Chapter 21 #2
“Mmm…papi, you could put a little more pressure,” I suggested in a sleepy voice, and at the sound of papi, he didn't hold back.
It was like one minute, he was warming me up, then the next I was raising my hips to meet every lick. Sometimes I wish I had the strength to just savor it, but with Josue’s skills, I could never hold out for long.
“We done celebrating, or—”
“Josue, take your clothes off,” not sure why he was debating it. There was a lot of peeling, kissing, rolling around, and pinning before he gave the light command of “?Date la vuelta*!” prompting me to turn around for him.
Pulling me close to the edge of the bed, his weight consumed me, as his length spread me open. “Oh my god,” I strained as he softened his pace to check on me.
“You okay, mami?”
“Mmmhmm…” I shrieked. “I just need a warm-up starting out like this,” I laughed, surprising myself that in this moment, he overwhelmed me.
“Show me how you want me to,” he suggested, adjusting his weight so that I could back it up on him. Gently fisting my locs, he moaned in response to each push my ass came down on his dick.
“Damn, ma. Now I need you to slow down for me,” he joked, slowing down my hips with his strength.
Getting into all fours, Josue brought his hands on each side of my hips, finding the ideal rhythm for both of us, the sound of 90s R&B competing with us.
It wasn't long before we were both raising the white flag and collapsing into the space next to each other.
“Not bad for wanting to fuck you in every hotel,” he said, bringing me close to kiss me again. “If I didn’t know any better, I'd say you like me,” he joked.
“Well…I do like this.” I climbed on top of him, melting deeper into the kiss.
“We check out soon. Interested in painting the town red?” A sincere longing in his eyes.
“Actually, I was hoping to leave a little earlier, if that was okay. Especially if our time here is done.”
“Got plans I don't know about?” Josue asked trying to seem nonchalant.
“I wanted to make a stop in Philly. If that's okay.” Choosing not to go into too much detail, since he knew what Philly meant.
“Should I get a hotel room? Or is it a trip that you wanted to make solo?” he asked, twirling my loc between his fingers. It was so close to my daughter's birthday, and it felt selfish to split my time between her and him.
“You'd probably be bored. Plus, I don't think I'd be a proper host to show you the real Philly, since I'd be busy. Maybe another time?”
“Okay,” he agreed.
***
I didn’t spend a whole lot, mainly because of trauma, but it was surreal to check my bank account, that I had to constantly pinch myself at the numbers. Felt like if I blinked, I’d be in the red again, but it’d take a financial crisis to clear this kind of money out.
My first pit stop in Philly was Walmart, not the best place to shop, but the only one stop shop close to Sondra’s area.
I could get toys and books. Winter jackets, and clothes to surprise Mónica with.
She’d be four, and it wouldn’t be long before she’d be starting school, so I wanted this year to be extra special.
My childhood had been nothing but survival, and even though she was still at the age where my presence excited her more than gifts, I still wanted birthdays and holidays to be memories that lasted for her.
She was brighter than anyone would’ve noticed in me, so I got her so many picture books, because I knew she picked up things fast, so one day she’d read them without my help.
I liked reading her stories. Or maybe I just wish someone had loved me enough to read to me, that I got too much out of watching her reaction whenever something cool or surprising happened in the story.
I could already tell she’d like reading before she even started school.
“Do you want me to read you another one?” I insisted, even as she kept trying to get me to kiss her Coco plush, a Bluey character she liked so much because she was all pink. I’d actually gotten her a bunch of stuffed animals, but she was at that age where she bonded most with that one.
When Mónica didn’t want another story, I followed my typical routine of doing her hair so she’d look nice for her birthday.
When my time here was coming to an end, I wanted to show Sondra all the winter clothes I got Mónica before the weather started getting cold. I even gave Sondra more money, despite it not nearly being enough compared to what she’s been doing for Mónica.
“Mamá, keep your money,” she initially refused.
“I know it doesn’t make up for her being here all this time, but I promise there’s more to come. Especially after next week, I’ve got a really big match coming up. Maybe even enough to have that talk about whether it’d be a good time to consider a different home for Mónica?”
“We'll see,” Sondra dismissed.
