Substitute for Love

Chapter 12 Avery

He pulled her down toward him, like she was in a movie and they were about to kiss. Her heart pounded in her chest, each beat urging her closer. His eyes fixated on her lips, and her breath hitched, longing for that connection. She wanted it—wanted him—but she needed him to want it too, to close the distance on his own.

But was that wise? Her mind buzzed with doubts, clashing with the heat building inside her. The last thing she expected after breaking off a long-term relationship was to find someone else so fast. She had never really dated anyone else. The thought of diving into something new so quickly was reckless. Was she ready for this? For him?

“Avery, I…” Gabe hesitated, his voice pulling her back from the edge of her thoughts. “Thanks.” He let go of her and stood, placing a hand on his head. “Ouch.”

The anticipation that had been crackling between them shattered. She let out a breath, the pent-up excitement dissipating into the cool air. Yes, Avery wanted him to kiss her, but now wasn’t the time. And what if he was only woozy, not really himself?

Gabe wobbled, and instinctively, she put her arms around him to steady him, feeling the warmth of his body seep into hers. “Woah there, buddy. I think you got up too fast.”

“I do everything too fast.” He paused, his words laced with an unspoken regret. “I probably shouldn’t have jumped in between those boys.”

She helped him sit again, her hands lingering on his shoulders, feeling the tension coiled beneath his skin. “It’s okay to protect the students, but you have to watch out for yourself too.” Her fingers found their way into his hair, brushing through the strands, scratching his scalp lightly.

“Dang. That feels good.” He closed his eyes and leaned toward the desk, a small, contented smile playing on his lips.

“Uh, Gabe?” His head started to slip from her hands, his weight pulling him down.

“Yeah?”

“You’re falling.” She held his head tighter, panic rising in her chest as she tried to keep him steady.

“Huh?”

“Gabe! Wake up.” Her voice trembled, her worry bleeding into the words.

He opened his eyes, but they were distant, unfocused, like he was looking at something far away. His usually sharp gaze was dulled by exhaustion, and something twisted in Avery’s heart.

“I think you got hit kinda hard,” she said, her voice softer now, edged with concern. “We should get you checked out.”

He giggled, the sound so out of place it made her chest tighten. “You’ve already been checking me out.”

“Gaaaaabe, I’m serious.”

“I’m so tired.” His voice was barely a whisper, his body slumping against her.

Avery sighed, the sound catching in her throat as she lifted his arm, trying to help him up. The scent of him, the feel of his strong body against hers, sent a flutter through her, a reminder of how much she wanted him. “Come on, big boy.”

Her heart was screaming at her to hold onto him, to keep him close, but her mind whispered caution, pulling her back just as her heart urged her forward.

He giggled as he stood. “I’m not grown up, really.” He put his arm around her and leaned on her slightly, Avery steadying him by putting her arm around him. He smelled like sweat and manliness.

“Oh, I know you’re not grown up.” She tried to guide him out the office door and slowly down the hall. “It’s part of your charm.” Avery surprised herself with the statement—the fact that she said it but also that she believed it.

“But I don’t have a real job yet.” Gabe’s voice sounded different. Low and sad.

“Substitute teaching is a real job,” she said. “And you’re good at it.”

“You’re nice. But I might not be here for very much longer.”

What an odd thing to say. “What do you mean?” she asked.

“I move a lot. Did you know I’ve lived in so many places?”

“I did.”

The sound of music blared as the door to the gym opened into the hallway, one of the teachers searching the hall until he turned toward Avery and Gabe.

“Oh! There you are. Is he okay?”

Avery stopped. “He might have a concussion. I’m going to take him to the 24-medical center down the street to get checked out.”

The other teacher nodded. “Good plan. Gabe, you’re going to be fine.”

“Miss Williams always takes good care of everyone,” Gabe said.

