Chapter 10
L eonie’s whistle sounded outside the cabin, making Honey jump. A second later, the head counselor poked her head through the door.
“Ten minute warning!” Leonie announced cheerfully. “Ready, Honey?”
Honey swallowed hard. She had never felt less ready for anything in her entire life. She did her best to muster a confident smile.
“Almost,” she said. For about the millionth time, she smoothed down the blanket on the nearest bunk bed, tucking the corners in even tighter. “I just need to fix these beds.”
“You really don’t.” Leonie’s eyebrows rose a little as she looked around the immaculate dorm room.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen such a spotless cabin.
You realize that the weekly ‘cleanest den’ prize is for the kids, right?
Learning to keep their own space tidy is an important part of developing their independence. ”
“I know, I know.” Honey nervously plumped up a pillow. “I just want them to have a good summer. At least I can make the cabin perfect for them.”
“Hey.” Leonie padded into the room, every step so soft and fluid that Honey could barely believe that she’d ever not realized this woman could turn into a lion. “Getting last minute nerves?”
Honey’s hands twisted in the pillow. “Just a bit.”
“It’s okay, you know.” Leonie took the pillow away from her, setting it back on the bed. “I’ve been doing this for a few years now, and I still get butterflies in my stomach right before the campers arrive. I’d be more worried if you weren’t nervous. Anything in particular on your mind?”
In the warmth of those soft, understanding eyes, Honey almost broke. Every instinct told her she could trust Leonie. She wanted to trust her. The weight of her secret was like a backpack full of rocks.
Only the memory of Buck kept her from confessing the truth. Those black, piercing eyes, fixed on her own; the raw desperation in his voice. Please. I need you.
Still, she couldn’t flat out lie to Leonie’s kind, compassionate face. She moistened her dry lips, trying to think what to say.
“I’m worried that I can’t be the counselor that the kids deserve.” It was true, after all. “I can’t help feeling that I don’t belong here. That I should never have come in the first place.”
“I think you are exactly where you belong,” Leonie said, with such emphasis that Honey couldn’t doubt that she meant it. “Look, I don’t want to pry, but… is this about Buck?”
What? Honey blinked at the lead counselor, nonplussed. “Why would it be about Buck?”
“No reason,” Leonie said, a touch too quickly. “Just checking. I’m happy you’re getting along. Even if I’m a bit surprised at, ah, how well you seem to be getting along.”
Heat rose up Honey’s neck as she remembered how Leonie had almost walked in on Buck in her room. No wonder the head counselor had the wrong idea about their relationship.
“It’s not like that,” she said, hoping that her blush wasn’t too visible. “I mean, we were just talking. Nothing inappropriate.”
“Don’t get me wrong. There’s no rule against staff relationships.” Leonie grinned; a sudden white, bright flash of teeth. She winked. “Especially under these circumstances. Just try to keep it discreet in front of the kids, okay?”
Honey almost laughed. Leonie certainly had nothing to worry about there. Buck had made that crystal clear.
Unbidden, her mind flashed back to that moment yesterday, when Buck had begged her to stay. The heat of his hands on either side of her own. The way his mouth had shaped those three intoxicating words: I need you.
And like an absolute idiot , for a moment she’d let herself believe he meant something else.
She’d tried to hide her reaction, but she knew he’d seen it.
And she’d seen the sudden dismay in his eyes; felt his reflexive twitch as he recoiled.
Just the memory of that moment made her want to crawl into a hole and never come out.
She knew he hadn’t been trying to manipulate her. Buck was too honest and direct to play games like that. He’d only been thinking of the kids. She should only have been thinking about the kids.
Not how he’d looked, down on his knees in front of her. Not how her skin had tingled at his touch.
Aaaaaaand she was thinking about him again .
Honey thrust the memory back in its box, firmly burying it at the back of her mental closet. She drew herself up, pulling on a smile like armor.
“You don’t need to worry,” she said to Leonie. “Buck and I will be perfectly professional, I promise.”
Honey had intended to reassure Leonie, but to her surprise her words seemed to have the opposite effect. The head counselor’s own smile faltered, her eyebrows pinching together. She looked as though she was about to say something, but then her watch beeped.
“Oh, crud.” Leonie checked the time, then her clipboard. “The buses are due to arrive any second, and I’m four minutes behind schedule. We’d both better move. But let’s talk later, okay?”
