Chapter 19
Tuck
Practice was brutal today, and my left shoulder is aching as I step into the house. But the second I cross the threshold, my nose is hit with something rich, warm, and delicious. My stomach grumbles in agreement.
“Hey,” I call out, spotting a big bowl piled high with chips and candy bars. Shit. I completely forgot it was Halloween. The boys reminded me last Sunday when I drove them to hockey, but it slipped my mind.
“In here,” Maria answers from the kitchen.
I kick off my boots, tug off my jacket, and my stomach growls louder as I head to the kitchen. When I enter, I catch Maria quickly tucking something into her bag, and for a split second, it feels like she’s trying to hide something from me. Then she reaches for a book and slides it into the bag.
“Cooking and studying at the same time?” I ask, keeping a small distance. The boys could come barreling in any second.
“I steal whatever time I can,” she says, as she snaps her bag shut.
I glance around. “The boys home?”
“Upstairs. Josh is getting ready to go out trick-or-treating with Trey. They’re going alone, but Tanner is taking Stella and plans to keep an eye on them. Just don’t tell Josh,” she jokes. “Lucas is off to a party at Levi’s house.”
I arch a brow and take a small step closer. “So that means I can steal a kiss.”
“It does.”
I pull her into my arms, my lips finding hers in a deep, hungry kiss that makes my shoulder flare in pain. I wince but don’t let go.
When I pull back, she’s studying me, concern written across her face. “Are you hurt?”
“Just a bruise,” I say, rolling my shoulder. “Nothing an ice pack and some gel won’t fix.”
“How about a massage?”
“If you’re offering, I’m accepting,” I say.
She chuckles as she lightly runs her hands over my chest. “Hard practice?”
“Well,” I tease, pressing her closer. “Something’s hard now.”
She grins, and I glance past her shoulder. “You don’t have to cook for me all the time, you know.”
“It’s my love language,” she says, then shakes her head quickly. “I mean…I love to cook. And you deserve a meal on the table after everything you’re doing for us.”
“What did you make?”
“Mom, when’s dinner ready?” Josh calls from upstairs. “I’m starving. Wait, is Tuck home?”
“I’m in here,” I call back, tilting my head, curious.
Maria points her spatula at me, a cheeky grin spreading across her face. “He has something he wants to ask you.”
“That sounds ominous.”
“Not ominous,” she teases. “Flattering.”
Josh skids into the kitchen on his socked feet, Marbles tucked under his arm. “Hey, Tuck. I…uh…I was wondering if I could wear one of your old jerseys tonight. I’m going as Tuck Delray.”
I laugh. “Sure. I’ve got a few. Let me grab one for you.”
He holds Marbles up and nuzzles him. “Sweet.” Marbles lets out a loud meow, and Josh tucks him back under his arm, turning to me.
“Are you going out with us too?” Then, like he’s embarrassed by the question, he adds, “I don’t need anyone taking me.
” He straightens, trying to look taller.
“I just mean…Tanner’s taking Stella, and he’ll probably want us to help her get to the doors.
You guys could just hang back on the sidewalk. ”
I bite back a laugh, remembering those days—my parents helping out, but me insisting I didn’t want to be seen with them.
I scrub my face, and my shoulder twinges. “I haven’t really thought about it,” I admit.
He shrugs like it’s no big deal, but I catch the way his face drops. Damn it. He really wants me there. How the hell can I let the kid down?
“Tuck hurt his shoulder at practice,” Maria says, giving me an out, and I appreciate that she does.
“Oh, sorry, man. You okay?”
“I’m okay,” I say with a grin, liking his genuine concern. It pulls at something inside me, and I soften. “You’re right, Tanner will probably want someone to hang with. But if I go…will you share your candy with me?”
His face lights up instantly. “Sure! And if anyone gives me apples, they’re all yours.”
I laugh at that, then listen to Josh chatter with Maria as I dart upstairs to grab a couple of jerseys. I poke my head into Lucas’s room when I hear him laughing on the phone. He looks up at me, and I’m about to turn away. But then he waves me in, and I take a few steps closer as he ends the call.
“Look,” he says, holding up a small box.
Light catches on the silver heart locket inside. My chest tightens a little. “She’s going to love it,” I say, smiling. He beams at my approval, then closes the box, but I can tell something else is weighing on him.
