6. Theo
6
THEO
I can't believe I did that .
I usually have more control than that.
With Grace, I…I don’t know what gets into me.
I sit on the edge of the bed, my head in my hands, trying to force my thoughts into order, but they’re spinning out of control.
My heart still pounds from everything that just happened, the heat of her skin, the softness of her lips, the way her breath hitched when I?—
No. I can't think about that.
I rub my face hard, trying to scrub the memory from my mind. But it’s useless. Grace on her knees in front of me, looking up at me through her eyelashes.
I was hers to do whatever she wanted with.
She’s so sultry, so seductive.
The way she took me into her mouth and then…
I groan and pinch the bridge of my nose as I let out a long breath.
The sound of her moans plays in my head on a loop, mocking me, reminding me of how I lost control.
Devon trusted me. Grace trusted me, and I betrayed that in the worst way possible.
God, what have I done?
I stand up abruptly, pacing from one end of the room to the other, barely able to keep my frustration at bay. It all bubbles up, threatening to explode out of me, but I shove it down.
She’s off-limits. You know that. You cannot get involved with a woman who’s living with you temporarily.
When you no longer meet her needs and she decides to, she can say whatever she wants to the world, and they’ll believe her because of Alexia.
I told myself I wouldn’t cross that line. From the moment she looked at me with those wide eyes, vulnerable and scared, I swore I’d protect her.
Keep her safe. But I didn’t protect her from me. No, instead, I let myself get pulled into something… I let myself want her too much.
The worst part is, usually, I can control my urges when it comes to a woman teasing and playing with me, regardless of what she’s saying or doing.
The pull between us is like nothing I’ve ever felt before.
I could’ve stopped at any point. I should have stopped. I could’ve walked away. But no. Instead, I gave in. I gave in to everything I’ve been feeling since the first moment I saw her. I let all of it out.
I grip the back of a chair, my knuckles white from the pressure, and stare at the door. She’s on the other side. Probably confused. Hurt. Angry. Hell, she should be all those things.
I overreacted and I know that, but there’s no turning back now.
The memory of Alexia floods back, and my stomach twists. I swore after her that I wouldn’t allow anyone in my home again.
Not like that.
Not in a way that could be misinterpreted, misused, twisted into some sick story for the tabloids.
Not after what she did to me.
I had been careful with Alexia. Polite but distant. Professional. I really was just trying to be helpful to a woman whom I thought needed help, needed a man to be kind to her and give her a hand up.
She took it the wrong way and developed a crush and when I turned her down, she lost it. She wanted more.
And when I didn’t give it to her, she told the world I had harassed her.
Made up stories, fabricated lies about how I had cornered her, pressured her, made her feel unsafe.
She had told some crazy stories, and the more that I didn’t react publicly to him, the wilder they got.
She made me out to be a monster.
I lost everything for a while. My reputation, my projects. Every producer suddenly had “scheduling conflicts,” every director “decided to go in a different direction.”
No one wanted to touch me, not with the rumors swirling around, not when Alexia made sure the media ate up every word she said.
I was labeled dangerous, predatory. And even though I was innocent, even though nothing she said was true, the stain stuck.
It took years to claw my way back. To prove that none of it had happened, to clear my name. Devon helped tremendously with it.
But it’s still there, lingering in the shadows, waiting to resurface at the slightest provocation.
And now if Grace says anything… if she feels uncomfortable, unsafe, or worse—violated—I’ll be finished. Hollywood’s unforgiving like that. Even the hint of impropriety and you can be blacklisted, erased.
No one will want to work with me, and I’ll be back to square one, but worse.
Because this time, I really did cross the line.
I groan and sit back down on the bed, my hands clenched in my lap. The memory of Alexia gnaws at me, but it’s not about her anymore. It’s about Grace.
I shouldn’t have crossed the line with her. I shouldn’t have put myself in that position.
She didn’t say no, I mean, she was clearly into it. It was a blur—one second we were talking, the next… I don’t even know how it happened.
I kissed her, and once I did, there was no going back. My mind went blank, instincts took over, and I let it happen.
I’ve never felt that connected to a woman before.
I’ve never felt so primal with a woman before, but Grace brought it all out of me.
