Chapter 16 Kris
“Thanks for coming with me today,” I tell Jules. He’s sitting next to me at the local branch of my insurance company. I wanted to ask Dave, but it sounded too needy in my head, even though he helped me get through that phone call a few days ago. The more I crave his time and attention, the stronger I feel like I have to stay away to avoid a catastrophe.
“Anytime, my friend. Is this the last thing you need to do before they close your case?”
Jules and I are squeezed onto a small waiting room couch in the insurance company branch office.
“This, and a final walkthrough of my property.” I look around the room. It’s everything I’ve avoided my whole life: boring, gray, and predictable.
“When will the walkthrough be?” Jules asks.
There’s honest care and concern in his eyes. He even tied up his hair and wore a button down and tried to look less like a death-metal god. It makes my chest squeeze. I know I don’t deserve a friend like him.
“They’ll give me a time after I get through today.”
“And then?”
“I rebuild, I guess.”
Jules nods and stays quiet for a minute.
“So, you’re having doubts.”
If it was anyone but my best friend, I would deny it, but Jules knows me too well.
“I don’t know if I’d call it doubts. It’s just going to be so much work to rebuild, even with the money. I’ll need to pour my whole self into it, and I don’t know if I have it in me to do it again.”
“I see. Do you have an alternate plan?”
“Not really. I’m still promoting a couple of bands while I’m not making lattes, but it’s not enough for me.”
“But rebuilding the club is too much?”
“Maybe. I was thinking I could buy a new venue, something smaller, but the thought of starting from zero feels like a total suck fest.”
“I get that. Plus, there’s Dave.”
“What do you mean there’s Dave?” I ask, knowing I sound defensive. I haven’t told Jules about my hookup with Dave, so don’t know why he’s bringing him up.
“It seems like the two of you…” he trails off and raises his eyebrows meaningfully.
“Yeah, I mean the two of us are, uh, getting along well. But that’s just a thing for the moment.”
“Ah.”
“What do you mean ‘ah?’” I turn to him and narrow my eyes, but Jules isn’t intimidated at all. In fact, his eyes soften sympathetically.
“How long have I known you, Kris?”
“Fifteen years. So what?” I look away to pick at my nails.
“In fifteen years, I’ve never seen you look at anyone the way you look at Dave.”
“Not even that drummer in Pocatello?” I look back at him.
“Not even him.”
I let that information settle into my brain.
“So, what are you going to do about it?” Jules asks.
“Nothing? I don’t have any plans. I’ll be gone soon and then, that’s it, I guess.” I fidget around. Why do they make this furniture so uncomfortable?
“It doesn’t have to be it,” Jules says gently, calming me.
“Can you picture Dave hanging out at my club?”
“No, but Neil and I have managed to bridge those differences.”
I huff out a breath.
“Yeah, but you and Neil are different.”
“How?”
“You’re like, good, kind people.”
Jules rolls his eyes.
“Kris, you should know I’m not with Neil out of kindness. I’m a greedy bastard when it comes to him. Eventually, I had to admit I wanted him too much to let him go, and luckily, he felt the same. I guess what I’m saying is it’s not selfish to go after someone you like if they like you back.”
“You’re making me sound soft.”
“Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone.”
“Mr. Wagonner?”
Jules and I swivel toward the inner door to see a well-dressed young woman holding a clipboard. She looks barely old enough to drive, but judging from her outfit, she’s the adult in charge of my case.
“That’s me.” I stand up to face her and I feel Jules standing behind me.
“Great, I’m Angelica.” She smiles and holds out a hand to shake. Now I feel bad for getting so grumpy with her. “Thanks for coming here today. Let’s get your paperwork signed so we can move on with things. Sound good?”
“Sure.”
“Awesome!” She motions to the door. “Follow me.”
Man, Angelica is a better person than I am. If I had dealt with a dickhead client like me, you can bet they’d be getting plenty of attitude right now. But I guess Angelica is a real professional, and probably she’s ready to be done with me. I think it also means I’m that much closer to getting my money. So why is my stomach sinking?