I hesitate. “Everything okay?”
He nods quickly, but there’s a twitch in his expression I can’t miss. “Yeah… we’re going to Levi’s tonight. He’s having a party. Well, not really a party. Just a few friends. His parents stocked us up with candy.”
“That sounds fun,” I say, but I study him. Something’s off.
“Levi’s parents are…pretty chill,” he adds.
If they’re so chill, why does he look like he’s carrying the weight of the world?
“They’re also going to a party, so it’s just Levi and his girlfriend, Ari, and me. We have the place to ourselves…and Levi has a hot tub.”
Oh, fuck. I know exactly where this is going.
I take a small step closer, trying to keep it casual. “You know how to be careful, right, Lucas?”
His face turns bright red. He picks at an imaginary speck on the bedspread. “Yeah…of course,” he snorts, like that will hide how mortified he is.
“Then…you have protection?”
He doesn’t look at me. He shakes his head. “No. But…I think I should.”
Goddammit. My chest tightens. When I was his age—hell, younger—my dad had sat me down, warned me about girls, about taking responsibility, about consequences. Then he gave me condoms. But Lucas doesn’t have a father to lean on. Right now, under my roof, I’m the closest thing he has to one.
Do I just…hook him up?
My mind races. What would his mom say? Should I tell her? Did my dad even tell Mom? And most importantly…what’s the right thing to do for him?
“Wait here.”
I drag my feet across the floor, hand running through my hair as I wrestle with this. I step into my room, pull open my nightstand, and grab a few condoms. Shit. I hope Maria doesn’t kill me for this. But the alternative—letting him go in blind—is worse.
When I return, Lucas is still sitting on his bed, fidgeting. His T-shirt catches my eye. Cereal Killer. I laugh, shaking my head. “Nice…very fitting, considering I can’t keep cereal in the house.”
He chuckles nervously, glancing at me with anticipation. I sit down on the edge of the bed, my feet planted firmly on the floor. “Take these.” I hand him the condoms. He hesitates for half a second, then accepts them.
“Thanks, Tuck.”
His words catch in his throat, and my chest tightens again. I like being here for him, being someone he trusts enough to come to with a problem. It hits me how much that matters—how much he needs guidance and safety. Despite the rules, despite the distance I should keep, I can’t turn my back.
I didn’t become captain because I step aside when people need me. I didn’t become captain to abandon my team, or anyone who counts on me. And Lucas…right now, he’s my team.
“It’s good that you came to me,” I say, keeping my voice steady, even though my chest tightens a little.
“I wanted to go to the store to get some, but I never have wheels anymore.”
I hesitate. No, I’m not his father, and I’m not supposed to be handling this…but it wouldn’t feel right to just hand him condoms without a little guidance. “Lucas…no means no, right? It never means yes?”
“Yeah. Got it.”
“You treat a girl with respect,” I continue. “And what happens between the two of you stays between the two of you, okay?”
He chuckles. “I’m not Nicklas.”
Jesus.
“Do you have any questions?”
He casts me a fast glance, blinking rapidly, lips tightening into a thin line. “Are you going to tell Mom?”
My stomach twists. This is a really fucking awkward position. I’m not his father. Not his guardian. Not anything official. “Do you not want me to?”
“I don’t know. It’s weird.”
“It is,” I admit. “But I don’t think we should keep secrets.” Jesus I’m one to talk. I place my hand on his shoulder and give it a reassuring squeeze. “Honestly, Lucas, I think she’d be happy to know you’re being responsible.”
He nods, a tight, almost self-conscious smile tugging at his lips. “Yeah you’re probably right.”
He stands, shoving the condoms into his back pocket. His gaze flickers back to me, curious, thoughtful. “Why do you have condoms if you never go out? You have bunnies throwing themselves at you, but you’re always here with Mom.”
Shit.
I stiffen, heat creeping up my neck. Before he can connect the dots—and I think he already has—I step toward the door. “Do you need a ride to Levi’s?”
“He’s picking me up.” He scratches the back of his head, and then hesitates. “Tuck, are you and—”
Before he can finish, Maria calls from downstairs. Thank fucking God. I jerk my thumb toward the stairs. “Head down. I need to grab a jersey for Josh.”