Avery tilted her head. That was probably the sweetest thing a guy had ever said to her. She had no idea it mattered to him, let alone that Gabe had noticed she liked taking care of people. Since Avery was very young, she was always taking care of others. Mom said it was her best quality. Avery stood a little taller, her chest filling with pride, something she didn’t have a lot of these days. In response, Gabe held onto her tighter. Her heart filled with warmth and she wanted to hug him right there.

The teacher disappeared back in the gym, and Avery guided him toward the exit near the parking lot.

Avery asked, “Why did you say that? About me being good at taking care of everyone?”

“Because it’s true. Oh! And you’re pretty.”

Avery laughed. Still a goofball. A sweet goofball, with a possible concussion. “Do you know what you’re saying?”

“I don’t know. Maybe. Aren’t we on a date?”

“Semi-date,” she corrected.

“Oh, I remember.” They went through the door. “I made it up,” he whispered. “So you’d go out with me.”

Avery knew concussions could be serious, but the way he was talking was absolutely hilarious. She tried her best to keep her composure.

“Careful, careful, watch the curb,” she said. They made it to his truck. “Keys?”

He pulled them from his pocket and placed them in her hand, holding it there. “I wanted to kiss you at least three times today.”

“I know.” She hid her surprise. He definitely had wanted to kiss her at her house when Avery was pinning the flower on him. Maybe on the dance floor, too. And definitely in the front office just now.

“But now I’m not sure I want to kiss you anymore.”

“Why?”

Again, he whispered. “I’m scared.”

Him? Scared? She didn’t think Gabe Manwaring was afraid of anything in the entire world. Hadn’t he put himself in danger in between the boys fighting? Why would he be scared of kissing her?

Gabe closed his eyes and shook his head. “I’m so thirsty.”

She helped him into the passenger side. “We gotta get you checked out first. I’m sure they have water at the clinic down the street.” Avery hurried to the driver’s side and they drove the few miles to the clinic.

Gabe leaned against the passenger side window, sighing heavily and staring at the houses and businesses as they passed.

“You okay?” Avery asked.

“I don’t know…” Gabe trailed off. “What am I even doing with my life?”

Avery pulled his truck into the parking lot of the clinic. “What are any of us doing, Gabe?” She thought that often, but had no idea Gabe did, too. Maybe he wasn’t superhuman. Maybe he wasn’t as carefree as he appeared.

Gabe snickered slightly, as if he didn’t have the energy to do more than that. No, this was not good. “Keep talking to me, Gabe. Don’t fall asleep!” She parked and rushed around to the passenger side, carefully opening the door. His eyes were closed. “No, wake up!” She reached around to unbuckle his seatbelt, her face next to his, their cheeks touching. She swooned. Avery wanted to linger but knew she couldn’t. She unbuckled the belt, then grabbed his shoulders. “Gabe! Oh dang, you’re even more handsome close up. Superman? Indiana Jones? Hello?” Her heart dropped at his unresponsiveness.

Then, his once placid face started beaming. A smirk started to form on his face as he opened one eye, then the other. Avery searched his face in panic, slowly realizing what was happening.

“You jerk!” She slugged him on the shoulder. “I thought you were dying!”

Avery backed out of the passenger seat and stood straight, placing her hands on her hips.

“I’m fine,” Gabe said. “Especially now I know you think I’m handsome.” He waggled his eyebrows.

“Let’s get this over with so I can take you home.” Avery tapped her foot, then grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the truck.

“Take me home, huh? You know if I can’t drive you home, you’ll have to stay at my place.”

“Gabe, knock it off.” She opened the front door of the clinic. After checking in and a short wait, a nurse called him back and took his vitals, Gabe sitting on the paper-lined exam bed and Avery sitting in a corner chair with her arms folded.

Avery tried to gauge the nurse’s concern but couldn’t read her. Was Gabe going to be okay? He had been acting funny—more so than usual—but him joking around while getting out of the truck could have been an indication that he was returning to his old self.

The nurse left, and a physician came in. “So, Gabe, looks like you were in a bit of a tumble?”

