Chapter Three #2
“This morning, and I’m not exactly sure how long, but she did complain about lockjaw,” Dante answers.
Cheers go up around the room at his bragging, and I’m trying to react, but I really can’t get my mind off Skylar’s sudden shift in behavior. Or the fact that he never put his pants back on and his bare thigh keeps brushing against my jean-covered one!
I’m going to die on Skylar’s birthday.
As it gets to Henry’s turn, he looks straight at me and asks, “Truth or dare, Everett?”
Skylar nudges me, whispering “Dare” in my direction almost as if to bait me.
“Dare,” I say, because of course I do.
“I dare you to tell us your biggest kink.”
My eyes widen, and I stammer, “W-what?! When did this game get so dirty?”
“We’re in college, dude.” Kelly says it like it’s obvious.
Skylar scoffs. “Come on, you’re way more experienced than you’re letting on. Just say it.”
His eyes are once again curious and probing.
The issue is, I don’t know my biggest kink. Sure, I have a lot of sex, but it isn’t necessarily kinky sex. Will I embarrass myself if I say that? Should I lie?
No, Skylar will know if I do; he knows me too well.
Everyone is waiting, patient but breath-bated. I guess I’ll share the one thing I know I like for sure—the one thing that comes as naturally to me as climaxing does.
“Well, I wouldn’t say it’s my biggest kink, but I am a sucker for praise,” I say casually, like this isn’t a big deal or so embarrassing I might just die.
“Wait, like being praised by your girlfriend?” Henry asks, tilting his head ever so slightly.
“No, I mean praising someone. You know—” I clear my throat, feeling my face flush once more. “—like good girl or worshipping someone and all that.”
I take a large pull from my cup, trying to hide my shame.
Kelly whistles lowly. “I can see why you’re so popular, Ev.”
I laugh awkwardly at the compliment, letting my gaze find Skylar for the first time since the question was asked. He’s outwardly staring at me, expression empty as he dissociates.
Maybe he wasn’t listening, far too drunk to bother. A part of me hopes he wasn’t. I feel stupid.
“Anyway,” I interject, “Kelly, truth or dare?”
“Dare!”
“Uh…” I have to keep up with the theme or risk judgment from the crowd; I’m sure of it. “I dare you to kiss someone in the circle.” And after a moment, I add, “Anyone but me.”
“Asshole,” she mutters under her breath, then starts crawling toward me anyway—probably just to spite me.
Oh well, I guess I’ll let her. Kelly is pretty, and she might be close enough to be considered family, but one kiss won’t hurt.
Only, she crawls until she’s right next to me, planting herself right in front of Skylar.
“Oh, wow,” he giggles, face reddening slightly as he grins.
“Happy birthday, sweet Sky.” Then she presses her lips to his, and I feel all of the color in my face drain away.
It’s suddenly incredibly quiet throughout the apartment, as if all sound has been sucked out of the space. There’s no air left to breathe.
Kelly’s hand finds Skylar’s cheek as his eyelids flutter closed. They’re so close to me that I can see the stretch of his lips and the tense movement of his jaw.
As I catch a flash of his tongue pushing into her mouth, my hand shoots out, gently pushing her away with an awkward laugh. “Alright, alright. I said kiss, not eat each other.”
An inferno is burning within me as Kelly sends me a curious smile, big eyes twinkling in the dim living room lights. She gives Skylar a wink before moving back to her seat.
And little Skylar is fist-pumping the air as everyone cheers, clearly amused by the whole encounter.
As the game continues on, dares and truths being passed on from person to person, I watch him. As if I’m waiting to uncover some kind of secret reaction no one else will notice, I watch him. I’m searching for any telltale sign that he hated it or maybe liked it too much.
Eventually, he feels my stare, his hooded eyes finding mine as he asks, “What?”
“Was that your first kiss?” As soon as I ask, I realize I do not want to know the answer. I would simply rather lie to myself.
But Skylar blushes once more, slowly nodding his head. Oh.
I turn away from him, focusing back on the game. Though, unfortunately, my mood is souring by the second, and worse than the cause is the fact that it’s weighing on me so heavily when it shouldn’t matter.
I wish he had dated back in high school, or really at any point before now. Then, maybe these little moments wouldn’t feel so heavy. But they do, and for some reason, I feel robbed.
“New game!” Dante shouts. “Seven minutes in heaven. You have a coat closet, right, Sky?”
“Nope, but the bathroom is fine,” Skylar responds absentmindedly.