Lucas gives me a small, awkward nod, and I duck out, heart still racing. I root through my closet and find the smallest jersey, then grab one for myself. If I’m going out, I might as well go as myself. Josh can be my twin. I tug it on and head back downstairs.
In the kitchen, I pause. Josh and Lucas are setting the table, working together, and it hits me how much I love watching this. My heart beats a little faster, and I have to pull myself together when I catch Maria looking at me. I toss Josh the jersey.
He beams at me. “Thanks, man.”
“What can I do to help?” I ask Maria.
“Nothing. Your shoulder is sore. Sit, let me serve you.”
A groan rumbles up from my chest—meant only for her ears—because yeah, the idea of her serving me in more ways than one hits in numerous places. I drop into the chair, and a moment later, a big bowl of beef stew lands in front of me.
“This looks incredible. Like good old fashioned East Coast cooking. Mom would be proud.”
She chuckles softly. “Boston and Nova Scotia aren’t so different.”
She sets bowls in front of the boys, and they dig in eagerly.
“Mom, this is amazing,” Josh says, mouth half full.
She smiles at him, love evident in her eyes. “Something hearty to keep you warm out there tonight.”
My chest tightens. She is such an incredible mother, and one day…one day I’d love to see her have the daughter she dreams about as well. Just not with Declan, or any other man. Damn.
“Boys, Grandma and Grant are coming tomorrow night for Sunday dinner. Tuck, you’re welcome to join us too.”
“Of course he’s coming, Mom,” Lucas says with a snorting laugh. “He lives here.”
Maria laughs. “Yes, but we’re going back home in the morning. We can’t stay here all the time.”
Josh rips into a dinner roll. “But Tuck is going away Monday, and what’s the point of going home for one day just to come back? It’s much easier to stay. Isn’t that right, Tuck?”
“Josh,” she warns in that soft, motherly tone I’ve come to know. “I can’t have dinner guests at Tuck’s place. That’s not right.”
“Dinner guests?” Lucas snorts. “Grandma and Grant aren’t guests, Mom. They’re part of the hockey family too. We’re all family.”
Family.
The word hits me like a punch to the chest.
It’s the one thing I’ve always wanted.
“Josh is right,” I say softly. “It doesn’t make sense. I’m just worried about Marbles, though. Isn’t your mother allergic?”
“I can keep him in the other room,” Josh offers, ever the helper.
Maria hesitates, looking at me. “Are you sure, Tuck?”
I shrug, taking in the concern in her eyes. “Yeah. No problem.”
“Okay. I’ll check with Mom,” she says, a small smile tugging at her lips.
We all dig into our delicious food and just as we’re finishing, the doorbell rings. “That must be Tanner and Stella,” Maria says, standing to clear the table.
I set my utensils on my plate. “Let me help.”
“Nope, you guys go. I’m going to quickly clean up and hit the books.”
Josh runs to the door, and opens it. The first words out of Stella’s mouth. “Where’s Marbles?”
“Come on. He’s sleeping.”
They come into the kitchen followed by Tanner, who is dressed as a pirate. “You coming out?” he asks me.
I hold my arms out. “Last minute costume.” My gaze goes to Stella. “Don’t you look cute.”
She gives me the side eye. “Cute? I’m a lion, Uncle Tuck.”
“Fierce,” I correct. “I meant you look fierce.”
She gives me a once over. “Why aren’t you dressed up?” She has a sly look on her face, and leans into me when her father turns to talk to Josh. “I thought you might go dressed as a wart.”
Oh my God.
“They didn’t have a wart costume in my size,” I shoot back. “I thought I’d go as a hockey player.”
“Real original,” she snorts.
I hold my hands out. “My calluses are almost gone.” Thanks to Maria, who has been using her lotion on me.
She leans in for a closer inspection and crinkles up her nose. “Not gone yet.”
“Hey, I’m getting there.”
She huffs. “Uncle Tuck, when are you going to get married?”
Why is my damn love life so important to this little girl?
“Hello Stella,” Maria says, coming to my rescue. “I love your costume.”
“Thanks,” she says and smooths her hand over her fur collar. Then her eyes go big, like she just had an epiphany and my heart nearly stops. Because, I have a feeling—even though she’s only five—she’s connecting the dots.
“Uncle Tuck,” she begins like she just solved world hunger. “Why don’t you marry Aunt Maria?”
Holy fucking God.