Gabe shifted in his seat and ran his hand through his hair. “Yeah, one drawback to working with teenagers.”

The doctor used a small light and checked Gabe’s eyes. “You a teacher?” The doctor grabbed a reflex hammer from a drawer.

“Just a substitute. But I’m really Indiana Jones.”

The doctor smiled as he pulled up his swivel seat and tapped Gabe’s knees. He looked up at Avery. “Does he always talk like this?”

Avery nodded. “I mean, he does think he’s Indiana Jones.”

The doctor set down the reflex hammer and picked up a clipboard and pen. “Gabe, I’m going to ask you a few questions to test your memory. When is your birthday?”

“March 2nd.”

“Who brought you here?” The doctor turned to Avery.

Gabe turned and his eyes rested on Avery. He smiled. “Her? Oh, uh.”

Avery’s eyes opened wide. Did he really get hit that hard? Her heart started beating faster. If he didn’t remember her, then Gabe wouldn’t remember when they met. Or the short time they had spent together. Avery swallowed, her throat scratchy. They hadn’t known each other long, but she didn’t want him to lose any of it.

“That’s Miss Williams. I mean Avery. The prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.”

The doctor wrote some notes, then looked up at Gabe, then glanced over at Avery.

Avery blushed, smiling as she bit her lip. She had dreamed of hearing those words. Just never imagined she’d hear them from a guy she barely knew who probably had a concussion. No matter the circumstances, it was sweet. He was sweet.

The doctor cleared his throat. “How long have you two known each other?”

“Uh… like since Monday?” Gabe answered. Avery nodded.

The doctor set down his clipboard and washed his hands at the small sink. “Huh. I would have guessed much longer.” He dried his hands and sat back down in his swivel seat. “Gabe’s reflexes are good, his pupils look fine, and he’s recalling information fairly well. The best thing is for him to go home and rest. Keep your eye on him for the next hour or so, deal?”

Avery nodded. Okay. This was good news. A sense of relief washed over her.

The doctor went to stand and Gabe put his hand on the doctor’s arm. “Wait, just one hour? Shouldn’t she stay with me the next few days? Just to be safe.”

The doctor laughed. “That’s up to her. Have a good night, you two.”

A nurse returned with a paper of instructions to care for a mild concussion, then left. Avery stood and sighed, and Gabe hopped off the exam table and turned towards her. “See? I’m totally fine. Captain America.”

Avery shook her head and rolled her eyes, feigning annoyance but feeling more relieved than anything. “Practically indestructible.”

He opened the exam room door and waited for her to walk through. “Except I still am super thirsty.”

“Let’s get you a drink, then,” Avery said. They walked out to his truck. She felt a bit cheated by having the school dance cut short. It would be nice to let the semi-date last a little longer. “Do you have a favorite?”

“I don’t know. Whatever,” Gabe said.

“It’s okay. You can try mine.”

She drove him to the nearest soda place over by Claire’s gym. They pulled through the drive-thru, ordered two dirty Cokes with coconut, then parked in the lot. She handed him the drink, and he took a sip that turned into the longest drink she had ever witnessed.

“Oh my gosh, this is amazing,” he said, immediately going back to drinking. Avery stared incredulously while he downed nearly the entire cup. He stopped, sighed, then burped really loud.

“Gross!” She laughed uncontrollably and he joined in. They laughed so much Avery was worried soda was going to squirt out her nose. It kinda burned, but the pure joy in the moment was worth the tiny bit of pain.

They finally calmed down and took deep breaths.

“That was so good.” Gabe ran his fingers through his hair.

Avery was relieved, though she would miss the overly honest Gabe. “I’m glad,” she said. “Do you… do you remember what happened?”

He lowered his eyebrows and pursed his lips. “Got beat up by teenagers?”

“Yep.”

“Got patched up by you?”

She swallowed. “Yeah.”

He stared blankly at her, as if trying to remember. “Then you took me to the clinic and the nice doctor hit my knees. Then we came here. And I let you drive my truck?”

