20. Friends? Partners? Teammates?
20
Friends? Partners? Teammates?
Clayton
R ocky and I are in his parent’s car as he drives us the thirty minutes to Imperial Beach where we’ll be spending spring break. 1 “HEARTLESS” by PLVTINUM and Goody Grace rings through the speakers of the Chevy Cruze as Rocky sings along, and I can’t help but stare at the wide smile on his face.
It’s as if just being in California, being near his family, has unlocked the side of him that he keeps buried. The one he lets no one else see. The one I’ve only been privy to a handful of times. The one I’d sell my soul to see every morning when I wake up and every evening when I go to bed.
Whoa. That thought was a new one.
His aviators cover his eyes as he drives, but I can see the smile lines peeking out the sides as he sings, not even ashamed that his pitch isn’t remotely in tune. His hands tap the top of the steering wheel to the beat, and I have to force myself to look away, fully aware I’ve had my eyes locked on him for the last two minutes.
But I can’t help it. He’s just so fucking pretty.
Nevertheless, I look out the passenger window and admire San Diego Bay as we drive down Highway Five toward Rocky’s childhood home. My phone vibrates in my lap, and I open it already knowing it’s a message from Jax.
Jax
Good game today! The two of you were dialed the fuck in. Looked like a hot one, though; make sure you replenish your electrolytes for… later.
Clay
What exactly is “later” ?
Jackson totally knows there’s something going on between Rocky and I. My best friend is quite literally the smartest person I know and not a whole hell of a lot gets past him. So, even though I haven’t told him much, he definitely knows we're more than just partners at this point.
Jax
Some team bonding if I had to take a guess.
I curl my lips in and try not to bust out in laughter.
Clay
Here’s what’s going to happen, Jackson. We’re both going to pretend I have no idea what you’re talking about and I’m going to pretend that I didn’t see you coming out of Theo’s office two days ago when you had no reason to be in there. Deal?
Three gray dots appear and disappear a couple of times before his message finally comes through.
Jax
Okay, well played.
Have fun bonding.
I roll my eyes and smile as I lock my phone and set it back in my lap, forcing myself to think about all of the ways Rocky and I could possibly “bond” this week.
I booked a hotel suite for the two of us at a resort right on the beach, hoping we would have hours of uninterrupted time over the week for activities, but one look at Rocky with his family and I knew he’d prefer to spend the week at their home.
I’ll still keep the hotel just in case though. With any luck, I’ll get to steal him away… at least for a night.
I’m not sure what happened today, but something about being around Rocky’s family… being around Rocky the way he was today… seems to have set me on edge. And I’m not entirely sure if it’s in a good or bad way.
Rocky’s words of praise had me digging deep through the whole game. My passes were perfection, my hits were lethal, and my serves hit the mark almost every single time. I was on fire. But, beneath it all, I felt a wave of anxiousness rolling through me .
Between hearing Rocky’s family cheer me on from the stands—people I had literally known for five minutes—and Rocky’s upbeat enthusiasm, it almost felt like too much to handle.
They were all just so… so… supportive.
And as grateful as I am for it, to have people behind me who want the best for me—who see the best in me—I don’t know how to handle it.
I’ve never had that in my life. Never. Not once.
My dad only cares when my actions directly affect his image. If I do something “right” not a single word, but if I do something that doesn’t meet his impossibly high and unattainable standards, which is almost always, he’s on the phone faster than I can blink. And god forbid he actually shows up for something.
And my mom… she’s more checked out than she ever was. My dad’s constant berating has slowly chipped away at the loving and attentive mother I once had when I was a small child. Now, she’s just a socialite who floats in the air of Miami’s humid breeze, flaunting her money up and down Ocean Drive and only speaking to me on my birthday and holidays.
Suffice it to say, the Campos’ warm welcome is something I wasn’t prepared for.
I wonder if Cassandra has ingredients for chocolate chip cookies ?
Noticing me anxiously bouncing my leg up and down, Rocky takes me by surprise and wraps his large hand around my thigh, just below the hem of my athletic shorts, halting my movements. The feel of his warm hand on my skin slightly calms the anxiety that’s buzzing inside of me.
“You okay?” he asks, taking his eyes off the road for a moment to look over at me. One look at my face and his smile falls and is replaced with a look of concern.
Giving him a half-hearted smile, I answer, “Fine.”
“Clay…” He drags my name out, knowing damn well that I’m feeling more than just fine .
Since when is he so in tune with emotions?
“Talk to me.”
A heavy sigh escapes me, and I absentmindedly fidget with his fingers on my thigh. “Seeing how your family, how your parents, acted today just got me thinking.”
“About your parents?”
