Chapter 81
Ben, August 10
I suppose there are men out there who think I’m insane. Here I am, sitting over 4,000 miles from home, reading parenting books with my pregnant girlfriend. Oh, and it’s not even my baby in her uterus. Oddly, it doesn’t feel awkward. A year ago it would’ve freaked me out. Hell, if you’d told me Liz — who I’ve loved for ages — would put me in this situation, I think younger me would’ve run screaming from the room. What guy imagines he’ll be raising some other bloke’s kid?
Maybe that’s why I accept it. Matt doesn’t really have a love child, does he? Liz and Matt were never in love. I, on the other hand, have never loved anyone besides Liz. So when I imagine her struggling through the ocean of parenthood alone, I get physically sick.
When it comes right down to it, I’d rather be in this unconventional situation with Liz than be miserably alone in London, downing pints and picking up random women in some pub just to forget about her.