Avery laughed. “I don’t think you realized what was going on right then.”

Gabe sank a little in his seat. “Did I say anything embarrassing?”

Where should she start? “You said you wanted to kiss me three times today.”

His eyes opened wide. “Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Well, that’s not exactly true.”

“Oh,” Avery responded. So she had completely misread him. He was only flirting when he said that. Being his silly self. Not seriously considering—

“It’s more than that.” He turned toward her. “Ever since I met you.”

Her heart beat faster and faster. Her body tingled.

“I can’t stop thinking about you,” he said, speaking more clearly than before. He turned towards her, his eyes searching her face, finally resting in her eyes. “No matter how hard I try. But I…”

“You said you were scared.” She smiled. “A little.”

“I did. Oh crap.” He laughed awkwardly. “I did, didn’t I?”

She nodded. His laugh eased her nerves a bit. “Which is funny, because I didn’t think anything scared you. You can teach any class, you can move to any new place, and you run into the middle of fighting teenagers because you’re fearless. Except for this.”

Avery reached over and took his hand in hers. Gabe looked down and squeezed hers and held on tight. He took a deep breath. “Wanting something and having something are two different things.”

“What do you mean?” she asked.

With his other hand, Gabe started stroking Avery’s hand. His gentle touch made her feel safe. Loved. She had never experienced anything so tender.

“Relationships have never worked out for me.” He cleared his throat as he peered out the window. “My parents. Girls. Honestly, my best relationship is with my dog.” He turned back towards her, his eyes sad.

Avery’s heart broke for him. Gabe deserved all the love in the world. He gave love freely. Who wouldn’t love that? “But you’re so likable. Fun. Easy to be around.” Was there a tear on his face? “Gabe, I think people take you for granted. You’re happy all the time. And you make life look easy and fun.” She paused. How to put into words how she really felt about him? “Gabe, can I be honest?”

He nodded. “Of course.”

“I was jealous of you when I first came to the school.”

He stopped stroking her hand and stared at her, his mouth slightly open.

“It’s true,” she added. “The way you calmed down the classroom. The way you knew everyone. The way you sang! I don’t think you realize how talented you are, and anybody who doesn’t appreciate—”

One second she was talking, and the next second Gabe’s lips were on hers. She closed her eyes, and for this moment in time, they were the only two people on earth. His soft lips lingered, and she kissed him back.

He gently touched her face, sending a ripple of bliss through her body. Though Avery had been kissed many times by her ex, there had never been a kiss like this. There was no truck, no soda shop. Just Gabe and Avery floating, every sense in her body excited and calm at the same time.

When they finally parted, she couldn’t remember where she was for a second. She opened her eyes to see him looking back at her.

“I like you. A lot,” he said. “I hope my burps aren’t too gross.”

Avery laughed.

“Your kiss makes up for your burps,” she said.

She leaned in to kiss him, at first Gabe jerking back slightly in surprise, but then leaning forward and meeting her lips. Avery couldn’t believe she had been so bold. But it felt natural. The second kiss was as tender and heart-racing as the first. Only when she needed a breath did she back away. The passion was unlike anything she had experienced.

“For the record,” she said, “your soda burp isn’t nearly as gross as when you shove a full sandwich into your mouth in one bite.”

Gabe smiled, embarrassed. “I like food, okay? I have no brakes, metaphorically speaking. Oh, my gosh, I gotta pee. Right now.”

Avery’s eyes opened wide. “How romantic.” He seriously had no filter. “I’m not surprised, after how fast you downed that huge soda.”

Gabe half opened the door. “Where are we?”

“We’re right next to my friend’s gym.”

“Gym?” Gabe got out and shut the door. He looked around and scratched his head.

“Gabe? Is that you?” a girl’s voice echoed outside and Avery froze. She could barely hear from inside the truck but she immediately knew Claire’s voice. And somehow she knew Gabe’s name. A pit formed in her stomach.

Claire walked toward Gabe. “Hey. Did you get my texts?”

