Chapter 27
The blaring—a fanfare of some sort—increases in volume until the door to my little shop is thrown open and Yenny steps through the doorway, backlit just enough that I can only barely make out the glitter of his crown and chain of state.
His velvet cape billows artistically around him.
It’s trimmed in something; if he were anyone else I’d guess ermine, but this looks suspiciously like blue shearling.
“My darling Princess Tanadelle!” he shouts, once the trumpets conclude their strident serenade. “We have come at long last to break the dread curse which binds you thus!”
Oh no; he’s using the royal “we.” This is going to be a disaster.
I step out from behind the desk, trying to ignore Sasha’s sniggering.
I should have dressed better, but even the thought of so much as brushing my hair to play into this little charade had exhausted me.
I’m wearing one of the gowns I rescued from Mrs. Gooch’s collection; it’s simple, pretty, and old-fashioned.
And comfortable. A necessary, given this could go on for hours.
“The Princess Tanadelle, daughter of the house of de Courcy; child of the Widdenmar; representation of the royal families of the Shining Realm. My darling,” Yenny shouts, stepping forward and taking my hands in his.
“Yenal, scion of the kingdom of Corscan, is here to free you from your damnèd curse.” Somewhere to my left, I hear Sasha and the pirate snort at his enthusiastic mispronunciation of “damned.” Blithely ignoring them, Yenal sweeps his eyes across me.
“Long have we waited upon this day. Longer still have you waited, bemired in such surroundings. How your modesty becomes you so beautifully.” He definitely means my dress.
I should have worn something…else. Of course, I haven’t got anything else.
Certainly not something he’d find appropriate.
“Are you prepared to join our houses and rule as one?”
“Please don’t be disappointed if it doesn’t work,” I murmur.
“Hah!” he barks. He’s so confident he makes Driz look like a shrinking violet.
I glance around a little wildly. The bookshop is full to bursting with customers—no, onlookers; no one has bought anything, nor do they seem like they might—some portion of his retinue, and at least two trumpeters, dressed in their purple velvet livery, holding their long, shining fanfare trumpets tight against their bodies and trying very hard not to break the delicate ostrich plumes that decorate their floppy caps, which are brushing against the bookcases and the low ceiling.
The bookshop suddenly feels very small and very crowded. I swallow.
“Dearest Tanadelle,” Yenny says, dropping his voice and gazing at me affectionately. “Together we shall make such magic!”
He pulls me into his arms and kisses me, his lips soft against mine, for what feels like a very long time. When he pulls back, his expression is a little—just a little—tentative.
“I don’t think it worked,” I say, gently. “But I can walk to the door and try it.”
I hear the soft shuffle of people on either side of us trying to move out of the way. We squeeze past them, and I put my hand out and reach for the lovely clear day just outside the open door.
My hand meets the expected resistance.
I drop my arm and turn to him, shaking my head.
He sighs. “Well, hells. We tried.”
“That we did,” I agree.
“It would have been lovely, you know,” he continues. “Very convenient.”
“I do. I’m sorry,” I say. I don’t think Yenny has ever been faced with a problem he hasn’t surmounted in some way or another. Usually by being very enthusiastic about it.
The rest of the room deflates with an audible sigh.
“Oy,” Sasha yells from behind me. I cringe and turn around. I’ve already felt humiliated enough today; I can’t imagine what she’s got planned, but I’d really rather she didn’t.
“Half-price on any book in the store,” she shouts. “Today only! We’ve got three more stories to explore!”
“Sasha,” I begin, but she’s well beyond stopping now. I’d vastly prefer that everyone clear out and leave me alone. Perhaps Sasha could stay. And the pirate.
“Well, no help for it,” Yen says, behind me. “We’d better buy some books. Contribute to the local economy, show the locals how it’s all done, eh? We do dabble in retail ourselves, after all.” He looks over at me, pride glowing from his face.
“Yes, your lovely sheep,” I say.
“Our lovely sheep!” he crows. “Our Crombishire Blue wool! We sell it to local spinners, who then sell it to several older witches who knit the most charming jumpers from it.”
I’m suddenly struck with a marvelous idea.
Is it unethical of me to take advantage of Yenal’s good nature?
I decide to worry about it later. “It won’t have escaped your notice that it’s quite crowded in here.
It would mean so much to me if you could find it in your heart to help me out a little.
Given your experience, and all.” I pause, wondering how thickly I should be laying it on.
Yenal’s positively beaming at me, clearly hanging on to every word.
“I really have no experience to draw upon, you see—”
Someone behind me sniggers. Sasha, I think.
“How well we know!” Yenal says, stepping forward to take my hands in his. “You’ve lived such a modest, gentle life up until now. How agonizing this experience must be for you. Of course we will do everything in our power to assist.”
“You’ve proven such an extraordinary draw, Yenal. Since we may finally sell a few books today,” I say, “Sasha can man the till with me—”
Sasha clears her throat noisily.
“Erm, I mean, Sasha can…woman the till with me, and you can help folks carry things. Tie them up with twine if they buy more than can be easily carried in one hand.”
“You need bags,” Sasha says, thoughtfully. “It really is hard to carry loads of books in your arms, you know?”
“No one has yet bought more than two books at a time,” I point out.
“They might if you had bags available for them to carry books in,” Sasha says, smiling.
Her eyes are sparkling in a fashion that gives me a little pause; she’s got some idea cooking.
In any event, I’m not convinced that having bags for customers to take books away in will change my dismal sales much, but I’m happy to try anything.
Sasha moves behind the till with me. “Let’s chat later,” she murmurs, then turns to smile brightly at the room. “Half-price on all stock! We’ve got some of our very favorites up on three…and there’re lots of cozy nooks where you can curl up and dip into the books before you buy!”
“What a charming operation,” Yenny says, watching a few folks start up the stairs. “So rustic!”
“You should make the pirate do something,” Sasha says, tipping her chin toward Bash, who’s moved out of the way and is loitering on the little flight of stairs that lead down to my room.
“Oy, Barn Pirate,” she shouts, before I can say anything.
“You must have had a lot of time to read out on the open seas—any recommendations?”
Bash gives a long, loose shrug.
“Who is that?” Yenny says, staring at him with something close to appreciation.
“No one,” I sigh.
“I object,” the pirate says, grinning at me.
“He drops by and steals stuff,” I clarify. “Apparently because he’s bored.”
“He’s a pirate suffering under a dread curse,” Sasha adds.
“Fear of water,” Bash supplies. “Dreadfully inconvenient.”
“You don’t speak like a pirate,” Yenny says, whipping out a quizzing glass and leaning forward across the desk to examine Bash more closely.
“You mean I should be saying things like ‘ooh err’ and ‘arrrg, matey,’ I suppose,” Bash says agreeably, affecting a broad west-country accent. Why, I wonder, is the west country so associated with piracy? He’s from the south coast anyway.
“You do look like a pirate,” Sasha says, glancing at me. Apparently, I’m the only person alive who has no idea what a pirate looks like. “But he’s right; you don’t talk like a pirate.”
Bash shrugs. “What can I say? Those years in the merchant marines must have been very improving.”
Yenny tips his head to one side, scrutinizing Bash, who lounges, as insouciant as ever, under his gaze.
“Rather well-dressed for a pirate,” he finally pronounces.
“I try,” Bash agrees.
“Excuse me,” someone behind me says, and we all whirl around in surprise. Someone is at the till. With three books. And the expectant expression of a potential customer.
“Hiii,” Sasha says, loudly. “Amazing choices. Tardigard’s Revenge is one of my favorites.”