I can still feel the heat of her body pressed against mine, the taste of her lips.
I squeeze my eyes shut, regret filling my chest. When it was over, when the fog lifted and reality slapped me in the face, when I told her it shouldn’t have happened, I saw the look on her face.
Confusion. Uncertainty. And then I panicked. Threw a damn towel at her like a coward because I didn’t know what else to do. Didn’t know how to undo the mess I’d created.
I was harsh. I know I was. But it was better that way, wasn’t it? Better to push her away, to make her angry at me, than to let her think for one second that this was okay.
It wasn’t. It never should’ve happened.
What if she tells someone?
I feel sick at the thought. Grace isn’t like Alexia, I don’t think, but if she is and she makes something up just to ruin me. No one will care about my side.
They won’t care that it wasn’t malicious, that I wasn’t trying to hurt her. All they’ll see is the headlines. The scandal. The fall from grace—no pun intended.
I’ve spent too long rebuilding everything, clawing my way back to a place where people trust me again, where my name doesn’t automatically come with a raised eyebrow and a whisper of scandal.
And all it takes is one wrong move to destroy it all. One moment of weakness.
My fists tighten at the memory of Alexia’s smug smile, the way she manipulated every word, every gesture, turning me into the villain of her story.
She knew what she was doing, and she didn’t care who she hurt in the process.
I’ve spent so long pushing people away and keeping them out. I knew I should have told Devon no.
I should apologize for being a dick afterward.
But then what? What if she doesn’t accept my apology?
What if she decides that she didn’t want sex, and I took it too far?
I take a deep breath, trying to calm the storm raging in my chest. But it’s no use.
I pick up my phone and call Devon.
“Is something wrong?” he asks immediately.
“Grace needs to go.”
“For Christ’s sake, what did she do this time?”
“She…didn’t do anything. I crossed the line with her and…”
He’s quiet on the other end for a full minute before I hear him blow out a long breath. “What do you mean you crossed the line with her?”
“We…had sex.”
He’s quiet again before I hear him snicker quietly.
“You’re freaking out because the two of you had sex? Bro, you’re a grown man she’s a grown woman, it’s fine.”
“No, it’s not. After Alexia…”
“Shit,” he interjects. “I guess I didn’t realize how all of that stuff with Alexia had royally fucked you up.”
“She lied about me to the world and continues to do it to anyone who will listen because I turned her down. I can’t…I can’t risk that and…”
“Listen, Grace is nothing like Alexia. She isn’t a woman who sleeps around. She’s very picky about who she sleeps with. She didn’t do anything with you that she didn’t want to do.”
She didn’t do anything with you that she didn’t want to do.
“Devon.”
“Theo, you’re fine. I promise.”
I blow out a very long breath as I pinch the bridge of my nose.
“Did I overreact?”
“I’m going to go with yes, which is really odd for you. You’re typically calm and collected regardless of what’s happening around you. I knew Grace…”
I stop listening to what he’s saying because he’s right. I am typically calm and collected at all times.
The problem is, Grace is everything I’ve ever wanted in a woman—smart, kind, strong, vulnerable in a way that makes you want to protect her, but also fierce enough to stand her ground.
She’s real.
And in this lifestyle, that’s hard to find.
I run my hand through my hair, pulling at the roots, trying to anchor myself in all of it. I stand up again, pacing the room, my mind racing. I have to figure this out.
“What do I do?”
“Did you try talking to her?” he chuckles drily.
“I…”
“What did you do?”
“I was really gruff with her after it happened because…because all I could think of was that I crossed a line with her.”
“Why would you think that?”
“I’m in control at all times, Dev, you know that but with her, with her, I’m not.”
“And that’s uncomfortable.”
“I…”
“Listen, tomorrow morning, you need to sit down and talk to her.
There’s nothing wrong with the two of you exploring your feelings for each other, okay?
Grace isn’t Alexia. She’s not going to ruin you—no matter what happens between you.”
I don’t believe him. I’ve been burned too hard in the past.
“Okay, I will,” I lie.
“This isn’t as bad as you’re thinking it is. I promise.”
We hang up the phone. I change into sweats and go directly to my personal gym.
I need to burn off a lot of energy because right now, all I can think about is going to Grace’s room and taking her for round two.