Avery shook her head. Her head was still replaying the kiss but now what was happening? Wait a second. Claire said texts. She was texting Gabe? How in the world did they know each other?

In high school Claire knew pretty much every guy. Before Marshall, there had been a guy Avery liked. But he went for Claire instead.

So they joked Avery should date Marshall since Claire couldn’t date her brother. It had been funny at the time. Except it also really did hurt to always feel overshadowed by cute, bubbly Claire. Always feeling second best.

Now, there was her high school best friend who apparently knew the guy she kissed literally a minute ago.

Duh, Avery. You never had a real chance with him.

Claire didn’t seem to notice Avery mere feet away still in the front seat of the truck. When it was only the two of them, Avery and Claire, they had the best time. She was fun and made Avery feel seen. But when there was a guy around, it was like Avery disappeared. Like right now. Avery closed her eyes and shook her head, swallowing down sadness and regret.

Avery opened her eyes, watching through the truck wink as Claire hugged Gabe. The pit in Avery’s stomach got rock hard. It was like high school all over again. Should she get out and talk to them?

Gabe pulled away from the hug and folded his arms, then Claire stood next to him with her hand on his back, rubbing it. Like she had ownership over him somehow.

Avery’s blood started to boil, swirling heat encompassing her body. She and Gabe weren’t officially together or anything. Part of her wanted to go wrap her arms around him and claim him as her own, but that was too bold for her. Fear crept in at the thought of him not being hers to claim. Maybe whatever his relationship with Claire was… no. She didn’t want to think about her high school best friend with her current crush.

Avery’s lips trembled. She froze in her seat, not sure what to do next.

She tried to listen in on their conversation, but they were turned away and talking low. Memories of Claire trying to get Avery to go out with Marshall surfaced. Claire had denied steering her that way, and Avery had believed her, instead thinking her relationship with Marshall was totally organic and natural. Except now, looking back, was that really true?

Avery’s emotions tumbled inside. She loved her friend, but she had serious feelings for Gabe. And her friend was apparently texting him? And now was being flirty with him, rubbing his back and now leaning on him, playfully hitting him on the shoulder, her hand lingering on his arm.

Her beating heart raged and she popped out of the truck. Claire turned at the noise.

“Avery?” Claire said, her hand returning to Gabe’s back. “Wait, were you in Gabe’s truck?” Gabe stepped away from Claire, his eyes stark, but she followed him.

“Uh, yeah,” Avery said. “We have been subbing at the same school this week.”

“And spending Saturday together?” Claire asked. She made it sound like that was the lamest thing either of them could do.

Gabe answered in a harsh tone, “We chaperoned a dance.” He was still crossing his arms, acting and sounding very closed off and un-Gabe-like.

“I’m sorry, how do you two know each other?” Avery finally asked.

Claire turned to Gabe. “Oh, you know. We’ve been dating.”

Gabe narrowed his eyes and shook his head. He cleared his throat though he remained tense. “We were dating. Over the summer. A bit.”

And there it was, what Avery feared the most. They had dated . Super recently. Because any guy Avery wanted, Claire got. If Gabe was her target, then Avery should move out of the way right now.

Claire laughed. “More than a bit. You practically lived at the gym. Anyway, haven’t seen you in a while.” She paused, then looked up at him, her lashes fluttering. “Wait a second. Are you two…” she trailed off. “Nah, you definitely aren’t each other’s types.”

Avery’s heart sank. What was she supposed to say in response? If Claire had been her best friend, then she should have told her about Gabe. But then, nothing had really happened until minutes before. She ran circles in her head, trying to figure out what to say that would make sense to herself, let alone to Claire.

“Really? What’s my type, Claire?” Gabe asked.

“Duh, Gabe. Totally me. Remember when you used to help me close the gym? You were like a puppy, following me around.”

