Chapter 13
Chapter Thirteen
Leo gave Evie a weird look when she sat down at her desk (8.20am; she’d never beat him in).
‘What?’ she said. ‘Are we presenting in the next five minutes?’
‘Not exactly,’ he said. ‘Read the email from Keith.’
Evie fired up her computer and checked her in-box. Keith’s email had been sent at 6.40am, and for once it had a subject line: all Staff must Read this .
Evie read the email and gazed at him wide-eyed. ‘Oh, shit!’
‘Yup,’ Leo agreed. ‘Double K’s being sold.’
‘The one scenario we hadn’t imagined,’ said Evie. ‘But it makes sense. My guess is that Keith and Kev had to give the new owners a report on all their staff. You’re the newest employee, so they wanted a second opinion from me. So, all our effort on the strategy paper was wasted?’
‘Not necessarily,’ said Leo. ‘Might be our way to impress the new owners. I’ve been googling them. Plumbing Ultra is huge. Founded in France. Now a multi-billion-dollar company with retails outlets across Europe.’
‘They might not give us a chance to impress them,’ Evie said. ‘Not if they’re the kind of corporate who’ll pitilessly slash and burn to improve the good old bottom line.’
She remembered Keith’s suggestion that Dennis at Straight Flush would be happy to offer her a job. Keith wouldn’t have said it if he hadn’t known there could be layoffs.
‘Good point,’ said Leo, with a sigh. ‘You don’t get to be a multi-billion-dollar company without being hard-arsed about costs. Keith and Kev run this place well, but it’s still more like a family business.’
‘Crikey.’ Evie had a sudden thought. ‘What will the new owners do with Janice? I’d like to be a fly on the wall in that HR meeting.’
‘Too much risk from the blood splatters,’ said Leo. ‘I’d vote for lurking outside the office door and rating the screams.’
Evie wanted to laugh, but there was a bubble of hysteria rather too close to the surface.
‘What now?’ she asked Leo.
He shrugged. ‘Staff meeting at ten. Guess all will be revealed.’
By nine, the whole office was abuzz. Or, more accurately, a-grumble.
‘I’ve been with Double K right from the start,’ said Nigel. ‘And those bastards swore to me they’d never sell out to a big corporate.’
‘We don’t know the full story yet,’ said Leo.
‘That’s right,’ said Ange. ‘Might have been one of those hostile takeovers.’
‘Hostile takeovers are only hostile until the buyer makes an offer so huge that the seller can’t refuse,’ said Nigel. ‘Keith and Kev will have come out of this quite nicely, the bastards.’
‘Doesn’t worry me, of course,’ said Hayley from sales, inspecting her rhinestone manicure. ‘My last day’s next week.’
‘Don’t expect a cake,’ said Nigel. ‘We won’t be allowed any non-essentials in the new budgets, bet your life.’
‘I’ll bake you one, Hayley,’ said Ange.
‘You’d be better off spending the time polishing up your CV,’ Nigel told her. ‘We’ll all be on the streets soon, mark my words. And me with five kids to support.’
‘You can always get a job as a motivational coach, Nigel,’ said Leo. ‘You’ve certainly got the knack for it.’
‘He’s from up North,’ said Ange. ‘They’re born that way.’
Into hearing range came the gristly squeak of Janice’s tea trolley. Evie watched, amused, as the thought she’d had earlier suddenly occurred to everyone else.
‘They’ll have to carry her out in a box,’ said Nigel. ‘A lead-lined one wrapped in chains.’
‘Do you think she knows?’ Ange asked, quietly.
‘If not, I vote Hayley tells her,’ said Nigel. ‘Not fair she escapes that easily.’
All talk was put on hold as Janice and her trolley entered the room. Normally, she’d greet everyone with a gruff, ‘Mornin’.’ Today, tea and scones were doled out in grim silence, and the trolley wheeled off without a backward glance. As the last squeak faded away, everyone let out the breath they’d been holding.
‘She totally knows,’ said Evie.
‘Then this might be our final scone.’
Leo held his up. Evie noted a very generous topping of jam and cream.
‘Cheers, Janice,’ said Leo. ‘Thanks for the calories.’
‘Cheers,’ everyone chorused.
‘Bastards,’ said Nigel, through crumbs. ‘I’ll never forgive them.’
To be fair, Evie thought, both Keith and Kev did look a bit sheepish at the staff meeting. Although Kev might be preoccupied with what manner of punishment his old mum was about to inflict upon him. Bets on this subject had already been placed by the staff, and the current odds-on favourite was Janice leaving her beloved council flat and moving in with Kev. Some considered this to be too cruel and unusual and had bet instead on Kev being forced to take up line-dancing down at the community hall.
Keith opened by telling them that Plumbing Ultra, after several approaches, had finally made an offer that he and Kev felt they could accept.
‘ Told you,’ hissed Nigel. ‘Bastards.’
‘But everyone can rest assured,’ said Keith, ‘that, for now, the new owners will not be making any major changes without me and Kev’s approval.’
‘Ha!’ Nigel again.
‘I know you’ll all have questions,’ said Keith. ‘But instead of a free-for-all right now, send them to me via email, so we can give them proper consideration.’
‘Cowards.’ Nigel whispered this, as Kev was now giving him a hard stare.
‘All right, that’s it,’ said Keith. ‘You can all take the rest of the day off.’
Evie and Leo exchanged a surprised look. They weren’t the only ones.
‘Go on!’ said Keith. ‘Hop it! Enjoy the sunshine.’
Everyone hopped it.
‘It’s not even ten-thirty,’ Evie said to Leo, when they were outside. ‘What do you want to do? Go get an early lunch?’
Leo lifted his face to the sun, then smiled at Evie.
‘I,’ he replied, with certainty, ‘want to go to the zoo.’
‘The zoo ?’
‘When was the last time you went?’ he asked her.
‘Maybe … two years ago?’
‘Did you enjoy it?’
‘Of course,’ said Evie. ‘It’s the zoo. What’s not to love?’
‘I haven’t been since I was five years old, and that was for a photo shoot,’ Leo told her. ‘I never had any proper friends when I was a kid, and when I was older, it felt too tragic to go on my own. So, I didn’t.’
Evie linked her arm in his. ‘Well, now you have me,’ she said. ‘And I’m exactly the kind of friend who loves pretending they’re five years old.’