Chapter 40 Bench Me, Heart
BENCH ME, HEART
Nate
“If anyone wants me, I’ll just be over here. Icing my emotional damage.”
Nate lay on the couch, hoodie half-zipped, the TV flickering with something he wasn’t watching.
The room still smelled like her. Vanilla and sweat and something citrusy from her dry shampoo.
That, more than anything, made it hard to breathe.
He should’ve turned his phone off. Should’ve done what his PR handler always begged and just ignored his socials altogether. But he didn’t.
Instead, he opened the app. The red one. The doom scroller. And there they were, hundreds of clips from the Paso. Fan edits. Reaction stitches. Voiceovers about yearning and submission and can you believe he looked at her like THAT.
He watched their final pose again, the one someone had overlaid with audio of a fire alarm. Him sliding under her long legs, ready to serve her with his face tipped up at hers, like worship.
And then came the comments.
Good thing Holly has him there to keep Lars in line.
Kinda obvious what role he plays in that relationship… I’m living for it.
Not gonna lie, it’s giving bodyguard energy. Woof.
His chest tightened.
Okay but real talk? He’s great when he’s with Holly. But what’s he like without her? That temper? That rep? Idk man…
He’s hot but he’s definitely punched a wall during an argument before. Red flag rodeo, anyone?
He locked his phone. Threw it on the coffee table. But it buzzed anyway.
HAMMERHEADS: MURDER LINE EDITION
Cash
bro. brO
just saw the rehearsal footage
you dancing like your girl cheated on you with a curling stick
you good?
Zeke
it’s giving “I’m fine” written in eyeliner on a steamed mirror.
on behalf of the team and literally every viewer with eyes:
FIX. IT.
Alex
You guys… maybe he’s just processing his feelings?
Leo
Stop saying FEELINGS, Alex, Jesus Christ
Jaime
No.
He’s sulking.
Like a 6’4” baby swan who lost his favorite hoodie in the divorce
Hunter
If he doesn’t sort it, I’m putting cow shit in his gear bag.
Again.
Leo
Real talk, are you trying to lose?
Because she danced like she wanted to crawl inside your ribs and live there
and you looked like you were at her funeral.
Get your shit together, amigo.
Roman
[attached gif: someone getting body-checked into oblivion]
me to nate if he screws this up
Nate
did you all just form a support group to roast my ass
or do you have something helpful to add?
Zeke
It’s not a support group.
It’s a public health intervention.
You’re dragging the team vibe down like a sad prom playlist.
Nate
I’m not even in the state right now!
Zeke
Exactly, man.
That’s how bad it is.
Cash
Nah it’s actually beautiful
He fake dated her
Then real fell for her
Then got exposed mid-ice makeout and now he’s dancing like he lost custody of the dog
Iconic behavior
Nate
i’m fine
it’s just the routine
not everything’s about feelings
Alex
I used to say stuff like that before therapy too
Jaime
Listen, idiot.
You’ve got half the league betting on whether you’ll cry or combust first.
So either go win this damn thing with your fake-girlfriend-soulmate
Or let me know where to send the sympathy cupcakes.
Hunter
Get it done, nate.
Dunno if she’ll go to OT buddy
Leo
The man once broke someone’s nose for chirping you.
And you can’t even look her in the eye?
Cash
…and on today’s episode of ‘Nate Has Feelings and We All Suffer’…
Leo
F WORD, CASH FUCKING HELL
Zeke changed the name of the chat to
‘Sad Himbo Support Squad’.
Nate has left the chat.
Jaime
He’ll be back
Nate turned his face into the couch cushion. Closed his eyes. He’d thought Holly was different. Had felt like maybe he was finally someone worth choosing. But maybe he’d just been convenient. Useful. A weapon with rhythm.
And he was so fucking sick of being the damn weapon.