Leonie dashed out the door without waiting for a response, her whistle already between her lips.
Honey heard the shrill blast echo outside, followed by a shout of, “All counselors, report to your muster points! This is not a drill, people! Put on your game faces and get ready to welcome your campers!”
Casting a last glance around the cabin to check that everything was in order, Honey headed out. Counselors were streaming from all directions, heading for the central square with its big firepit. Signs had been tacked to the surrounding buildings, each one bearing a number.
Leonie’s whistle cut through the din. She stood on the porch outside the main office, where everyone could see her.
“Okay, team!” she called. She waved a hand, indicating the numbered signs.
“You should all know your pack assignment by now. Grab your co-counselor and go stand by your number, so your campers will be able to find you. You’ll find markers and labels waiting there so you can make yourself name badges. ”
The crowd broke up, counselors searching for their own points. Honey spotted Ragvald, looming head and shoulders above everyone else, following Moira like a loyal hound. Catching her eye, he gave her a cheery wave, bearded face splitting in a broad grin.
“Good hunting, shield-sister!” he boomed, deep voice carrying clearly over the heads of the crowd. “May your young spear-carriers be stout of heart and strong of arm, that you may lead them to many great victories in the battles to come!”
“Ragvald.” Even through the rising babble, Honey could make out the weariness in Moira’s tone. “Ragvald, no.”
Honey waved back at Ragvald, then hurried to her own number—a big blue ‘3’ pinned to the front of the dining hall. Buck was already there, expression even blacker than usual, which was quite a feat. Estelle, Rufus, Beth, and Finley huddled nearby in a tight knot.
“Hi kids,” Honey said to them. “Excited to meet your new friends?”
Unenthusiastic mumbles came in response. Finley fidgeted. Beth was standing so straight, she was practically vibrating, while Rufus had hunched in on himself as though trying to disappear. Even Estelle looked more terrified than excited.
“Hey, now.” She softened her tone, her own apprehension dissolving. “It’s okay to be nervous. Most of them will be new to camp too, remember? I bet they all feel exactly the same way that you do right now.”
Finley’s throat bobbed. “I’m not so sure about that.”
“If you feel worried or overwhelmed at any point, come talk to me or Buck. We’re here to help.
” Honey cast around for something to distract them, and her eye fell on the box of stationery supplies waiting under the sign.
“But right now, I need your help. I think we should all have name tags, not just me and Buck. Rufus, Estelle, when the other campers get here, can you be in charge of passing out pens and labels? Finley, you make sure all the boys write their names, and Beth, you do the same for the girls. But first, find your favorite color and write your own name tag.”
They all looked happier at being given something to do. All four squatted around the box, and were soon arguing over pens.
Selecting a bright pink marker for herself, Honey wrote her own name on a label and stuck it to the front of her t-shirt. Looking round for Buck, she discovered him still standing a little way off, arms crossed over his chest.
“You need a name tag too,” she reminded him.
He made no move to take a pen. “I’m already wearing the motherloving shirt. I’m not labeling myself like a damn Christmas present, too.”
“Then I’ll do it for you.” Taking another label, she wrote BUCK in big, friendly letters. On sudden wicked impulse, she added a little smiley face to the top part of the B before holding the label out to him. “Here you go.”
Buck looked down at the name tag, then at her. His eyebrows were very expressive.
“Just be glad I don’t have any glitter.” Peeling the label off the backing paper, she slapped it onto his chest. “There. All set.”
He grunted, returning his gaze to the entrance to the camp.
It wasn’t just his expression that was grimmer than normal, she realized.
There was a drawn tightness to his face; a hint of smudged shadow under his eyes.
They’d both stayed up late last night, going over everything she needed to know about shifters, but now she wondered if Buck had gone to bed at all.
“Hey.” She lowered her voice so that the kids wouldn’t overhear. “Couldn’t sleep?”
“Didn’t dare,” he replied, somewhat cryptically. He shook his head. “Don’t worry about it. I’ve done longer days on less rest.”
“Were you worrying about the plan? If you’re having second thoughts—”
“No,” he interrupted firmly. Sounds came from the direction of the parking lot—the crunch of wheels over gravel, and the squeal of brakes. “This is it. You ready?”
Honey swallowed, a flutter of nerves returning. “As ready as I’ll ever be.”