Chapter 26
I’d gotten part of what I wanted, that was for sure.
My knees still felt weak, hours after Theo had left me writhing and breathless on the couch in his office. I’d been so disappointed when he’d refused to go any further. And all because of West.
This was ridiculous. I was tempted just to tell West myself and let him deal with it. I was a grown-ass woman. Why was I letting my brother dictate my love life?
I stopped short at that thought.
Was it love I felt for Theo?
Hardly. It was lust, pure and simple.
Sure, I’d known him forever. Yes, he’d always been there for me. In fact, he’d been there for me in my darkest moment. He’d saved me, there was no doubt about that. I shuddered to think of what Avett would have done to me if Theo hadn’t shown up that night.
But he had.
And I was beyond grateful.
If West wasn’t in the picture, maybe that first kiss on that fateful night would have turned into something more. But things hadn’t gone that way.
Instead, we were tangled up in this mess of forbidden lust and…yes, maybe love.
It was hard to admit to myself.
I’d been dead set on getting my way – into Theo’s pants – but now that we’d gone farther, I knew the tender kiss we shared today had changed everything. It had brought forth all the feelings I’d been burying for years. All the times he’d teased me, or cracked some stupid joke, or come to my rescue when I needed him, they all rushed to the surface like a wave of memories that broke loose all the boards I’d used to lock away my heart.
No, this wasn’t just lust anymore. And that meant I needed to figure out exactly what to do about it.
I didn’t have many options. I hated that I had to consider my brother’s feelings in all of this. But Theo respected West, and I had to respect their friendship, as much as it pained me to let it get in the way.
There had to be a solution. There had to be a way where I could express my feelings for Theo, without blowing up our entire circle.
I contemplated telling West everything myself. After all, he had Kaylee now. Maybe that would soften his heart a little to what Theo and I were feeling?
He’d been furious with me countless times before for random things, I knew once more couldn’t hurt me.
But Theo? He’d be crushed without West in his life.
I wrestled with my thoughts endlessly, finally falling asleep that night with Theo’s stormy eyes flashing in my mind.