Chapter 11 #2
Cali remembered when he used to call. ‘I was just callin’ to check on your sneaky ass.
Where you at?’ Back then, she didn’t appreciate him for calling her, especially when she was with Braye.
If she could just hear the sound of his voice again, it would soothe her in ways she couldn’t explain.
Cali wasn’t the wife who went through her husband’s phone because she didn’t want him in hers.
However, she tapped on the photo app and was shocked to see that most of his gallery consisted of her.
“Wow,” she whispered to herself, amazed that he had pictures of her when she was a kid.
There were off-guard photos and pictures of her sleep.
He had pictures he had taken off her Instagram, making her wonder if he had a secret page.
After going through the countless photos of herself, Cali went to his text messages and his notes app.
She didn’t expect to find anything there, but when she tapped on it, she was stunned to see many notes.
Clicking on the first one, her lips parted when she read the first sentence.
I gotta get Cali to spend more time at home. We feel disconnected and it may be my fault cuz I’m always out in the streets. I need to make her a priority.
Cali cleared her throat of the emotions setting up shop. She tapped on another one.
I need to plan a getaway for me and Cali. I think she needs a vacation and uninterrupted time with me. I’m not doing enough for her. I gotta get my shit together before I lose her.
That one had done it for her. Rio blamed himself for their lack of connection when Cali had been the culprit all along. Dropping the phone in her lap, she covered her face and wept quietly.
“Cali, baby, you, okay?” Cecilia asked.
She had temporarily forgotten there were still people in the room.
Cali was so tired of crying. She would’ve thought her well ran dry, but tears continued every day, draining her like a wrung-out rag.
The guilt she had been battling was becoming more powerful by the day.
She couldn’t escape it. It was like her shadow, following her every move without any relief in sight.
“Yeah.” She sniffled, grabbing tissue from Irish. “I just had a moment but I’m good.”
Cali couldn’t explain that she was guilt-ridden because of her indiscretions.
There was no way to explain how Rio blamed himself for the breakdown in their marriage when it was her doing.
Her words failed her. Cali had to accept that she wasn’t shit.
She was nothing more than a woman who cheated on a man that loved her more than anything.
She didn’t deserve nothing, especially Rio.
A knock at the door brought their attention toward it. Seconds later, it opened, and Cali’s heart stopped momentarily. The first thing she spotted was a bouquet of roses but the person that followed made her mouth dry up like The Mojave Desert.
What the fuck…
Slowly, she rose from her seat, eyes expanded, looking at Braye as if he was a ghost. There was a subtle beam on his lips as he closed the door.
“How y’all doing?” he greeted them.
“Hey.” Irish waved.
“Hello, who might you be?” Ruthia asked in a friendly but curious tone.
“Oh, um, I work with Calia. I heard about her husband and wanted to offer some support.”
Cali was still frozen in her stance as her chest tightened with each breath she inhaled. This was bad. So terrible that she felt as if she would shit on herself at any second.
“Well, that’s kind of you. I’ll take these,” Cecilia offered.
Braye passed the flowers to her, and he began walking toward Cali. Her stare was fierce as he gave her a friendly hug. It was one that didn’t alarm the others that this had been her beau for the last three years.
“How are you?” he quizzed, smiling like this was a normal occurrence.
Didn’t Braye know that Cali was on the verge of a mental breakdown? Was he not aware that she was broken because her husband was on the brink of death? How could he do this to her? Showing up like this was a game was the quickest way for Cali to crash out.
“I’m great,” she managed to say through her fog of anger.
“You look beautiful.” He examined her before he peered at Rio. “So, what the doctors say?”
“Braye, can you walk to the cafeteria with me?” she asked but didn’t wait for an answer as she headed toward the door.
Cali stepped out of the room and walked down the hall.
She knew Braye was behind her because she heard his heavy footsteps.
She was so incensed that sweat beads formed on her nose.
She approached the elevator, pressing the button.
Seconds later, the doors opened, and she and Braye stepped on.
Once they closed, Cali turned to him, flashing him with eyes that could set him on fire if she tried. She swung and hit him in his chest.
“Have you lost your fucking mind?” she blared, repeatedly swinging her fist at him.
“What?” He held her arms, matching her attitude. “You fucking blocked me and got the nerve to be mad that I showed up here? What the fuck is your problem?”
“Yeah, I blocked you because I’m a fucking wife who’s trying to make sure my husband comes out of a coma. What aren’t you comprehending, huh?” She snatched out of his grasp. “Where, in your fucked-up mind, did you think it was cool for you to bring your ass here?”
“I fu—”
The doors to the elevator opened and a woman stepped on, silencing Braye’s rant. They remained silent, chests heaving while looking forward. When they arrived on the main floor, they all stepped out, and Cali led Braye outside to the parking lot.
“You got some fucking nerve being mad ‘cause I showed up. Like you ain’t sell me this dream about us being together. You go from promising me you gon’ leave his ass to blockin’ me? What kind of shit is that, Calia?”
“Keep your voice down,” she gritted, looking around.
There had been so many members of TLM making their rounds that she didn’t want to risk anyone hearing Braye confirm their affair.
“Or what? You don't want people knowing you a cheating-ass bitch that sell dreams to a nigga and block him?”
Cali couldn’t believe her eyes. What used to be a man who she adored with everything in her being was now a man that she couldn’t stomach. Everything about Braye disgusted her. He was emotional, reckless, and inconsiderate of her position.
“You know what?” She squared her shoulders, holding her chin up while her eyes slightly narrowed. “I am a cheating-ass bitch who had an affair on my husband. Yes, I was going to leave him to be with you but that’s not happening ever.”