“What do you think, Mónica? Would you like if you came and lived with me?” I asked, as she smiled and nodded, but I did consider she might miss her grandmother. “You can still visit abuelita whenever she's open to visit—”
“Sierra, don't get her hopes up. Just play everything by ear for now.” I asked to speak to Sondra in private, so it wouldn't look like we were arguing.
“Sondra, I'm serious. I don't know when, but I'll be coming on some bigger money soon, and I just want everyone to be prepared for it.”
“I believe you, mamá, but she's three. I don't want her to hear that and get disappointed if it falls through,” she defended.
“I know I could be doing more. I'm just focused on my next fight since I know that payday’s actually coming. I’m just planning ahead.”
“Well, do you even got a place lined up?”
“Not yet.”
“Well, are you gonna get it in New Jersey or in Philly?”
“I don't know yet.”
“Which is why, until you do, let's just focus on what we have control over,” she said, picking up a bag of pistachios to snack from.
“Are you eating pistachios?” I asked through squinted eyes.
“Yeah, Sierra. I’m starving,” she spoke through a mumble, chewing through the texture.
I shouldn’t have been worried, but it had me on edge. “I hope you don't let Mónica near those—”
“Mamá, you remind me every time. She has a nut allergy, I know!”
“I just don’t want any mistakes to happen. Anything could trigger it. I don’t even kiss her if I’ve had anything that might.”
“Sierra, I’m careful. It’s just, maybe these kids today would be more tolerant of stuff if you actually let them eat it, rather than avoid it,” voicing her opinion.
“Well, I don't want to chance her health over what people think she should have,” I defended.
“Either way, I always have her EpiPen on hand.”
“Yeah, but the point is to not need them. I'm trusting you with my baby's life. I'm not trying to be mean it in a rude way, but just please respect that.”
Sondra placed her hand on her hip like she was tired of talking about it. “Sierra, I know how to raise a kid. Mónica wouldn't even exist if I hadn't,” she countered. “I’m careful, just…know that I’m careful.”
Grabbing my bag, I decided it was time to go.
"Well, I have to catch the last train to Newark. So, I'm just gonna say goodbye to Mónica,” as I excused myself to kiss my daughter goodbye. Was it too soon or idealistic to consider taking Mónica back? I had some money, but I wasn’t sure I wanted to uproot her from Philly.
Where did that leave my career? I’m sure Josue wouldn’t be willing to train me if I lived outside of Newark.
But then again, I couldn’t make a big decision like getting a place solely on whether he’d be willing to still work with me if my location happened to change. But I wouldn’t even have been able to consider other options if it hadn’t been for him.
I’d still be in a shelter and struggling without direction had it not been for him. I didn’t know what I was ready for, but for now, I had to focus on what waited for me next week.
Vegas.
***
“Oh fuck, Sierra. ?Dime lo buena que soy, mami*!” Josue demanded, an after-hours practice gone feral, in the cage.
There’d been a lot on my mind, so we’d went an hour over, and honestly, nothing could have put my mind elsewhere than Josue slamming into me from behind.
When we were fucking the shit out of each other, I didn’t worry about the future. I just worried about the now.
“Josue, I’m about to fucking come!” I announced, as his hips slow rolled against my backside, as we rode the wave together.
Moans and groans of pleasure echoed in the empty gym, even as our bodies came down from each other.
It was like, we were never going to stop coming back for more.
Like an addiction. Only addictions you could withdrawal from.
I was sure there was no way getting Josue out my system.
“Ma, you really got me fucked up,” Josue laughed, reaching for his clothes. “Got me doing shit I never do. The cage has always been my refuge, but never like this.” As he wrestled me before I could get my bra on, pulling me on his lap to steal a kiss.
“What was that all about?” Josue wondered, reminding me I had prompted this.
“I just needed to get my mind off things. Hope I’m not disrespecting the cage,” I said.
“It’ll be fine. But everything’s good back in Philly?” he asked with genuine concern.
“Yeah.”
“Good.” Glad he didn't ask more for ask me for details. “So, my guess is, what you're trying to avoid thinking about is what's a week away?” he asked, guessing correctly.
“Do you really think I'm ready for Vegas?”
“You better be,” Josue, locked eyes with mine. “Because best believe that DaCosta’s gonna sure as hell be ready for you.”
* Turn around
* Tell me how good I am, girl