“I couldn’t tell you the last time I experienced how your family made me feel today. They made me feel seen. They made me feel wanted. And they don’t even know me. My own parents haven’t done that for me since I was a child. And it all just made me feel a little—”
“Overwhelmed?”
Of course he gets me. I don’t know when it happened, but Rocky can read almost my every thought. Sometimes he knows how to articulate what I’m feeling better than I do.
I didn’t know how much I needed that in my life until he came along. Someone who can help me figure out exactly what I’m feeling when my own thoughts just feel too big .
“I know my family is a lot.” He gives me a sympathetic smile. “But they have always wanted what was best for me. And because you’re in my life, they’re going to want the best for you too.” His hand gives my leg a firm squeeze, and he begins stroking his thumb along my skin. Goosebumps skate up my leg. I’m not entirely used to him being this affectionate, but I’m certainly not opposed. “That means you are going to be treated as one of their own. The hugs will be neverending, the conversations will always be loud, and Lil will give you endless shit. It may be a lot but I wouldn’t change it for the world. But if at any point it feels like too much, you just tell me and we will take a break. We’ll go on a walk or hide in my room until you feel like you can breathe. You just need to tell me. Okay?”
“Thank you for understanding. For not judging.”
“I would never judge you, Garot?o .” I snort a laugh and raise my brow. “Okay, I would never judge you about something like this. Your terrible taste in music, yes. You’re feelings, never. ”
As much as I want to fucking swoon over the sentimental part of that statement, instead, I reach out and pull at his curls on the nape of his neck. “I do not have terrible taste in music.”
“You wore a Shania Twain shirt to my birthday party, Clayton.”
I pull harder. “Shania Twain is an icon. Disrespect her, and I’m not sure we can be friends.”
Rocky’s hand moves up my thigh slightly as he looks over at me again. I may not be able to see his eyes behind his shades, but I know he narrowed his gaze at me. “That’s what we are, huh? Friends?”
No, no it’s not. I want to be so much more than that. But I’m not entirely sure he’s ready to hear it. “Partners?” I ask, feigning ignorance.
His hand moves higher under my shorts. His breath hitches when he realizes I’m not wearing any briefs. “Partners?”
“Teammates?” I swallow hard as I feel the tip of his finger brush against the head of my dick as it twitches in my shorts. His grip on the steering wheel tightens to the point of his knuckles turning white.
I don’t miss the tent forming beneath his shorts as he shifts in his seat.
“Rocky… ”
“Hmm?” he asks, as he runs his finger along the length of my matching erection.
“If you don’t stop right now, I will make you pull this car over so I can fuck you on the side of the highway where everyone can see. So unless you want to show up to your parents freshly fucked, I suggest you remove your hand.”
I stare at his profile and watch as his eyes widen. He slowly removes his hand from my shorts and uses it to adjust his straining cock. My teammate’s ragged breaths fill the car, and my wishful thinking leads me to believe that he’s excited at the idea. But we can’t. As much as I am dying to sink into him, I’m not going to let the first time he’s with a man, or the first time he’s with me, be over the trunk of a car.
Ten tension-filled minutes later, Rocky’s pulling off the highway and driving through a residential neighborhood before slowly coming to a stop in front of a small craftsman style home. It has a dark gray stucco exterior, and black shutters and windows, causing the bright yellow door to stand out.
Rocky removes his aviators and sets them on top of his head, finally letting me see those green eyes. I can see the nervousness in his gaze. “It’s—it’s not much but this is where I grew up. They were able to redo the exterior a few years ago, but the inside is still the same as it was when I was a kid.”
Now it’s me who grips his thigh, silently reassuring him before I say, “It looks like the perfect place to grow up.”
He pulls his eyes from me and smiles as he looks back at his childhood home. “It really was. We didn’t have much, but that house is filled with love. So much so it’s nauseating sometimes.”
I tip my head back in laughter.
“You ready for this?” he asks, not forgetting how overwhelming this all is for me.
Taking stock of my feelings, I realize I’m no longer on the brink of crippling anxiety. Now it’s something much more manageable. Don’t get me wrong, this all is still making me incredibly nervous and I know I’m going to feel wildly uncomfortable, but I also know that Rocky is responsible for quieting all of the noise, allowing me to be as present as possible.
Giving him my most reassuring smile, I answer, “Let’s go. I’m about to be Momma Campos’ favorite.”
“I don’t doubt that for a second.” Rocky winks before throwing open the driver's side door and climbing out.
All it takes is a little fucking wink, and now I feel like I can’t breathe for an entirely different reason. “So incredibly fucked,” I mumble to myself before grabbing our bags and following him up to the bright yellow door.
1. HEARTLESS (with Goody Grace) - PLVTINUM, Goody Grace