Duh, Gabe. Bile rose up her throat. Claire sounded like Marshall. Anger flooded her veins. Partly because of Claire and partly because Gabe had a recent past with Claire. Avery hadn’t known him long enough to even know any of his past, so it wasn’t her business. But their kiss just now made her think that he was at least available. Maybe he was, or maybe… ug. No. Maybe Avery was Gabe’s rebound.

Gabe’s face went red. “It wasn’t like that.” He looked at Avery, as if trying to explain. “Remember, Claire? You made it clear that—”

Claire quickly turned toward Avery and cut off Gabe. “You look great in my green dress. It wasn’t what I would pick for a dance, but… wait a minute! You and Gabe match.” She pointed to his shirt. “So it was a date? For reals?”

Semi-date . Until the kiss, anyway. Avery wasn’t about to say all that out loud. Her body was so tense, she didn’t realize until her jaw hurt. Now it was totally locked. But what, what had Gabe been saying about what Claire? She made it clear that… what?”

“I was taking Avery home,” Gabe said to Claire. He stepped away from Claire and over to Avery, motioning for her to get in the truck with him.

“No need, silly,” Claire said, making light of the whole situation. “She lives closer to my place. I can take her,” Claire offered. “Anyway, we haven’t seen each other in a while, so it would be a good time to catch up.”

Avery wanted to go with Gabe. No, she wanted to go with Claire. If only she had her car, she could go home alone and forget this mess.

But at the same time, Avery wanted the whole story from both of them. Separately. Ahhh! Her brain filled with fog. She felt betrayed by two people she had trusted. Had her best friend been seriously dating her new crush, and not even that long ago?

Avery’s emotions swirled downward until she labeled herself what she was: a rebound. Nothing special. The girl of the moment. Wasn’t Gabe just telling her relationships didn’t last long for him? Why did Avery think she would be any different for him?

She looked at Gabe, then back at Claire. She couldn’t win.

“You okay, Gabe? I mean, are you good to drive home by yourself?” Avery asked. Now she was really torn. If she drove Gabe home, she wouldn’t have a way home. So he’d have to drive her home, which means more driving for him. He should just go home and rest, anyway.

Gabe stood with his hands stuffed in his pockets, his body stiff. “I’m fine. Thanks for the soda, Avery.” He turned and headed towards his truck.

Avery shrugged and reluctantly followed Claire to her car. The date, or semi-date, or whatever it was, was officially over. At the last second, she turned back to Gabe’s truck, but it was already gone. Yet again, Avery let Claire take control. Bulldoze her. They hadn’t hung out in years, but suddenly it was like they were teenagers.

“When you told me you were subbing, I wondered if it was the same school as Gabe. But since he and I were only together over the summer months…”

Avery winced at the word “together” as she got into the front seat.

“…I never knew which school it was at. I tried texting him about it, but you know how Gabe is. He’ll go for days without answering. Am I right?” Claire put the car in drive and pulled out of the parking lot.

Actually every time Avery texted, Gabe texted right back. Then again, they had only known each other since Monday.

“So, uh, how did you two meet?” Avery asked, her arms folded, trying to keep her voice even. She hoped she was masking her disappointment.

“At the gym. Sometime in late May or early June I think. He basically came in for the free week trial and never left. I guess leaving all those flyers at the schools were effective.” She giggled, as if her relationship with Gabe was the result of a marketing ploy.

“Were you serious?” Avery wanted to know, but at the same time didn’t want to know. Her heart stopped with the potential of bursting at any moment.

“Oh, you know me,” Claire said, navigating the streets to Avery’s house. “All sorts of guys come into the gym. But Gabe and I, we had fun. If you know what I mean.”

It took everything in Avery’s power not to punch Claire or hurl herself out of the car. Hot tears bubbled to the surface, but she held them back, willing them to stay put. To appear unaffected, she kept her voice even. “Gabe said you only dated a bit.”

“Okay, technically we spent most of our time together in the gym. But we did like to make out at the movies. And in his truck.”

How could she say that? Even if those things had happened, why would Claire pick now to confide her summer with Gabe? Was Claire that clueless? She had to know that Avery and Gabe were at least interested in each other. They had been to a dance together. She even pointed out that they matched, like a real date.

