated the whole packhouse.
I am being mean to myself, I thought, shaking my head. It wasn’t my fault I was so drawn to Gray; it was fate. Biology. Magic. Whatever.
And if he were a bad guy, I wouldn’t give in. But I didn’t think he was. Or maybe it was more that I didn’t want to think he was. I wanted to believe he was good. Because it was becoming painfully obvious that I’d underestimated the power of a mate bond. And this wasn’t even the real thing.
Pale lights illuminated the dining hall, but it lay empty, no aura to be felt anywhere close.
I breathed a sigh of relief and carefully tiptoed past the kitchen, following the tugging rooted deep inside my chest. Just past the room they’d held the meeting in, the one with the map of the territory in the middle, and then on the right…
my magic flared, the pull so strong I stumbled, hitting the door with a dull thud.
So much for knocking politely, I thought, when the wooden door suddenly disappeared. I acted quickly, without really thinking about it, condensing the air to stop my fall.
“What the… Nix, are you okay?”
Gray rushed to my side, his eyes full of concern as he took in the way I was leaning against literally nothing.
“Oh, uh… yes,” I said, feeling heat creep into my cheeks as I carefully righted myself before letting go of my grasp on the air.
“You sure?” He reached out, hands hovering over my shoulders, not quite touching me, but enough for me to feel his warmth.
I wanted him to touch me, though, wanted him to cross the distance. Wanted to feel the little zing I always felt when we touched. Wanted to feel the calm I’d felt when he’d held my hand earlier. To experience the way my mind quieted down and my worries faded into the background.
“What are you doing here? You need to sleep.”
I opened my mouth, but there were no words. I couldn’t very well tell him that I didn’t feel safe here, right? It was his pack, and it was obvious he was immensely proud of it.
He studied me, dark eyes way too keen and knowing for my liking.
“Come in,” he said, stepping to the side so I could walk past him.
Did I want to?
Yes, that voice in my head said. That’s why you’re here, isn’t it?
I took a deep breath, inhaling the woodsy scent of my mate, then entered completely, managing not to flinch when the door shut behind me. There was no one on this floor aside from us.
“Soo…” Gray said, spreading his arms. “This is my office.”
It was nice. Warm. There was a wood-burning stove tucked into a corner, but that wasn’t what caught my attention. No, it was the big cedarwood desk commanding the whole room, an antique piece of furniture that spoke of history and tradition.
I stepped up to it and placed my hand on it, feeling for its age, its stories.
“It belonged to my great-grandfather,” Gray said, a wistful note in his voice. “He built it himself, at least that’s what my grandfather said. Took it with him when the pack had to move.”
I nodded, listening to Gray’s deep, scratchy voice. It was calming in a way I hadn’t expected it to be. It wasn’t melodic like Levi’s voice, but listening to Gray speak made my heart and mind slow down.
“My grandfather added the bookshelves,” Gray continued, nodding at the items in question.
“And my father the shelves on the wall. I’m afraid he’s not much of a craftsman, but he wanted to contribute to this office.
” He smiled, the skin around his eyes crinkling ever so slightly.
“To be honest, I think if I keep up the tradition of adding furniture to the Alpha’s office, the next one won’t have a place to sit. ”
I let out a surprised laugh.
“Maybe you can decorate the war room?”
“The war… You mean our conference room?” Gray laughed. “We don’t have a dedicated war room, Nix. This pack has never been at war.”
“Never?”
Gray laughed. “Who would we fight?”
“Other packs? For land and resources?” I suggested, furrowing my brow. Pack wars were common where I was from.
Gray shrugged, but his face wasn’t mocking; his tone was gentle.
“I realize your experiences vastly differ from ours. There are not many packs up here. The closest one is a two-hour drive away. I don’t need to fight anyone for land.
If I wanted to, we could expand; there’s plenty of unclaimed land available.
But we don’t need to. We have plenty of space to run.
I know it’s different for packs down south. ”
“And what about fights for dominance? Challenges to overthrow the Alpha?”
Granted, you didn’t need a war room for that. Challenges were fought one-on-one. The winner got the pack and the loser… Well, most of them didn’t live to be exiled.