A girl I do not know giggles. “I say Kelly and Sky should go first.”
I speak before I can think better of the implications or the consequences. “No.”
Everyone turns to stare at me, but I say nothing else. I have nothing else to offer, to defend myself with.
“No?” Skylar questions. “Why not?”
A fuck, he sounds mad now—maybe a bit defensive too.
“Just… no.”
He’s glaring at me; I can feel it, but I refuse to look back. I refuse to look at anybody.
“Then you go, Ev,” Kelly challenges, crossing her arms with a smirk. “If you’re going to be so territorial, step up.”
It’s a dare in and of itself. A vicious, dangerous bet. Potentially even a test. I can feel everyone’s eyes on me again.
The part of me that is panicking, screaming about what people will assume or what this makes me, is begging to throw up. Yet the part of me that knows it’ll be someone else in that bathroom, touching and experiencing, has me up on my feet, glaring as I pull Skylar up with me.
I drag him to the bathroom with a quickness, desperate to escape the prying eyes of our peers as I slam the door to the soundtrack of their laughter playing on a loop in the background.
“What the fuck, Everett?” Skylar demands. “What’s your problem tonight?”
He shoves my shoulders roughly before retreating partially into the bathroom to lean against the sink.
“Nothing.” My voice is harsh, on edge, full of fear and pent-up energy.
“You’re making this birthday very stressful, you know.”
Sighing in an attempt to release some of the tension I’m holding, I run a hand through my hair before saying, “I’m sorry.”
But I’m not. Not really.
I can’t even begin to imagine what he’d be doing in here with someone else. I can’t stand to think of what it’d be doing to me at this very moment, having to grin and bear it. The thought of someone’s hands on—
This whole situation is fucked. I didn’t plan for tonight to go this way, and I’m far too intoxicated to be thinking these thoughts, to be dealing with this.
“Are you? Because if anything, you look relieved,” he counters.
I finally meet his gaze, those blue eyes cold and striking—cutting into me and tearing me apart. He does it so easily; so carelessly does he rip into me.
“So what if I am?” I spit out. “Is this not how you wanted things to go? Am I ruining your first hookup for you?”
Skylar rolls his eyes, treating me as he would a dramatic child, as he waves me off with a flick of his wrist. “Oh, please. I doubt I would have fucked Kelly.”
“You doubt? So, there was a chance.” It’s not a question; it’s a statement.
An anger I’ve never felt before is roaring inside of me at the thought, at his attitude. Skylar watches me for a moment, his own anger shifting far too quickly into interest.
Now I’m picturing a devastating scene—one in which I am not present for another of Skylar’s firsts, but Kelly is.
“Evie.” The way he says my name… It’s as if he’s trying to placate me. To tame me. “Why are you so worked up? You’ve never shown this much interest in my sex life. You’ve never cared so much.”
I laugh at him, harsh and panicked. “What sex life? You never even looked in the direction of a girl before, and not for lack of options, either. I can’t care if there’s nothing to care about.”
I’m treading far too close to the truth now; the liquor is making me too honest, terrifyingly open.
Skylar tilts his head, observing me as he would a wild animal. “That you know of.”
“Sorry?”
He grins as he says, “What, you assume I tell you everything?”
You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.
I take a few slow, careful steps toward him. “I know you tell me everything. And you just told me that kiss with Kelly was your first kiss. Don’t try to play with me, Skylar.”
His grin falls away faster than it appeared, leaving behind a familiar, expressionless cruelty—the look of a deadly pet I’ve allowed to coil too tightly around my throat.
He closes the distance between us. “I don’t appreciate you acting like my father, Everett. You don’t get a say in who I fuck, or when I fuck them. Stop interfering in my life. I don’t go around cockblock you, do I?”
Well, no. He doesn’t. Actually, now that I think about it, what right do I have? What the fuck am I doing?
Not only am I unable to have him in any other way than how I already do, but he’s never given a shit about my actions or how many people I’m sleeping with. Clearly, he’s never been… interested in me. Not in the way I sometimes look at him.
Taking a step back, suddenly filled with a dejection I’ve never truly experienced before, my eyes fall to his sock-covered feet. Guilt and shame flame my cheeks.
“Yeah, you’re right,” I murmur. “I’ll go get Kelly.”
Before I can turn away, I feel his warm palm on my bicep, stopping me.
“Evie,” he says. I do not move; I do not meet his gaze. “Don’t go.”
We stand in silence, an awkward tension filling the bathroom. I can hear his breathing. Inhale, exhale.