“Oh,” was all Avery could squeak out before turning to the window and gulping down the pain and disappointment.

A knife stuck into Avery’s heart. Only minutes ago, she was on top of the world enveloped in his kiss. Their soft, perfect, passionate kiss. Now this. Avery was literally the next girl, and she could never compete with Claire.

She knew Gabe was too good to be true.

After she said goodbye to Claire and headed inside her house, Avery wiped away a few tears. The house was dark, and Mom was already asleep in the recliner with the TV still blaring. Avery turned off the TV. Her mom blinked, slowly sitting up and rubbing her eyes.

“I must’ve dozed off again,” she said, a hint of a smile playing on her lips. “I was waiting up for you. How’d it go?”

“Great. Just great.” Avery was glad the room was dark, and she hoped her mom wouldn’t notice the sadness behind her voice.

“Oh, I gotta send you the photo of the two of you. Anyway, tell me more about it tomorrow, promise?”

Later, after she slipped under the covers, she checked her phone. The only text was from her mom. She opened the photo of her and Gabe and studied it for a minute. His wild hair. His kind eyes. His adorable smile.

She would have forwarded it to him—if the night had ended differently. In a way, it was best to have everything out in the open. As hard as it was to admit, she truly was okay being single. After Marshall, it wasn’t a good idea to jump into something else so soon. Gabe was a nice guy and they had fun. But Claire was right—he wasn’t her type. Or she wasn’t his type. Or something.

What was Avery’s type? She only ever dated Marshall, and now she had kissed Gabe. Avery shook her head in confusion. The two were night and day different. Maybe Avery was still figuring out what she needed in her life.

Maybe she should text Gabe thank you for the semi-date, but that they should just stay friends. Co-workers. So when they ran into each other at school, things wouldn’t be so awkward. Avery opened his texts, reading through their cute banter from only hours earlier. Her heart sank, but she didn’t let herself feel sad. If their—friendship? Relationship?—had been longer and they had been officially together, maybe even in love, then she find out about Claire?

Avery shook her head. Why did it all even matter? Claire and Gabe weren’t together anymore. It wasn’t like they couldn’t… do what they did in his truck. Kiss like the best kiss of all time. She swooned. Relived the moment in her mind. It had felt so good. Gentle yet electric, sending shivers down her spine and making her heart pound in a way both thrilling and terrifying. In that moment, nothing else mattered—just the taste of him, the feel of his lips on hers, and the dizzying realization that she could get lost in him if she let herself.

But maybe she didn’t deserve a fairy tale kiss like that. Or maybe it wasn’t real.

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. No. Again she stopped herself from going down that road. Things were messy and she needed to focus on helping her mom and getting a long-term job and having a life outside of dating and men.

Three dots appeared in Gabe’s text window. He was awake, maybe laying in his bed, about to text her. Avery’s heart fluttered. What was he going to say? What did she even want him to say?

The brain part of her wanted him to admit it had all been a mistake so she wouldn’t have to be the one to tell him. Deep down, in her heart of hearts, that wasn’t what Avery truly wanted. For a solid five minutes, the three dots appeared, then disappeared, appeared, then disappeared. Her head pounded and her heart sank even lower with anticipation.

“Gabe. What are you doing? Text me already.”

Her phone dinged. Excitement pricked her, until she realized who the text was from. Marshall? Why?

MARSHALL: I’m coming to town next weekend. I want to see you.

Avery closed her eyes and put her hand over her face. This was the worst timing. She did not want to see him. But she knew he’d be relentless, plus he knew where her mom lived. He’d find a way to find her.

She’d deal with it later. With a few taps, she was back to staring at Gabe’s text window. The three dots appeared, then disappeared, again and again. After what seemed like an eternity, Avery couldn’t take it anymore. “Gah!” She turned off the sound on her phone, put it in the drawer of her nightstand, then went to sleep.