Chapter Thirty-Six
‘W-What?’ I stuttered.
It was as if one of Polly’s cold pints of lager had been flung in my face. I collapsed backwards in my chair, desperately trying to compose myself.
‘That’s w-wonderful,’ I said, thinking it was anything but.
Bloody hell. I mean bloody hell . What had that bit of look-into-my-eyes been all about then? How had I read it so wrong?
Because you’re out of practice, said Cindy.
Too flipping right, I huffed.
And I’d just like to point something out. You seem to have changed your tune over Milo Soren.
I tried to compose my features into a blasé couldn’t-care-less arrangement. I had a nasty feeling I looked more like someone who’d been slapped around the face with a wet flip-flop. To say I was stunned was an understatement. Milo was speaking again.
‘Wonderful?’ he questioned. He gave a snort of derision. ‘I’m not sure I’d describe my foray back into the world of dating quite like that. To be perfectly honest, I was so shattered by Martha’s betrayal, I felt a need to prove myself. In other words, I’ve behaved like a total tart. I downloaded one of those dating apps and nearly got repetitive strain injury from swiping right. I said yes to any woman who was interested. I didn’t care what they looked like. Young or old.’
I had a sudden mental picture of Milo in bed with a pensioner. There she was. Blue bubble-perm pressed against his pillowcases.
‘Not that old,’ he added, as if reading my thoughts. ‘And not that young either,’ he added hastily. ‘Somewhere between thirty-five and fifty,’ he clarified.
‘Good to know,’ I gasped, plucking a drinks coaster from the side table. I vigorously fanned myself. I was hot, bothered, and out of sorts.
‘As long as they gave me the thumbs up on the app, then I was thrilled to bits.’
‘Awesome,’ I muttered, abandoning the coaster.
‘You see, it meant that – despite my wife no longer wanting me – I was still desirable to other women. And that was all I needed to know. My ego had taken a battering. My confidence had sunk not just to the floor, but down to the depths of the foundations. Obviously, I stopped behaving like that after a few weeks. Ended the one-night stands.’
‘Jolly good,’ I croaked.
I wondered what dating app he was on. Whether I could download it.
‘You see’ – he shrugged – ‘there comes a point when one-night stands don’t do it for you.’
‘Well, quite,’ I said, as if I engaged in them every other day of the week.
I’d never had a one-night stand. It struck me how na?ve I was. Before Robin, I hadn’t even had many boyfriends. In fact, I could count on one hand how many men I’d slept with. What would Milo make of that? Well… he’d probably think I was a bit wet behind the ears, that’s what.
And why had I got to nearly half a century in age but never left behind me a trail of devastated lovers? I mentally dove back through the pages of memory. Had I ever dumped anyone? I had a nasty feeling it had always been the boy who’d let me go, even though it wasn’t cool to admit that. Far better to say it was a mutual decision .
Memories came flooding back. Bittersweet ones. Yes, I’d said those words a lot in my earlier years. Even to Mum, when she’d asked why that nice boy Timothy had stopped coming round.
‘Tim?’ I’d feigned surprise. ‘Oh, we decided we didn’t have anything in common. It was a mutual decision.’ The bloody two-timing little turd.
‘In fact, I recently dated a woman for a whole six weeks,’ said Milo. ‘My track record is improving,’ he laughed.
‘Good to know.’
It really wasn’t.
‘She didn’t take too kindly to the way I ended it,’ he said thoughtfully.
‘Oh?’
‘I was a coward. Did it by phone. Texted her. It turned a little nasty. She got up from the sofa and slapped me.’
‘I see.’
Milo gave me a strange look.
‘I’m joking, Tilly. Anyway, to recap. I’ve seen a few women but there’s currently no one on the scene.’
Until the next time he swipes right, sniffed Cindy.
Milo regarded me for a moment.
‘What’s up? You’ve gone very quiet.’
‘Nothing,’ I said breezily, pasting a smile on my face.
‘So, what about you?’ he asked softly. ‘Are you being truthful about not yet dipping a toe in the dating waters?’
I pulled a face. I could hardly say that men were beating a path to my door. Not after the earlier confession about my social life being more arid than the Sahara Desert.
‘No,’ I said shortly, desperate to change the subject.
I didn’t want to know about Milo’s harem of women. Or his numerous one-night stands. Or how he’d managed to have a relationship for a whole six whole weeks. I felt sorry for the women, to be honest. What must it be like to be wined and dined by a guy who was hotter than chilli sauce – but then spat out like gum that had lost its flavour?
I looked at my wristwatch. The time was getting on. Hopefully Lisa and Juan were now sated, and it was safe to return home. Home. That was something Lisa’s maisonette had never been.
‘Why the glum face?’ asked Milo.
‘Oh, you know. I need to head back. I’m just reminded of the fact that I have no proper roots right now. It’s very unsettling. Anyway, as I said earlier, I’ll be rectifying that soon. My current mission is to find a room to rent. A stop gap. Then I’ll push on looking for my own place.’
‘Hang on a minute.’ Milo put out a hand to stop me getting up. His touch nearly sent me through the pub’s ceiling. ‘I might be able to help you out.’
I gave him a puzzled look.
‘How?’
‘When I moved into Starlight Cottage, the only thing that needed attention was the shed in the garden.’
‘I remember it,’ I nodded.
‘I had it demolished and then replaced with one of those fancy home-office-cum-summerhouse buildings. It’s completely in keeping with the cottage’s overall look. I’ve even planted some climbing roses around the door.’
‘Sounds nice. So, do you work from home?’
‘Not at all. I have family in Italy. My parents are there. And one or two other relatives that I’m very fond of, and who like to combine seeing me with a bit of a jolly. In my last place, space was never a problem. However, Starlight Cottage only has two bedrooms. Currently, JJ is occupying one of them. So, when family visit, I need somewhere for them to stay. My cousins won’t mind sleeping on the sofas in the cottage, but I can’t expect Zio Luigi or Zia Vittoria to do likewise. Nor my parents. They’re all in their late seventies. Hence my idea to replace the shed with something small but functional. The new studio has a double pull-out bed, a kitchenette area, plus a shower and loo. Everything is fully connected. Electrics. Running water. There’s even a unit on the wall to provide air conditioning in the summer and heating in the winter. It’s very chic and cosy if I do say so myself.’
‘Sounds terrific,’ I said.
‘It is,’ he smiled. ‘So how about it?’
‘How about what?’
‘How about you use it until you’re sorted out? You can pay me a peppercorn and keep it aired. To be honest, you’d be doing me a favour.’
My mouth fell open.
‘I-I couldn’t possibly impose,’ I stuttered.
‘You wouldn’t be,’ he assured. ‘Tell you what. Why don’t you give your bestie and Loverboy a little bit longer. Come back with me to Starlight Cottage. I know it’s dark, but I’ve had lights put around the back garden, so you’ll be able to see the accommodation.’ He gave me a disarming grin and something inside me melted. ‘After all, you have nothing to lose,’ he added.
Only my heart, I thought silently.