Braye’s head drew back as his thick brows crinkled. “Word? Ever?”
“Yeah, that’s right. I took vows with Rio and I wanna honor them. You have no place in my life right now. I have to remain committed to my husband, and you need to accept that.”
“Accept?” He cocked his head. “Bitch, have you lost your mind? You don't get to lead me on for three years then back out like I’m a fucking plaything.”
Braye was right; Cali had played with his feelings for three long years.
She had promised him a future with every intent on keeping her word.
Nonetheless, the script had flipped. Their movie was no longer a love story.
It had quickly turned into a horror film, and Cali was the one running away to safety.
Rio was her safe haven. She hadn’t realized it when he was well, but he was who she felt safest with.
He needed her and she couldn’t bear to walk away.
“Look.” She pressed her palms together. “I apologize for whatever pain this may have caused you. I understand your frustrations and yo—”
“You don't understand shit,” he interrupted her. “You don't give a fuck about anybody but your got damn self. You think that God created the world for you and you only? You think you the only motherfucka that matters? I can’t believe your selfish ass.”
Cali had enough self-awareness to know that she was in the wrong. It wasn’t fair to Braye for him to be dismissed at a moment’s notice. He was entitled to some sort of closure. He had been wrapped in Cali’s chaos for years and didn’t deserve to be thrown away like trash.
“Listen, Braye”—her voice staggered with emotion—“I’m sorry.
I really am. I wish this didn’t happen. I wish Rio was awake, and I wish you didn’t have to deal with this rejection.
I get it. I’m a horrible person. I led you to believe that we could be together and I had every intention on making it work.
Truth is, I can’t walk away from Rio. He needs me and I need him. ”
Braye snorted a laugh. “You really the worst bitch in the world but it’s cool.” He nodded. “Have a good life, Calia.” He walked toward her and wrapped his arms around her body.
Not even his touch felt the same. It was like a mark of death. One that made her shudder with shame instead of goosebumps.
“If you think you're about to get a happily ever after, think again,” he whispered, pulling back.
Cali’s eyes dilated as she gaped at Braye. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
“It means you don't get to sow bullshit and expect a harvest. Good luck, baby. I hope that nigga wakes up and see you for what you really are.”
Braye walked away, leaving Cali speechless.
His words haunted her, making her feel like he had spoken a curse over her life.
She already had to deal with the guilt from her actions.
Cali had no mental space to ruminate over his words.
Her actions had been detrimental to her mind and her marriage.
What would she do if she couldn’t have Rio and right her wrongs?
Cali stood in the parking lot for a while, trying to gain some mental clarity.
Braye’s unpredictable visit had rocked her being.
At her wits end, Cali wished she could clock out on life for a while.
Her bed had been calling her name. She just wanted to bury herself under her duvet and wake up when her life wasn’t in shambles.
The sliding doors to the hospital opened, and Irish stepped outside. Her ginger brows were scrunched as she approached her.
“What’s going on?”
Leave it to Irish to know something wasn’t right. Braye’s presence had stunned her too badly to try and play it off with her.
“That was Braye,” she admitted in a mumble.
Irish gasped before covering her mouth with her hand. For a few moments, they stood in silence, staring at each other.
“What the fuck, Cali? Why did he come here?”
“To fuck with me. He’s mad I blocked him and now he’s showing up to terrorize me. I don't know what to do.” She exhaled, pacing back and forth.
“Oh, my God, Cali, you gotta do something. You can’t let people find this shit out. You’ll be killed.”
Cali quickly snapped her head at her. “You think so?”
“You know how loved Rio is, especially in TLM. Those young niggas wouldn’t hesitate to honor him by taking you out.
That’s the biggest theme in TLM. Loyalty is what drive those niggas and if they found out you had your side dude come to the hospital, they would see that as disrespect. You gotta stop his ass.”
“What do you think I’m trying to do!” she bellowed, planting her hand on her fresh pixie. “I’m trying, Irish, I swear.” Her voice softened as an ache choked her. “I don't know what to do. The walls are closing in on me. I’m this close to checking out.”
Irish quickly embraced her. Cali was tired of being hugged and she was tired of being told she was strong. Cali was flat out fatigued with life. She needed some relief before she burst from all the pressure built up inside of her.
“I know, friend,” Irish murmured, cupping her face. “It’ll all be over soon. Our prayers will be answered. Just keep holding on and remember I’m right here with you.”
Cali nodded, but weakness spread all over her body. Her faith had unexpectedly been emptied from her tank, but she would keep holding on for Rio’s sake.
“Do you hear me?” Irish asked.
“Yes, I hear you.”
“In the meantime, you gotta keep that nigga away from you. Should I send some people to see about him?”
Cali read between the lines and knew that wouldn’t be a good idea. Braye was a man who was hurt, and she had inflicted his pain. Bringing harm to him would make her feel worse than what she did, so she shook her head.
“No, I think he’ll stay away. I hurt him too badly for him to show up here again.”
“Are you sure?”
She bobbed her head.
“Okay, well, I’m gonna head out. It’s Wilde’s birthday, and Jovanis invited me to the club. Unless you want me to stay with you.”
“No, Irish. You’ve been such a blessing. Don't let me stop you from having fun. Make sure you have a drink for me too.” She smirked.
“I got you.”
The women hugged once more before they parted ways. Cali entered the hospital feeling as if she weighed over a ton. Life had been so cruel to her, but she couldn’t bask in her agony because Rio was in far worst shape.